Can I ... Should I?

Margi29

Registered User
Oct 31, 2016
1,224
0
Yorkshire
I know I don't put many posts at the moment, but just wanted to say your all doing a fabulous ( if that's the right word) job of caring for your mums. Dementia / Alzheimer's is such a cruel disease, stealing our loved ones!!!

I'm glad mum just thinks it's memory problems and has forgotten what the consultant told her, she often says
' people think I'm crackers !! '

At the moment the new normal for me is, yes there's lemonade in freezer, yes the remote control is hidden in a sock inside nightdress bag, yes it's just another normal day :rolleyes:

So thinking of you all, it's another day tomorrow xx
 

DollyBird16

Registered User
Sep 5, 2017
1,185
0
Greater London
I know I don't put many posts at the moment, but just wanted to say your all doing a fabulous ( if that's the right word) job of caring for your mums. Dementia / Alzheimer's is such a cruel disease, stealing our loved ones!!!

I'm glad mum just thinks it's memory problems and has forgotten what the consultant told her, she often says
' people think I'm crackers !! '

At the moment the new normal for me is, yes there's lemonade in freezer, yes the remote control is hidden in a sock inside nightdress bag, yes it's just another normal day :rolleyes:

So thinking of you all, it's another day tomorrow xx
@Margi29
Thank you for the post, you are doing a great job too.
Agree with the ‘normal’.
What is it with things being put in socks?
Take care. X
 

Sam Luvit

Registered User
Oct 19, 2016
6,083
0
East Sussex
Hi @Margi29

Our new normal, just another day in paradise :oops:, mine is lots of sleeping :rolleyes:, tip toeing around & trying not to make too much noise, while looking at all those jobs I could do :(

In between naps yesterday, I managed to put up a shelf :p , I’ve tidied the very stuffed shelves so I can now see what we have. Pity I didn’t do it sooner as I’d spent 2 weeks shopping for replacement bulbs & found 3 crammed in with tissues, insect repellent, sun tan lotion & bottles & bottles of air freshener refills???

Just another day at the office :D
 

Slugsta

Registered User
Aug 25, 2015
2,758
0
South coast of England
Evening all,

Sam, perhaps you would like to come round here and locate our lost address books?! Mum's address book has not been found since we moved. Ours seems to have disappeared more recently. There are people I should be contacting about Mum, give them some warning of what is happening, but I simply don't have the names and addresses!

We visited mum's CH today, as usual. I say that we visited the home, cos Mum really didn't engage at all. Even when I was feeding her, there was no eye contact and she would turn her head away once food was in her mouth. I'm finding it hard and admit to feeling rather impatient with her at times - when she holds the food in her mouth for ages, or chews the straw instead of sucking :oops:
 

Sam Luvit

Registered User
Oct 19, 2016
6,083
0
East Sussex
Hi @Slugsta

Lol. No chance, I have enough difficulty in finding my things, with mums tidying :rolleyes: I find other things as I put up shelves & empty cupboards. Although Mum has always stuffed things into small spaces & it was referred to as boobytrapping :D These days it’s not so funny as the things stuffed in could be fragile or very heavy, neither of which do well if they fall out :(

I typed the important addresses into an Excel sheet years ago, it made it easier when sending Christmas cards etc, so when Mum loses her address book, throws it out or starts ripping out pages (done all), I still have them. Do you have any Christmas cards or letters with some addresses? It would at least be a start & some people will have others addresses. Or, if you have some details, like town, you can do an on line search, I think Yellow Pages used to let you search 10 a day for free. Set up an account for you & a seperate one for your OH & you could double that. Just an idea for when you have a spare 5 minutes :D

Sometimes Mum will hold a drink in her mouth for ages, I don’t know why it irritates me, but it does :(, so I’ve found myself saying “swallow” rather loudly. It works, but she looks very puzzled at me o_O

Hope she engages more next time, it must be hard for you, but I do understand the frustration. We are only human Slugsta, so don’t beat yourself up :oops:
 

Sam Luvit

Registered User
Oct 19, 2016
6,083
0
East Sussex
I’m so tired .. that makes a change :D

Anyway, I’m helping a friend P to sort out her new flat, more stripping today. She’s not well, so on a Sunday I’ve taken to inviting her to dinner. It’s a “take us as you find us, pot luck dinner”, she seems to enjoy the company & as she chats with Mum, it’s helpful to me too.

I was up early as eldest was supposed to come round, but he overslept, so maybe tomorrow. Went shopping with J, she’s just started a new job :D, so was trying to juggle shopping, with half term with new job. Thought it would help her out & she’s certainly helped me in the past, so I’m no martyr, just getting in the brownie points for later :oops:

Then it was pick up P, strip more wall paper & then drop her home. Chopping, cooking, juggling Mum & food & I could sit down. Chicken thighs, vegetable bake ( it’s going down so well @HillyBilly ) & roast potatoes. I even remembered to light the candle on the table :p

Walk P home, walk the dog, stack the dishwasher & finally collapse in front of the TV. :eek:

Mums away to her bed & I get my piece of peace.

