When the mood comes over me sometimes no tears

Greyone

Registered User
Sep 11, 2013
400
0
UK
Usually in the morning when I am trying to decide what I'll be doing for the day , thoughts of loss will come to me and my mood will nose dive as it did on Tuesday and this morning. Fortunately I recover and feel as new some time afterwards. But this evening as with any Thursday evening, when I have been swimming for some time , if the mood comes over my such as when I become consumed with life's unanswerable questions, I do not feel tearful at all ,merely consumed with morbid interest at trying to answer the unanswerable.

The last part of tonight I am still trying to find some kind of answer to this. Does any one have any suggestions, why no tears after a good long evening swim ?
 

pins tony

Registered User
Oct 20, 2014
213
0
bristol
I have recently took up swimming after a long break of about 5 years.i cared for my wife for over 8 years and as you know catering for someone you love not much time for you
 

pins tony

Registered User
Oct 20, 2014
213
0
bristol
I have recently took up swimming after a long break of about 5 years.i cared for my wife for over 8 years and as you know catering for someone you love not much time for yourself.my lovely wife June died in January 2017 and I have to much time for myself .if I am busy the sorrow it not to bad but like yourself after I have time to think I sometimes end up in tears.i dont know the answer to this but i just had to reply to your post.they same time heals lets hope they are right.'
K
 

DeMartin

Registered User
Jul 4, 2017
711
0
Kent
Usually in the morning when I am trying to decide what I'll be doing for the day , thoughts of loss will come to me and my mood will nose dive as it did on Tuesday and this morning. Fortunately I recover and feel as new some time afterwards. But this evening as with any Thursday evening, when I have been swimming for some time , if the mood comes over my such as when I become consumed with life's unanswerable questions, I do not feel tearful at all ,merely consumed with morbid interest at trying to answer the unanswerable.

The last part of tonight I am still trying to find some kind of answer to this. Does any one have any suggestions, why no tears after a good long evening swim ?
I think there’s something called a runners’ high. The body releases endorphins when excersised, which promotes contentment and a pleasurable feeling.
 

Greyone

Registered User
Sep 11, 2013
400
0
UK
I have recently taken up swimming after a long break of about 5 years.I cared for my wife for over 8 years and as you know caring for someone you love not much time for you
Only too well. Swiming really gives me a high. Hope it does you as well.
 

Greyone

Registered User
Sep 11, 2013
400
0
UK
I think there’s something called a runners’ high. The body releases endorphins when exercised, which promotes contentment and a pleasurable feeling.
Ah, i think I know what you mean. Maybe that is why swimming early in the morning is so popular. I wonder if they sell that stuff at Boots. Thx
 

Elaine68

Registered User
Jul 20, 2017
136
0
Sheffield
Hi how are you going ? I have not wrote you for a while hope you are managing to move on a little more now it's great when you do I am finding that out now. After doing the meditation program to stop the panic attacks I find I have moved on from them and staring to live my life and it's great I am never in now I just love everything about life.
I am not saying I have forgotten my OH but I cannot go back I need to go forward and I am sure you feel the same way enjoy your life think of your mum when you are in the garden and leave it there go inside and be you. Best wishes.
 

Greyone

Registered User
Sep 11, 2013
400
0
UK
Hi how are you going ? I have not written you for a while hope you are managing to move on a little more now it's great when you do I am finding that out now. After doing the meditation program to stop the panic attacks I find I have moved on from them and starting to live my life and it's great I am never in now I just love everything about life.
I am not saying I have forgotten my OH but I cannot go back I need to go forward and I am sure you feel the same way enjoy your life think of your mum when you are in the garden and leave it there go inside and be you. Best wishes.
Hi there. I think we've both been busy in other places. But it is good to hear from you.I'm sitting at my desk, drinking a nice warm cup-a-soup and a sarnie, just like mum and I used to do. I can see floaty bits outside so I think the snow is on the way again so no gardening for me.

I've been scanning in some family papers belonging to my uncle Jack. Paying my respects in Bath and managed to get a bunch of flowers all the way down there. It was a 14 hour day for me and I have never been so alive or happy in my life. Meeting several nice people on the way, sharing stories with one bloke who walked part of the way to the crem with me. A couple of youne=ge lads and the train stop keeping me company with stories of their adventures.

That to me is what life really is. Doing what you feel passionate about, making friends with strangers for that one time and learning what things mean. For me, the long long day with all of its delays was truly inspirational. Do you have moments like that? Nothing like that will happen to me for a long while. But I've taken to solitary Sunday walking with my camera. I bought myself a pair of those outdoor trousers so I don't mind in the least if I get wet or even very wet.

You sound like you've been doing lots of deep thought, me too. All my mum wanted at the end of her life was her house and garden and as she put it "be trouble to no one". That is my lifelong purpose too. Do you think that's OK ?. I've also got a vision and 6 goals to get me there. Friday was my 56th Birthday and I spent Saturday with someone I consider to be a good friend. I cannot think of a better time to start afresh. I've been reading a booklet called bouncing back, it's about resilience really and has 10 suggestions including things like not getting angry over trivial matters, always learning and find your purpose. I like it.

