Mum has been in hospital for 7 weeks and has deteriorated dreadfully - she is pretty advanced into the disease and becomes very distressed. She is due to leave hospital on Monday to go to a new nursing home. She won't know the people transporting her and she won't know the people in the new home. I have been told i can't go with her in the transport. Mum is no different to a child and im sure they wouldn't send a child without a family member. I don't have transport so won't be able to get to the Home for at least an hour avd half after she does. I don't know the Home or staff either. When i asked the person arranging transport whether she had told them mum has advanced dementia she said no that isn't relevant. Another example of where hospitals don't have an understanding of dementia at all. I have email the patients advice service and there is no sister on duty so u am stuck as ti what to do. At least im not an elderly spouse trying to support mt loved one but this isn't right and its poor mum who will suffer. My brother had learning disabilities and when he left another hospital i was able to accompany him so if they can allow it why not this hospital
Accompanying mum in transport from hospital
- Thread starter ChristinaG
- Start date
Of course you should go with your relative to the care home!! I work in a hospital and book transport all the time for patients being transferred to varions locations. There is no way I would stop a relative travelling - in fact the transport service ask if anyone else needs to travel to support the patient. Be assertive - ask for the name of the person saying this and tell them you will put in a complaint. Ask for the name of the matron who is responsible for the wArd. Good luck and let us know how you get on.
Dear Chris,
Is there any way you could visit or phone the home before your mum arrives because I'm thinking that if you were to take a few of her things before she arrives it would help her to feel a little bit at home. Also can't you ask the hospital why you can't travel with her to check that this is correct?
MaNaAk
Is there any way you could visit or phone the home before your mum arrives because I'm thinking that if you were to take a few of her things before she arrives it would help her to feel a little bit at home. Also can't you ask the hospital why you can't travel with her to check that this is correct?
MaNaAk
Thank you so much for this - I seem ti be raising things all the time in this hospital. I will try tomorrow as it's 7.30 pm now. I hope i can speak to someone on a Saturday
There might well be someone here to clarify your predicament in 'official' terms. But an assessment on discharge from the hospital should most certainly include you, as the daughter, in what exactly is taking place. You might well hold POA also or Healthcare POA. But I cannot see why you should not accompany your mother, barring an 'ambulance' situation. When people are living with dementia, especially if 'advanced', then hospital stays can be frankly destructive. There should be either a Carer from the new Home, or a 'qualified' escort during the transport period. To say that to mention that someone who has advanced dementia in the scenario you present, 'isn't relevant' beggars belief. Alas, your sentiments in respect of 'where hospitals don't have an understanding of dementia ..' holds true in so any cases. That 7 weeks in hospital, in relation to dementia alone, constitutes a fundamental need for a very 'hands on' approach during the transition to the new Home.
I have the name of the person and told her I would complain. She said do! Speak to the sister but she isn't here now.
Im afraid mum won't recognise any of her things. She just clings to me when she is in distress which is often now a days so I stay with her along as i can to try and reassure her. I don't accept that it us right that the hospital won't let ne go with her. It's just uncaring and if they are allowed to keep getting away with these practices people with dementia will always be treated badly.
Hi
Just a thought, when Mum was in hospital, I walked past the transport office to get to the ward and they were there all the time and so friendly, always a wave and a smile.
Is it worth finding the office when you are next there and asking to be included in the move. X
Just a thought, when Mum was in hospital, I walked past the transport office to get to the ward and they were there all the time and so friendly, always a wave and a smile.
Is it worth finding the office when you are next there and asking to be included in the move. X
Thanks to all who responded to my thread. The Pals service though closed advised on their answer phone to call the hospital and ask for the clinical site manager if urgent so i did this morning. He couldn't understand why I was told i couldn't accompany mum and went to personally check with the ward. He called me back and said this had all been arranged now. He also commented that on the contrary it would be helpful to transport staff for me to be with mum. So all is well. However, this begs the question, as always, as to why we carers need to keep pursuing these things when we have to cope with our loved ones having such a terrible disease. It's a double whammy every time. Thanks again as it made me realise it was a reasonable request.
Glad you got a good resolution to what should have been a straightforward yes of course you can and we would be grateful. Hopefully the obstructive staff member is being sent for retraining!
Hooray!!!! Glad it was sorted for you and thanks for letting us know. I'm only guessing but could just have been ignorance of the 'rules' for patient transport but a letter / email to PALS wouldn't go amiss and will be fed back to the ward leader. Hopefully no-one else will have to go through this worry. Best wishes to you and your mother.
I read your initial post with horror, so good to know it's been sorted out for you now, Christina.
I'm also one who was horrified by your initial post.
I have travelled on patient transport with my husband several times. I didn't even have to ask - it was taken as a given.
Well done on challenging them and getting the right outcome - but I totally agree that it is a sorry situation when carers have to fight and chase up every little thing at such stressful times.
I hope things go as smoothly as possible on Monday.
I have travelled on patient transport with my husband several times. I didn't even have to ask - it was taken as a given.
Well done on challenging them and getting the right outcome - but I totally agree that it is a sorry situation when carers have to fight and chase up every little thing at such stressful times.
I hope things go as smoothly as possible on Monday.
Dear Chris,
I have to admit that was the part of your thread that I couldn't respond to because I couldn't actually believe it! I was also probably a little bit of a mess as a carer when I responded to your thread because of dad's Alzheimers becoming severe. I don't know what to suggest except to lodge a possible complaint to the health ombudsman or maybe your local mp.
I'm sorry I can't be of anymore help but I can wish you good luck.
Sending my hugs to you and your mum
MaNaAk
