invisible friends

[jennypie]

A guy who used to often chat to my oh in the pub, and hasn’t seen him fir well over a year, as his condition has deteriorated so much just took a wide birth managed a quick hello without stopping except to glance at him ... how sad and rude People annoy me so much those who used to be friends but never visit!

 

[Marnie63]

Sorry to read this story jennypie. Having a relative with dementia (in my case it's my mum) really roots out who your friends are. Over the past two years I have 'got rid' of two so called friends (one is actually a distant cousin) because of their behaviour. I don't need them, I don't miss them and I am very pleased they didn't contact me again!

We're much better off without people like these in our lives. The only defence for them may be that some people genuinely don't know how to behave or what to say (a bit like in the case of a bereavement I suppose), but even that doesn't excuse bad, rude or inconsiderate behaviour.

I now focus on those genuine friends and neighbours who care.

 

[karaokePete]

A lot of invisible friends exist and that even applies to family who say “just give us a ring if you need help” to then fade into the background until THEY want something!
However, we are never alone as TP is available 24/7.

 

[Baker17]

I totally agree people disappear fast whether they are friends or relatives, then, in my case relatives come back to object to what you’ve done causing much stres to me as I feel I’m under investigation by adult social care now

 

[jennypie]

My friends are most helpful and I’d be lost and lonely without them they go over and above so I’m lucky but just feel sad for the loss of his friends, wonder if it’s a male thing. Yes thank god for talking point

 

[Sammie234]

Its really sad how they just disappear family or rather my side of the family are great OH brothers and sister never ask after him and friends from work with whom we used to socialise just two of those stay in touch a couple of others visited just once said they would stay in touch and have never contacted again. These people had worked with him for 25 years.

 

[Duggies-girl]

My dad still has a friend who calls in to see him every now and then. I am very happy about that and he has a friend in Australia who he speaks to on the phone daily. It is so nice that they still care.

 

[dancer12]

It's so sad. I guess people just don't know what to say or do and are worried about doing or saying the wrong thing. It's sad really.

 

[Agzy]

No matter how hard we carers try it is never enough and we are lucky if we please a few of those around us now and again and never above about 25% satisfaction rate on a good day. Many so called friends and even family act as though this horrible disease is catching and we are carriers

 

[Gokwe]

My friends are most helpful and I’d be lost and lonely without them they go over and above so I’m lucky but just feel sad for the loss of his friends, wonder if it’s a male thing. Yes thank god for talking point

Hello there.
Definitely not a male thing. My wife was diagnosed with this dreaded disease some 19 months ago and now neither family nor friends give a damn.!
We still go out regularly and when we see so called friends, some of 30 years standing, they say a perfunctory hello then turn their backs and ignore her. This hurts terribly because she knows what is going on.she makes me smile because she now refers to "the witches coven"
The children, all in their 40s, send a bunch of flowers on Mothers day and no more!!
Such is life. at least we still have each other, after a fashion, for the time being.

 

[Caz60]

Same here everything changes with this illness and it hurts so much .I confronted my daughter who does put lots of hours in at work I know that but we never are included in any get together and there's no quick lunch or coffee and if they are going on a planned weekend it's all secret service.She has admitted she hasn't got time for me ,she dosnt know how hurt I am .
Feeling sad with my hubby who is loosing his communication rapidly .aah well life goes on .much love.xx