Whilst living some kind of continual dance to avoid confrontation we seem to have landed not for first time in a war zone ....
The backstory ....my mother with dementia has trapped sons finger in stairlift . He is seven . Whilst they are both at fault. Both my husband and I were more concerned with son and finger ( which is ok). She is adamant we listened to her side of events ....my husband doesn't want to hear walks off . I later listen without comment. The story is fabricated and quite frankly my son is a more reliable witness. Whilst I can see her frustration I will not be drawn into this I just say it's an accident we move on and tell my son to stay clear.
Now my mother will not use stairlift whilst son in house ( we all live in same house) . So she ventures up and down stairs which she is very unsteady on . I have told her use the lift you will fall she refuses saying it's my fault if she falls.
She tonight wants a hot water bottle but neither I or my husband do it right she wants boiling water with a loose top so she can open !!! I go up to get the bottle to do she refuses and this will necessitate another up and down trip on stairs . I say use lift she refuses and I say well you not going up and down again on foot . This necessitates supervision and takes a good 35 minutes .
So. She goes without .
What to do - constant bloody battle all unfolding with my son around and taking so much time and energy
What to do ? Leave her on stairs or keep pursuing stairlift debate or what ?
Any ideas?
The backstory ....my mother with dementia has trapped sons finger in stairlift . He is seven . Whilst they are both at fault. Both my husband and I were more concerned with son and finger ( which is ok). She is adamant we listened to her side of events ....my husband doesn't want to hear walks off . I later listen without comment. The story is fabricated and quite frankly my son is a more reliable witness. Whilst I can see her frustration I will not be drawn into this I just say it's an accident we move on and tell my son to stay clear.
Now my mother will not use stairlift whilst son in house ( we all live in same house) . So she ventures up and down stairs which she is very unsteady on . I have told her use the lift you will fall she refuses saying it's my fault if she falls.
She tonight wants a hot water bottle but neither I or my husband do it right she wants boiling water with a loose top so she can open !!! I go up to get the bottle to do she refuses and this will necessitate another up and down trip on stairs . I say use lift she refuses and I say well you not going up and down again on foot . This necessitates supervision and takes a good 35 minutes .
So. She goes without .
What to do - constant bloody battle all unfolding with my son around and taking so much time and energy
What to do ? Leave her on stairs or keep pursuing stairlift debate or what ?
Any ideas?
