In my case, what I cannot get my head around is that he now pees in the wash hand basin in the bathroom - oh, how I wish we had an ensuite, or cloakroom he could use -but we don't !!
Is it the seemingly small things that lead us to breaking point? As in the straw and poor old camel?
- Thread starter maryjoan
- Start date
I had to deal with this one too. I took everything off the sink (soapetc) and followed him with antibacterial spray. And lots of rinsing. I think it might be that the sink looks a little like a urinal. Also I did have fewer floor puddles...one or the other needed cleaning each time!
As far as the last straw is concerned...I think we all have one, though there are a number of false ones along the way.
As far as the last straw is concerned...I think we all have one, though there are a number of false ones along the way.
I am sure you are correct there - looking like a urinal!! And the fewer puddles on the floor - perhaps bathrooms in houses should have urinals fitted - just a thought!
Maybe he thinks the basin is a urinal.
We don't have this problem exactly but OH has destroyed three toilet seats in the last few months. I have no idea what he does to them but I am getting very good at replacing them.
We don't have this problem exactly but OH has destroyed three toilet seats in the last few months. I have no idea what he does to them but I am getting very good at replacing them.
Yes, the small things accumulate, don't they. I don't have the peeing in the pedestal (Could a woman do that?!!!) thing but one of my pet hates is when my wife tries to help with the washing up. I cringe when I see what she does but let her get on with it as it's good for her to feel she's helping. I don't tell her I have to redo the washing when she's out of the room!In my case, what I cannot get my head around is that he now pees in the wash hand basin in the bathroom - oh, how I wish we had an ensuite, or cloakroom he could use -but we don't !!
Oh definitely it's often a protracted period of 'little things' which can suddenly build up and send one over the edge. The analogy of the straw on the camel's back is quite apt. It's carrying a 'load' for a long time, which one has become used to and then suddenly having one slight thing added, which pushes one to distraction disproportional with the actual trigger.
Oh quite right indeed
At the end of last year I felt I had all this nailed and I was like 'bring it on, 2018, I can do this' I had a grip of his physical problems and the dementia.
Boxing Day Night and everything went pear shaped again, with a completely different medical condition that came out of the blue - and it knocked me more sideways than I could have imagined - I felt completely out of my depth and cheated when I thought I had things on track. It did not help that this was the THIRD Christmas in a row, he had ruined for himself and everyone with his health !!!
Onward we go again, another path and unexpected !!!
Definitely. I sailed (well sort of kayaked) through the lack of continence, the refusal to shower etc but what got to me was the stupidest things: Like she would not flush the loo at night in case she woke someone (she had her own en-suite bathroom, different floor to other bedrooms) and she would always get up to poo in the night; and tissues, tissues, tissues - bits of kitchen roll, toilet roll, handkerchiefs and just bits of paper generally, folded and tucked away under cushions, under the mattress, in bags (hand and shopping), under car seats, under rugs...
What is intriguing about this awful awful condition is the variety of weird and wonderful things that us carers go through - thank goodness for TP - in the old days people were 'just senile' at least we have a bit better insight now....
I can so agree with "it's the little things"
OH continually complains of feeling cold even when the heating is on at full blast. He wears a woolly hat in doors, which doesn't annoy me, but he tucks his trouser bottoms in his socks because the draught makes his legs cold! He looks looks so silly. I wonder if we can still buy cycle clips Lol
I just wish Alzheimers was never invented !
OH continually complains of feeling cold even when the heating is on at full blast. He wears a woolly hat in doors, which doesn't annoy me, but he tucks his trouser bottoms in his socks because the draught makes his legs cold! He looks looks so silly. I wonder if we can still buy cycle clips Lol
I just wish Alzheimers was never invented !
Just how I feel, other people think they know what it is like but they don’t, yiu have to experience it to know.Don't we all.
I know there are lots of other horrible illnesses,but this is, in my opinion,the cruellest, because it is so protracted and we lose them so, so slowly and heart-breaking to watch.
I can recommend these, my m-il had one. they are an 'over-blanket and use less electricity than a light bulb. Plus you don't get over-heated yourself.
I'm just going to get her one anyway. So many times I've gone ahead with ideas in spite of the objections and it's worked! Thanks for this tip.
Yes well put. And one’s reaction appears to others to be out of all proportion to the infinitesimally small - or even relatively small - trigger. Maddening. It’s hard enough that others cannot understand what the 24/7 carer’s deal is like. It makes it so much worse, and the gulf in comprehension - frustrating at the best of times - is then exacerbated by the view that we are overreacting.
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Oh how I can relate to this and most arise from a mantra my OH has had all her life in regard to ‘common sense,’ ruling all. Problem is our common senses no longer relate to each other but hers is always right but when noted down as I did one time all seem so minor and picky. Plus none of this ever shows when her sons visit or we visit others so no one can see what the big issue is!
I did chuckle when I read JBK's bit about cold all the time, I am so not looking forwards to summer again this year and I fear our boy will desert me due to OH's continued insistence of closing all the windows blinds and curtains even though its 90+....oh what fun last year was sitting at my computer in a puddle of sweat and wondering why till I looked around..
We have a few of those odd "small" things that wind us up think the rubbish bin is the biggie I know she's trying to be helpful but even with notes and explaining what goes where it still takes her 10 mins to put stuff in a bin as she's constantly pulling labels off ripping boxes up so they're flat, I know its not her fault but I have tried to tell her she's not really helping anyone as most will end up in landfill but hey ho its a jolly ol time for sure.
Baz
We have a few of those odd "small" things that wind us up think the rubbish bin is the biggie I know she's trying to be helpful but even with notes and explaining what goes where it still takes her 10 mins to put stuff in a bin as she's constantly pulling labels off ripping boxes up so they're flat, I know its not her fault but I have tried to tell her she's not really helping anyone as most will end up in landfill but hey ho its a jolly ol time for sure
.Baz
OK, I am home now after a very worthwhile holiday lasting 3 days if you don't count the 2 travelling days.
As the coach came into the local town, I noticed a scruffy old man in the middle of the road, with his beanie hat on crooked - he tripped in the middle of the road, and regained his equilibrium - you've guess who it is, I know, yes, so had I - my OH!
Today - day 1 of no more respite on anyone's horizon
He has decided not to shave again.
He hasn't had a shower for almost a week
He has tried to open another bank account to put his winnings in when he comes up on the post code lottery.( ha ha ha )
He is still peeing in the wash hand basin
He inspected a 'tee-pee' I made this afternoon to grow the sweetpeas up - and thought it was a new tree I had planted.
He decided to mow the lawn - the garden is MINE!- but encouraged him to 'help' now the lawn in completely chewed up.
wonder what tomorrow will bring??
As the coach came into the local town, I noticed a scruffy old man in the middle of the road, with his beanie hat on crooked - he tripped in the middle of the road, and regained his equilibrium - you've guess who it is, I know, yes, so had I - my OH!
Today - day 1 of no more respite on anyone's horizon
He has decided not to shave again.
He hasn't had a shower for almost a week
He has tried to open another bank account to put his winnings in when he comes up on the post code lottery.( ha ha ha )
He is still peeing in the wash hand basin
He inspected a 'tee-pee' I made this afternoon to grow the sweetpeas up - and thought it was a new tree I had planted.
He decided to mow the lawn - the garden is MINE!- but encouraged him to 'help' now the lawn in completely chewed up.
wonder what tomorrow will bring??