I also found a leaflet with an interview with a Dr. Alan Wolfelt, who apparently knows a lot about grief. He has some good advice and ya know it's not very often I enjoy advice but this all feels good to me like it actually resonates.

I have also learned some valuable lessons from my mum since she died, like being patient, thoughtful.

Thanks so much for getting back in touch this way, I'll be around for quite a while because this is a really nice place so don't be a stranger.
 

Elaine68

Registered User
Jul 20, 2017
136
0
Sheffield
Hi there. I think we've both been busy in other places. But it is good to hear from you.I'm sitting at my desk, drinking a nice warm cup-a-soup and a sarnie, just like mum and I used to do. I can see floaty bits outside so I think the snow is on the way again so no gardening for me.

I've been scanning in some family papers belonging to my uncle Jack. Paying my respects in Bath and managed to get a bunch of flowers all the way down there. It was a 14 hour day for me and I have never been so alive or happy in my life. Meeting several nice people on the way, sharing stories with one bloke who walked part of the way to the crem with me. A couple of youne=ge lads and the train stop keeping me company with stories of their adventures.

That to me is what life really is. Doing what you feel passionate about, making friends with strangers for that one time and learning what things mean. For me, the long long day with all of its delays was truly inspirational. Do you have moments like that? Nothing like that will happen to me for a long while. But I've taken to solitary Sunday walking with my camera. I bought myself a pair of those outdoor trousers so I don't mind in the least if I get wet or even very wet.

You sound like you've been doing lots of deep thought, me too. All my mum wanted at the end of her life was her house and garden and as she put it "be trouble to no one". That is my lifelong purpose too. Do you think that's OK ?. I've also got a vision and 6 goals to get me there. Friday was my 56th Birthday and I spent Saturday with someone I consider to be a good friend. I cannot think of a better time to start afresh. I've been reading a booklet called bouncing back, it's about resilience really and has 10 suggestions including things like not getting angry over trivial matters, always learning and find your purpose. I like it.

I also found a leaflet with an interview with a Dr. Alan Wolfelt, who apparently knows a lot about grief. He has some good advice and ya know it's not very often I enjoy advice but this all feels good to me like it actually resonates.

I have also learned some valuable lessons from my mum since she died, like being patient, thoughtful.

Thanks so much for getting back in touch this way, I'll be around for quite a while because this is a really nice place so don't be a stranger.

Hi I too love my cup a soup and a sarnie nothing better with this weather we have had snow on and off all day in Sheffield and it's so cold I have not been out today.

Sorry you have had to attend a funeral I too have got my brothers funeral this Friday which I could have done with out but I am feeling much stronger now to deal with it.

Your mum is right I don't want to be trouble to anyone neither just enjoy my life before it's too late and you do the same.

It's good to meet stranges and get talking to them the stories people have so fascinating and interesting no matter if they are young or old.

Oh Happy Birthday for last Friday as long as you enjoyed it and the company of someone you consider a good friend that is really good you do sound more positive now about things and listen to the advice it's working and I guess no one likes advice but it does not hurt every now and then.

It's my birthday on Thursday St David's Day another year older haha never mind.
Talking on here is a great place to be with lovely people that keep you going so hope we have many conversations from now on. All the best.
 

Greyone

Registered User
Sep 11, 2013
400
0
UK
Hi I too love my cup a soup and a sarnie nothing better with this weather we have had snow on and off all day in Sheffield and it's so cold I have not been out today.

Sorry you have had to attend a funeral I too have got my brothers funeral this Friday which I could have done with out but I am feeling much stronger now to deal with it.

Your mum is right I don't want to be trouble to anyone neither just enjoy my life before it's too late and you do the same.

It's good to meet stranges and get talking to them the stories people have so fascinating and interesting no matter if they are young or old.

Oh Happy Birthday for last Friday as long as you enjoyed it and the company of someone you consider a good friend that is really good you do sound more positive now about things and listen to the advice it's working and I guess no one likes advice but it does not hurt every now and then.

It's my birthday on Thursday St David's Day another year older haha never mind.
Talking on here is a great place to be with lovely people that keep you going so hope we have many conversations from now on. All the best.

Just in case you are busy, a very happy birthday for St David's day tomorrow and i hope Friday goes well for you.

Fear not I have not been to another funeral, I should have said that Jack died some time ago and very quietly. Mum and her brother dealt with everything without much disturbance for the family. But I did go pay my respects to him last year. That was important to me and a really worthwhile adventure.

Today, Thursday and Friday at Lunchtime whilst I have my cup-a-soup and watch my mother's daffodils bravely face the icy wind, I will be thinking of you. Good luck and speak soon.
 

webby123

Registered User
Mar 14, 2016
181
0
ah soup thats what i have been living on,i find with my bike rides i end up chatting to so many people its just as enjoyble as the cycling everyone has a story,currently planning to get to anglesey for easter if the snows gone by then!
the garden sounds great idea my mum loved hers working in it well into her 70s ,i grow a wildlife garden in mine every year in her honour
take care my friend
 

Forum statistics

Threads
138,149
Messages
1,993,425
Members
89,808
Latest member
ArthurPOA