Mum has dementia and eats all the time especially at night
- Thread starter Smithy 56
- Start date
Hi Gill, welcome to TP
You're lucky getting her to eat at all, so many people on her have the problem getting people to eat anything at all.
The sense of time sometimes goes very early in a person with AZ, often it's one of the first big signs that something is wrong, mainly the issue is people going out at night thinking it's day.
My solution won't work for many people but it is that we've all been brought up by the clock from being children and it's a had habit to break.
I gave up work and just worked from home, the advantage was I could live on "wife time" not the conventional clock, we ended up shopping in Tesco at 2am some days and going to bed at dawn, other days we might be in bed at 7pm on up at 4am, I worked around her rather than trying to make her conform to the clock or conventions.
You'll never get someone with AZ to understand, you'll just keep fighting the same battle in a war you're eventually doomed to lose, why fight it, go with the flow.
Spoken by an aging hippie with a pretty poor track record for conforming to social norms.
K
You're lucky getting her to eat at all, so many people on her have the problem getting people to eat anything at all.
The sense of time sometimes goes very early in a person with AZ, often it's one of the first big signs that something is wrong, mainly the issue is people going out at night thinking it's day.
My solution won't work for many people but it is that we've all been brought up by the clock from being children and it's a had habit to break.
I gave up work and just worked from home, the advantage was I could live on "wife time" not the conventional clock, we ended up shopping in Tesco at 2am some days and going to bed at dawn, other days we might be in bed at 7pm on up at 4am, I worked around her rather than trying to make her conform to the clock or conventions.
You'll never get someone with AZ to understand, you'll just keep fighting the same battle in a war you're eventually doomed to lose, why fight it, go with the flow.
Spoken by an aging hippie with a pretty poor track record for conforming to social norms.
K
That was my mum 3 years ago, no matter how many full meals I prepared for her she wanted more. There was a time when I was leaving biscuits and a sandwich on a plate for her in the kitchen in the hope of keeping her out of the fridge in the wee small hours. Sometimes when I got up with her I would make a large bowl of porridge, this did seem to help and she would go back to bed feeling full.
Hi there Jill, sorry to hear about your mum. Can I ask do you know the exact type of dementia she is suffering from? From what you say regarding eating all the time is suggestive of frontotemporal lobe Alzheimer's type. This behaviour is indicative of being unable to recall when she last ate so the frontal parts of the brain are as a stuck record. " I have eaten. No I haven't. Yes you have." The Have not wins every time because she has hunger. What can sometimes work is high calorie high protein drinks and snacks. One or two should reduce the feeling of the hunger pains that she has. It is real. There are sometimes certain types of medication that can lower the feelings too. Believe it or not I cannot for the life of me think what it is called, because I also have frontotemporal lobe dementia. The disease is a disease of the younger age group but has a slow onset with only small differentials to the normal like forgetting a word that is needed to make a sentence comprehensible. Sometimes I have the word in my mind ready to say but it will not come out, however if there is a silence I then try to say that word and at that point it completely disappears into the middle of my brain again and is lost forever. I am 65 and after talking to my wife at length about my behaviour over the past 12 years it has deteriorated. About 5 weeks ago I was diagnosed with frontotemporal lobe dementia. I have always had a sweet tooth however my biscuit intake has increased and tomorrow I am going to give my plastic to my wife to keep safe for me as I have started to spend out on irrational items that I do not need. I am just glad that I can use a computer and am still capable of doing a small part-time job using my handy skills that I have not forgotten as yet. I am sorry if you think that I am burdening you with my problems but I am trying to help you see it from a different perspective. From the brain, memory and eyes of someone who has still got the ability to speak out about this horrendous disease. Hope that helped you a little. Oldman1952
Oldman, you write so beautifully. I read your previous reply re FTD and now this one about constant eating. You've explained perfectly what happens to my OH. He often asks me if he's had breakfast, lunch, supper. I thought it was his diabetes playing up, didn't occur to me it could be part of the FTD. And, as you say, this hunger is only satisfied by a high calorie/carb snack. The days of snacking on fruits are long gone!
Hi
Thank you for replying to me, my mum was told she had dementia than Alzheimer’s then mixed dementia. Last October she had a fall and was bed bound for three months and talking in riddles .When they came to asses her she did not get any questions right at at all she could not be bothered one bit. She told us that my mum had suffered a stoke and that the dementia was too far gone to give her medication. Three months later she was a different person she had worked so hard to get back on her feet and now there is no holding her back, only problem now is that she goes out alone and my father is 88 so finds it hard and worry’s we’re she has gone. I am new to all this and do not know what is going to happen as no one has said what stage she is at and I feel the lady who did the assessment may change her mind if ever she saw her. Sorry for waffling if there is anything you can say to helpi in anyway it would be much appreciated.
