I thought we were doing ok managing dad at home. But a phone call from the police at 3am has sent me into a panic. Dad was found "out for a walk " when one of his neighbours called the police because someone was knocking on their door. He'd only walked a few doors down and then decided he'd had a long enough walk and wanted to go home. He couldn't find the way back..
Anyway, short version is he flagged down the plain clothes police car looking for the prowler (could have been anyone!) and he found his named flagged up on their system - dad could tell his name but not address.
Policeman said he'd wandered before on 5th October but as I hadn't been informed I'm wondering if this is to do with the rooftop conman rather than wandering? I'll have to check thru my old posts.
Policeman said don't lock him in incase there's a fire (obviously!!) but get a device that is triggered by the door being opened and speaks with a recorded familiar voice telling him not to leave. Has anyone had success with these? Are their any other devices which would alert me and someone else (incase I can't be reached) so we can go and retrieve him? He doesn't move fast and I live only 5 minutes away.
Another option is to lock the front door and the back gate, there are two other doors into the back garden but he couldn't get out onto the street. Thoughts anyone?
Also wondering if a clock like @Beate has is worth considering. If it said its morning in the early hours when most people are asleep it wouldn't be much good.
Hi Bunpoots. I can certainly empathise with you on this subject. My dad's also a wanderer. It started when my mum fell ill 2-3 years ago and, like you, we were alerted by the police calling at what-o-clock in the morning when my dad stopped a late-night supermarket worker to say he wasn't feeling well. He must have walked for at least a mile and a half in the dark on his own. Since then the wandering tends to be more localised and usually by the time he's outside, the cold wakes him and he realises that he's home and should be inside. Unfortunately by that time, he's left his keys inside and can't get back in, so neighbours and others have called us to get him. Poor thing is usually in tears when we get there.He has 3 exits 2 lead into the back garden and he uses the back doors more than the front when I'm not there. Generally he doesn't like the front door because the step is quite steep for him. It does worry me that I'm locking one potential exit but the key can't be left in the front door as no-one could get in if it was. Normally he can't find it!!
He doesn't smoke and the only place for a fire to stop him getting out thru the back would be in the hall if he was in bed. I think if that happened he wouldn't wake up in time. Keys are left in the back doors so that's his best bet anyway. There's nothing electrical in the hall apart from the light.
Its really hard so far mum has only wandered to fimilar places close to home, however I made some cards with all contacts on and I put them in EVERY purse/bag/pocket/ I have to check often as she tidys them up makes a pile of them and puts them "away". I have given our phone numbers to the places she wanders to , they have been very kind over itI thought we were doing ok managing dad at home. But a phone call from the police at 3am has sent me into a panic. Dad was found "out for a walk " when one of his neighbours called the police because someone was knocking on their door. He'd only walked a few doors down and then decided he'd had a long enough walk and wanted to go home. He couldn't find the way back..
Anyway, short version is he flagged down the plain clothes police car looking for the prowler (could have been anyone!) and he found his named flagged up on their system - dad could tell his name but not address.
Policeman said he'd wandered before on 5th October but as I hadn't been informed I'm wondering if this is to do with the rooftop conman rather than wandering? I'll have to check thru my old posts.
Policeman said don't lock him in incase there's a fire (obviously!!) but get a device that is triggered by the door being opened and speaks with a recorded familiar voice telling him not to leave. Has anyone had success with these? Are their any other devices which would alert me and someone else (incase I can't be reached) so we can go and retrieve him? He doesn't move fast and I live only 5 minutes away.
Another option is to lock the front door and the back gate, there are two other doors into the back garden but he couldn't get out onto the street. Thoughts anyone?
Also wondering if a clock like @Beate has is worth considering. If it said its morning in the early hours when most people are asleep it wouldn't be much good.
Its really hard so far mum has only wandered to fimilar places close to home, however I made some cards with all contacts on and I put them in EVERY purse/bag/pocket/ I have to check often as she tidys them up makes a pile of them and puts them "away". I have given our phone numbers to the places she wanders to , they have been very kind over it
My Mum ignores us when we are next to her saying don't go out the door so I agree a device like this is unlikely to work.John had a device once, placed close to the front door at an angle. If he came close it would start a recorded message in my voice telling him to stay inside as I would be home shortly. He simply ignored it and waltzed past it.
The dementia clock was a present from his kids so we didn't have to pay for it. They look lovely, but they are expensive and frankly, he took no notice of it either. He would sit in full view of it and ask me what day it was!
Hi Bunpoots,
It isn't easy trying to find ways to allow them to stay at home safely is it? Both my parents have Alzheimers but it affects them differently. My Dad has always got "cabin fever" if he's indoors too long and has a tendency to wander. He did go out one evening (we don't know when as Mum couldn't remember) and was finally found by the police at 3am. We have found a few different things that are helping us manage this.
- he has a personal GPS tracker that we put in his trouser pocket with a clean hanky every morning. It has become part of his routine - like the clean hanky - so we're lucky this works for us. I set up a zone around the house on the map and if he leaves that zone we get an alert and can see on the map where he is.
- my brother fitted motion sensors and door sensors so we can tell if he goes out a door even if he hasn't got the tracker in his pocket (no cameras)
- we have Carecall since the wander until 3am incident and the front door is alarmed and connected
- we have a keysafe fitted near the back door and Carecall have the code for it - this reassures me a little bit as I hate them being locked in at night.
- we lock the front door, and through the day the back door is unlocked but there's an alarm connected to Carecall on the gate.
Cumulatively this helps manage his wandering. With the tracker especially, if he goes out we can keep an eye and sometimes let him walk (if its dry and through the day) as he can be angry if picked up too soon. He is good at putting his coat on to go out the front door.
We're all different and dementia affects people very differently so none of this might work for you but some of it just might.
Oh and lost keys - how many? far too many. some turn up months later others never.
And that turn of speed they can get when otherwise they are slow on 2 walking sticks? Remarkable what determination and anger can achieve even through dementia.
He was suitably dressed although I suspect from what he was wearing that he had started getting ready for bed then had a "brain trump" as we call them, and became confused as to what he was getting ready for. It was raining but he was hardly wet when the police picked him up. He even had his hat on. I realise it could have been much worse.
For now we've put his shoes in the cloakroom so they don't act as a prompt for him to leave the house.
Brother thinks a mobile phone can be rigged to send a text to pre-entered numbers if the door is opened so I can rescue him from the garden if he gets the urge to wander at this time of year.
We'll need to fence off the fish pond, possibly chicken wire so he can see the fish (favourite summer pastime) but not fall in!!
Tomorrow the front door lock is being changed, it's thumb turn at the moment. Hope he doesn't decide to go for a walk tonight!
I'm making super-bunnies capes next!! They can take it in turns...