Just alcohol or dementia?

[KittyCuddler]

Hello,

I'd really appreciate any advice or experiences anyone can offer.

I'm concerned about my mother and I'm unsure if her symptoms could be due to alcohol, dementia or something else entirely.

I'm in my late twenties and my mother has drank heavily on a daily basis for as long as I can remember. She has never acknowledged that she has a problem with alcohol even though many family members and doctors have said she should seek help and that her drinking is a problem.

Recently, her memory has started to become impaired. It initially started with forgetting the odd appointment and conversation here and there, but now you can have the same conversation with her multiple times in the same half an hour. The number of trips and falls she has, has increased resulting in a few trips to hospital and her appetite has changed quite dramatically. If I ask her directly about these, she always brushes it off as unimportant. I suspect a recent increase in alcohol use but I'm unsure as she always hides her empties, lies about how much she's had etc.

I'm finding it difficult to figure out if this is just a result of alcohol (and an increase in usage) or if we should be suspecting dementia due to the memory and appetite changes in particular? If so, there's no way she would acknowledge this and seek help especially as it is intertwined with the drinking and any time drinking has been brought up by a doctor she then starts to refuse care. Additionally, my mum isn't what I would consider elderly and she's below the age of 65 .

Any thoughts or experiences would be most appreciated. I have no idea what to do!

Thanks,

Kitty

 

[Beate]

It could be dementia or it could be alcohol-related brain damage. Have you heard of Korsakoff's syndrome? Here's a factsheet:
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/downl...heet_what_is_alcohol-related_brain_damage.pdf

Of course, the real challenge will be to get your mother to seek a diagnosis and treatment, and that will not be easy.

 

[irismary]

Hi Kitty, as Beate says it could be either. I think alcohol masked my husbands symptoms of Alzheimer's and I have wondered if he drank more because he was aware of what was happening and scared by it. It is going to be difficult but do try to get your mom to the doctors - I wish I had as I always think the amount he drank may have made him deteriorate. I don't mean to worry or upset you, and of course all you can do is try. I wish you well

 

[Amy in the US]

KittyCuddler, hello and welcome to Talking Point. I'm sorry to hear about your mother and this must be very stressful for you.

Not a medical expert here, and of course nobody can be diagnosed second hand over the Internet, but clearly your mother's behaviour is very concerning.

I don't know enough about alcohol use and the effects to say if what you describe, could be just down to the alcohol use, but clearly if your mum has used alcohol so heavily for so long, there can be physical problems because of that. Her history of alcohol use alone, seems to warrant a through medical evaluation.

As you probably know, dementia is not just about memory loss. There are different types of dementia and the symptoms of each, especially earlier on, can be different. There may not be any memory loss until later on in the course of the disease. Sometimes the early stages come with very subtle changes that are hard to detect.

In addition, there are other medical issues that can cause memory loss, and symptoms similar to dementia. These include, but aren't limited to, hydrocephalus, thyroid disorders, and even vitamin or nutritional deficiencies.

Ideally your mum would get a thorough medical workup to figure out what is going on with her and appropriate treatment. I recognise that it may be difficult, or impossible, to get her to agree to this. I am sorry to say it, but it may have to wait for a crisis (a trip to A&E or getting the paramedics out due to a fall or similar) for a workup and diagnosis. Should your mother end up in hospital and you are made aware of this while she is there, you could have a quiet word with the nurses/consultants/staff in the hallway about your concerns, and ask if they can help you.

If she won't go to the GP voluntarily, then some suggestions are for you to speak directly to her GP. They may not be able to discuss her medical issues with you (depending on if your mum has given them permission or if you can get this), but they can listen to whatever you have to say. Document everything that you've told us and that you're concerned about, with dates and times and specific examples if you can. Then mail, fax, email or drop that off to the GP and send regular updates. That way, they will know what is going on.

You might also ask the GP's office to call your mother in for a "routine" appointment, an annual visit, a well woman check, a flu jab, to "update their records," or whatever might work. You can even tell her it's down to that new NHS requirement that everyone go once a year or whatever you think she might accept.

None of this is easy or pleasant, and I'm sorry about the situation, and that I haven't better advice for you. I hope you can find a way forward. Best wishes.

 

[KittyCuddler]

Thank-you so much everyone for your information, advice and sharing your experiences.

I really appreciate it.