Ideas to help early stage dementia sufferers

Spooksss

New member
Mar 24, 2018
2
0
Hi

Apologies if this question has been asked before.
My aunt is in the early stages of dementia, her short term memory is very poor, and long term memory can be a bit scatty.

I've heard that there are simple things that can be done around the home to help her remember things like appointments, peoples names etc. My wife and I have discussed things like "memory boards" with names and photographs of relatives on them etc. White boards with appointment times, larger calendars and clocks etc etc Does anyone have any other ideas that they could share that could help?

Do you find that correcting or reminding the sufferer distresses them? I'm trying to avoid it, but occasionally (particularly when she doesn't remember someone visiting, or visiting the doctor etc) it is unavoidable.

Many thanks
 

Helly68

Registered User
Mar 12, 2018
1,685
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I think you can get a large, clear calendar showing day, date time etc. There is one in my mum's care home. We tried having instructions, names of loved ones etc pinned up in the kitchen. Not sure how much it helped. We got a gadget like a remote control, with little sensors that you stick to items. When the item (e.g walking stick) is lost, the remote can be used to locate it with flashing light and beeping from the sensor. This was useful in the care home where mummy lost her stick several times each day.
 

Norfolk Cherry

Registered User
Feb 17, 2018
321
0
There's a company where I ordered on line, three clocks, bedroom, kitchen, sitting room, that give the time in the format of eg "It's Monday Morning, 9 AM", with the date in words. One version is programmable so that visual and verbal reminders come up like "It's time to make lunch" You could add an appointment or visit, be warned I found the you tube instruction video essential. This has made a big difference to my mum who lives alone and wasn't drinking enough. I bought lots of pens, pen pots and small shopping list notebooks which are positioned in every room, by her bed, by her chair, in the kitchen, so that she can write down anything she needs me to do as she remembers it. I just go round checking them all every day and it seems to work well. Finally the diary, kept on a side table where she sits, and calendar in the kitchen have become really important. She or I tick off the days and write in events, it helps her keep track. I go for the avoiding confrontation and skirting around memory lapses approach myself! Hope this helps
 

Norfolk Cherry

Registered User
Feb 17, 2018
321
0
I think you can get a large, clear calendar showing day, date time etc. There is one in my mum's care home. We tried having instructions, names of loved ones etc pinned up in the kitchen. Not sure how much it helped. We got a gadget like a remote control, with little sensors that you stick to items. When the item (e.g walking stick) is lost, the remote can be used to locate it with flashing light and beeping from the sensor. This was useful in the care home where mummy lost her stick several times each day.
This sounds perfect. My mum has lost her pedant alarm and it costs over £70 to replace!
 

Spamar

Registered User
Oct 5, 2013
7,723
0
Suffolk
Boards were absolutely useless for OH, never bothered to read them.
A big analogue clock with a red border did work. I think he forgot the 24 hour clock. And he could see that clock!
He never had a pendant. When he went into respite they put one around his neck and said, if you want anything, just press the end. From the glazed look in his eyes I’m willing to bet he never used it!

I used to have a photography wall in the hall. As well as our wedding and his children’s weddings, I used to put photos of recent holidays, or the odd party. He asked for the children’s photos to be labelled, which was a good idea. That seemed to work, until the biggest outing was for a coffee! Furtunately, lots of coffee shops around here!
It’s really a case of what works for your pwd though. And as you know, everybody’s different!
 

Mipsydoo

Registered User
Jan 16, 2018
14
0
ive found a dermentia clock with day/date/time in mums kitchen and one placed upstairs helped but still asks me what day is when shes standing next to it. mum has a notice board and i give her the months family birthdays and appt , no more than a month as too much info stresses her out . Its a battle as what we would suggest or find helpful maybe seen as interfering or taking control ....its a battle !
 

Malalie

Registered User
Sep 1, 2016
310
0
Hello, and welcome to the forum - sorry that you have had to find yourself here.

Lots of good ideas so far. The dementia clock with the time, day and date worked well with MIL in the early days.

MIL was an extremely well organised person with a big monthly calendar, well used to keeping it in order, but as the dementia worsened, the entire house became full of notes and bits of paper with reminders. We did try at first to get bigger, clearer calendars, but she didn't know what to do with them, so we returned to the old W H Smith monthly calendar that she has used forever, and checked her 'bits of paper' , threw them away if necessary, and made sure her calendar was up to date.

Please be very cautious about discarding any appliance or thing that you Aunt has used for years, thinking that you can replace it with something simpler for her. However well meaning, it could cause her enormous problems - she will cope better with things that she knows, however awkward, old fashioned or difficult. Just my experience.

Re correcting her or reminding her about her bad memory, I think that it is far kinder not to - parts of her brain are deteriorating
and there's nothing she can do about it. Far better to enter her reality as far as you are able, and leave her feeling that she has had a happy experience being with you. The fact that she will not remember that you visited her yesterday is immaterial : I truly believe that the fact that she had a happy time is more important.

Please do keep posting - there's loads of experienced 'hands on' people her who have suggestions about specific problems that may occur.
 

john51

Registered User
Apr 26, 2014
292
0
Dunstable, Bedfordshire
I have a smart phone which my wife puts all the appointments and things in. I got a new one but couldn't work it so we went back to the old one I knew about. The alarm goes off and I look at it.
 

Toony Oony

Registered User
Jun 21, 2016
576
0
I bought Mum a TV remote control that you could programme for 2 to 10 channels. You just select and pre-programme the channels the user likes eg. BBC1; Yesterday; Channel 4 etc.
When using the arrow key to change channels, these 10 channels just keep looping, so the user doesn't get lost amidst all the channels and end up with weird and wonderful viewing from repeatedly pressing the button. My Mum managed to get a sex programme once before I bought her the new remote :eek:
I also bought her a radio which can be pre-programmed with a small selection of favourite stations (4 I think), but also has one big button with a heart on it. The heart button gives quick and immediate access to a favourite station, to make things easy for the user.
 

aliceferg

Registered User
Sep 9, 2017
17
0
what are the stages of dementia...I am not sure where my husband is at He was diagnosed a year ago but had symptoms a few years before that he is 64. He is still reasonably active and we have a Side by Side volunteer who takes him out once a fortnight which he enjoys. His everyday memory is very poor and sleeps until around 11 am and goes to bed around 10pm. He shuffles a lot and gets tired easily. The one thing that seems the strangest is that he uses his iPad to write about his childhood but he has written 75 page of the same sentence and even when he the iPad reads the text aloud for him he still continues to write the same sentence. I am not sure what stage he would be at.
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
74,001
0
72
Dundee
@aliceferg -

I always found it very hard to look at my husband's dementia in terms of stages. If you google stages of dementia you'll find a variety of different descriptions of the stages- some have 7 stages, some 5 and I saw one with 3. This is one I found which has 7 stages -
https://www.dementia.org/stages-of-dementia

I found my husband didn't fit into one stage. At the end of the day I took the decision that the stages didn't matter to me. I had a husband with dementia and had to deal with how he was on a day to day basis. Some days were up and some were down.

I wish you both well and hope you find this forum useful.