Hi, I signed up to Talking Point several months ago. I've followed some of the threads, but have yet to make a post. But today has been really bad and I just need to unload, even if no one reads this I will hopefully feel better after I have set this down in writing.
My wife was diagnosed with Alzheimer's four years ago when she was 55, although it was obvious what the problem was for some time before that.
She is now 59, I am 62. I gave up work in order to look after her and was fortunate that I was able to draw a pension when I was 60.
My wife no longer enjoys any of the social activities we used to do together, she constantly complains about whatever we do. I have now got to the point where I cannot be bothered to make the effort to take her out. It seems much easier to stay at home and let her talk to herself in front of the mirror.
She has become very anti social and is extremely rude to friends and my daughters. Although she is physically fit, she can no longer speak coherently, struggles to dress herself, shower times always descend into a fierce argument when she refuses at the last minute.
I've tried to get her interested in various activities but she refuses to take part. I've finally taken the plunge and now have a carer in for two hours on two afternoons a week and use this time to go swimming.
Today we went out for a big food shop, she refused to take her shoes off when we got back, (I know this seems a very small issue but it was the last straw). We had a big largely incomprehensible argument after which I shut down and couldn't be bothered to speak other than to say her tea was ready, she spent the rest of the day sat in the bedroom talking to herself.
Tomorrow she will have forgotten all about this, I will still be full of resentment and anger. We used to have such a close loving relationship, I can't believe it has ended in this way.
I dread what tomorrow will bring but hopefully it won't be as bad as today and we may even laugh about something together.
I'm sorry for writing such a despondent first post, sometimes we have one or two days when things don't seem too bad, and I will try and reflect this in my next post.
My wife was diagnosed with Alzheimer's four years ago when she was 55, although it was obvious what the problem was for some time before that.
She is now 59, I am 62. I gave up work in order to look after her and was fortunate that I was able to draw a pension when I was 60.
My wife no longer enjoys any of the social activities we used to do together, she constantly complains about whatever we do. I have now got to the point where I cannot be bothered to make the effort to take her out. It seems much easier to stay at home and let her talk to herself in front of the mirror.
She has become very anti social and is extremely rude to friends and my daughters. Although she is physically fit, she can no longer speak coherently, struggles to dress herself, shower times always descend into a fierce argument when she refuses at the last minute.
I've tried to get her interested in various activities but she refuses to take part. I've finally taken the plunge and now have a carer in for two hours on two afternoons a week and use this time to go swimming.
Today we went out for a big food shop, she refused to take her shoes off when we got back, (I know this seems a very small issue but it was the last straw). We had a big largely incomprehensible argument after which I shut down and couldn't be bothered to speak other than to say her tea was ready, she spent the rest of the day sat in the bedroom talking to herself.
Tomorrow she will have forgotten all about this, I will still be full of resentment and anger. We used to have such a close loving relationship, I can't believe it has ended in this way.
I dread what tomorrow will bring but hopefully it won't be as bad as today and we may even laugh about something together.
I'm sorry for writing such a despondent first post, sometimes we have one or two days when things don't seem too bad, and I will try and reflect this in my next post.