Please don’t let anything kick off too early tomorrow, I don’t think I have any reserves left. Like I said. I’m soooooo tired :rolleyes:
 

rosy18

Registered User
Jul 23, 2016
1,281
0
Blackpool
Hope by now you're happily in the land of nod Sam.
It sounds like you've had a hectic day.
Just taken Mum to the loo avoiding the commode as Mum hasn't "been" for 5 days That's nothing really for Mum but after giving her her laxido it's there and everything would be fine with just a little help from Mum but as she's totally forgotten how it all works I'm having to wait for nature to take its course but might have to use a suppository tomorrow. Mum has been anxious all day,she can sense something is there but just doesn't know what to do about it so we've paced a lot gone to go to the toilet then refused when we got there, oh please let it happen tomorrow. My life seems to be ruled by the "toilet activities ":eek::eek: At least Mum sat still whilst our Priest came round to give us communion although Mum will no longer take the host refuses point blank so she just has a sip of the wine and today she said little bits of the Lords prayer amazing really. We had to laugh though when Mum said halfway through . he's a young Man is he staying which pleased our Priest as he's 69:p:p

Slugsta my Mum seems to chew for ever as well and most of the time with her eyes closed so I sit there with spoon poised for next mouthful for ages.
It must be really hard for you when you go to see your Mum and not to get any interaction.

Hi Margi good to hear from you:D

Oh well better try and get some sleep or I might just get my grocery shopping on line done
 

Slugsta

Registered User
Aug 25, 2015
2,758
0
South coast of England
Afternoon all,

I hope everyone managed to get a decent amount of sleep. Constant lack of sleep is very hard to endure, it makes everything else more difficult too :(

Sam, thanks for the 'heads up' re the addresses. I should be able to manage some and they might help with others. I must take your example and get them onto the comp - it is ridiculous to have lost my cousin's details!
 

Sam Luvit

Registered User
Oct 19, 2016
6,083
0
East Sussex
Hi @Slugsta

I did a surprise party for my parents a while ago, so I was pinching the address books while pretending to use the bathroom & copying addresses :rolleyes:, I stuck them in an Excel sheet so I could put notes on who I’d contacted & email addresses etc. I found that lots of the people I contacted gave me more contacts, so I built on them. I’ve kept the list as it’s helped with so many more things over the years. Yellow Pages searches was helpful in tracking down a cousin who’d moved :oops:

I’m a hoarder of information :D
 

Sam Luvit

Registered User
Oct 19, 2016
6,083
0
East Sussex
Well, I woke up feeling like I’d been in the ring with Frank Bruno, no idea why, I’d not eaten anything different, definitely no dairy, but urrrgh. Long hot shower, several coffees & I made it to work. Really didn’t want to go, really wanted to crawl back into bed

However. I got a lot done & felt better for achieving something . It’s so nice to have a boss that thanks you for what you do. He noticed that I stayed later, at least an extra hour & he’s supportive. It makes such a difference :D

I’ve been waiting for a part for the motorhome, it arrived today. But the postman was too lazy to walk through the gate & ring the bell, just put the note in the box, so now I have to drive into town in the morning & find parking to collect it. Well unhappy
 

rosy18

Registered User
Jul 23, 2016
1,281
0
Blackpool
That is so frustrating Sam can you not ask to have it redelivered. Nothing seems to be straight forward does it:confused:
Had to laugh at our conversations too Sam, do you think we would know what to do in a bar or at a party Now?
One of my greatest pleasures now is knowing that Mum has "been" and all's normal no nasty smells and all washed and cleaned. I sit Mum back down and feel like I've won the lottery:D:D
Hope your feeling back to normal now and wake up this morning feeling good:p.
 

DollyBird16

Registered User
Sep 5, 2017
1,185
0
Greater London
They call me lucky.....
I read the email telling me to login the lottery has news for me. I talk to myself again “it’s too late to ring Mum and Dad, I will call with the news in the morning, who will be awake that I can tell”
I didn’t trouble anyone £3.60
I’m going for third time proper lucky! X
 

Sam Luvit

Registered User
Oct 19, 2016
6,083
0
East Sussex
Hi @rosy18

By the time I’ve asked them to redeliver & they again don’t open the gate I might as well go get it. Although, there were only 5 people in front of me, with 2 staff, it took forever .... one guy was sending parcels, each one had to be weighed, checked address, customs stickers, stamps & repeat seventeen times :confused:

Lol. Mines a double as Mum has been :rolleyes:, could get a few looks, mind you, me slumped across the table snoring might get more :D
 

Sam Luvit

Registered User
Oct 19, 2016
6,083
0
East Sussex
I don’t believe it, well I do, but, I’m almost speechless :eek:

I cleared out the fridge at the weekend, as you do, with a strange habited co habitor :rolleyes:

Anyway. I found one dairy free chocolate moose. So tonight as dinner was a bit bland, I thought I’d have that & Mum could have one of her fancy yogurt things.

It’s not there. It’s gone. She’s only blooming eaten it :( She can (& does) eat anything, chocolate, cakes, biscuits .... you know, all the yummy stuff. I have to hunt down edible imitations

I’m now craving chocolate :mad:
 

Sam Luvit

Registered User
Oct 19, 2016
6,083
0
East Sussex
Well, we ate, watched TV, then Mum was going to bed ...

I found her in the kitchen trying to make hot chocolate, heating milk & boiling the kettle & looking a bit unsure, so I eased her out the way, found the hot chocolate mix, turned off the kettle, made the drink (added some Baileys) & put it in the table

She tried it, loved it, drank a bit more & said she was off to bed. She was so sweet & loving, gave me a tender hug & went upstairs

Perfect <3
 

2jays

Registered User
Jun 4, 2010
11,598
0
West Midlands
She was so sweet & loving, gave me a tender hug & went upstairs

Perfect <3[/QUOTE]

One for the “good memory” book :)

Squishy hugs xxx