Gill 56
Thank you for replying to me, my mum was told she had dementia than Alzheimer’s then mixed dementia. Last October she had a fall and was bed bound for three months and talking in riddles .When they came to asses her she did not get any questions right at at all she could not be bothered one bit. She told us that my mum had suffered a stoke and that the dementia was too far gone to give her medication. Three months later she was a different person she had worked so hard to get back on her feet and now there is no holding her back, only problem now is that she goes out alone and my father is 88 so finds it hard and worry’s we’re she has gone. I am new to all this and do not know what is going to happen as no one has said what stage she is at and I feel the lady who did the assessment may change her mind if ever she saw her. Sorry for waffling if there is anything you can say to helpi in anyway it would be much appreciated.
Gill 56
Hi there, I have just been reading up since my last reply. I am at the moment completely confused about who's mum I am talking about. Regarding your mum's abdomen being too big? Has anyone from the medical profession seen her regarding this? I am going to talk to you about your mother's fall and when she became confused and talked in riddles. I might be able to show some light on this one. First, I am thinking why she fell and then whether or not she had a toxic confusional state that might have been why she has so many diagnosis's at first an why now so far down the road she has recovered sufficiently to go about her daily business in the way she does at present. To be honest if there was any thoughts that she had a dementia type illness, she should have been assessed in a psychiatry of older age ward to rule out things that can cause a toxic confusional state. We used to run tests, full blood screening, CT scans, MRI scans, chest x-rays, urine testing to rule out infection. Dehydration and diabetes or hormone imbalance. Not forgetting high or low blood pressure. Diagnosis of dementia is not as easy as it might sound. That's why thoughts were pointing to toxic confusional state.
Next I hope I can give you some tips on why mum's tummy is swollen?. Sometimes people have an in-diagnosed problem in the abdomen and an organ could be bleeding into the abdomen. Getting rid of fluid in the body's normal way takes a long time because the fluid is absorbed into the linings of the abdominal wall and the large bowels, then in to blood vessels and goes back to the liver, spleen and eventually goes to the kidney's to pass out of the body as urine. This problem swelling is called ascites and some times needs draining with a large cannula every time it gets to big or swollen. The other thing is if she is going out with out your dad she might be just binge eating all the time and she ends up with an enormous stomach and abdominal fats. I might have got everything wrong about both of your mother's but I think that you can pick out the bits that both suits your mothers circumstances. If I am right about your mother smithy56 please let me know and if I have got it all wrong then still let me know either way. Thank you Oldman1952
Thats exactly what i did with my wife for the last ten years and she was happy most of the time and we could talk and laugth about things sometimes sitting at tesco singing to the radio at 2 am or 4am it was good and she was smiling and singing her head off to every song some days we could be in bed from sat to mon . But then we ne out enjoying life together
Stages are fluid and not easily definable, they are also not the same for everyone and last differently according to the person. They can also overlap, so please don't focus on stages too much. I know you are looking for definitions and assurance but every person with dementia is very individual.
The best you can do for her is get in more help - she is entitled to a needs assessment by Social Services and your Dad to a carers assessment. If she wanders she definitely is at risk and Social Services have duty of care for her - your Dad should not struggle on by himself at his age.
The best you can do for her is get in more help - she is entitled to a needs assessment by Social Services and your Dad to a carers assessment. If she wanders she definitely is at risk and Social Services have duty of care for her - your Dad should not struggle on by himself at his age.
If I ask him to have her assessed he says she is alright and I know he knows she is not. My mum gets very confused now as she has eight siblings and each one makes arrangements to take her different places but I can see she wants to make decisions herself and cannot understand why people are doing this for her. My parents are bickering a bit as well at the moment as my mum says he never talks to her but I think sometimes he just wants to watch tv. We all try to help but it’s hard especially with them being old they will not part with anything so trying to tidy is a nightmare I’m sure the wardrobes will callapse with all the clothes in. I love them so much but it is hard
Gill
hi Gill
I do agree with Beate most people seem to fall within the descriptions of 2-3 stages at any one time - what's important is how your mum is being cared for, whatever her symptoms are, and that your dad isn't having to cope all on his own
for interest, maybe have a look at this site, but it isn't prescriptive, just descriptive
https://www.alzinfo.org/understand-alzheimers/clinical-stages-of-alzheimers/
I do agree with Beate most people seem to fall within the descriptions of 2-3 stages at any one time - what's important is how your mum is being cared for, whatever her symptoms are, and that your dad isn't having to cope all on his own
for interest, maybe have a look at this site, but it isn't prescriptive, just descriptive
https://www.alzinfo.org/understand-alzheimers/clinical-stages-of-alzheimers/
