Goodness knows, I have written on here so often, but my head is such a mess with it all.
I think it is because all this dementia thing accelerated so quickly it took me by surprise.
My expectations of the poor ould fella are too high, I know they are, and I am finding it so hard to keep them at an ever decreasing level. I find myself snapping at him, because I cannot stand the way he is now. He keeps catching me out when he does not understand, because there seem to be 'little windows' when he is OK. For example, yesterday he whalloped me in three games of scrabble - his previously high level of functioning. Other days he can barely work out how to play the game.
Is this horrid disease one of highs and lows? Like yesterday? I know I have mentioned it before ( sorry ) but yesterday he was peeing in the bathroom sink, and last night picking the dry skin off his belly and making a little pile of it besides his pillow - but at the same time was able to play and win three high scoring games of scrabble ?!?!?!
Am I overthinking things? I am a researcher by trade, so perhaps that is the problem - I am trying to find answers where there are not any.
It's doing my head in.......
I think it is because all this dementia thing accelerated so quickly it took me by surprise.
My expectations of the poor ould fella are too high, I know they are, and I am finding it so hard to keep them at an ever decreasing level. I find myself snapping at him, because I cannot stand the way he is now. He keeps catching me out when he does not understand, because there seem to be 'little windows' when he is OK. For example, yesterday he whalloped me in three games of scrabble - his previously high level of functioning. Other days he can barely work out how to play the game.
Is this horrid disease one of highs and lows? Like yesterday? I know I have mentioned it before ( sorry ) but yesterday he was peeing in the bathroom sink, and last night picking the dry skin off his belly and making a little pile of it besides his pillow - but at the same time was able to play and win three high scoring games of scrabble ?!?!?!
Am I overthinking things? I am a researcher by trade, so perhaps that is the problem - I am trying to find answers where there are not any.
It's doing my head in.......