Council funded care homes

Graz M

Registered User
Apr 16, 2016
11
0
Hi,

My MIL has now got to the stage that we cannot safely manage her at home any longer as she is very frail and has problems getting up and down the stairs, (one bathroom upstairs and refuses to use a commode).

Added to that, she wonders downstairs at night and cannot get back up again. so we have sleepless nights as we try to persuade her to go back to bed. She falls a lot and is starting to be violent and threatens to hit us and throw us down the stairs, (both my wife and I have been hit).

We had our first holiday in five years last month and she went into a nursing home for a week which was partially funded by the council (50-50). we probably chose the wrong home as we had several phone calls about her behaviour and the fact that she was being segregated from the other residents because of that behaviour. It was a bit strange as the home said that it could cater for people who have dementia and it was on the list of approved care homes.

Anyway, my question is, we are not sure about the correct approach to the council to have MIL placed in a home that would be able to give her the 24 hours care that she really needs. she doesn't have enough money to pay for the care and so it would have to be 100% funded by the council.

MIL is under the memory clinic and they seem to think that we might have to consider either putting her on quite strong drugs which greatly increase the chances of strokes or consider moving her to a home. We are seeing her doctor on Friday to see what she thinks, but I was wondering what others have done in our situation and if they have any hints or tips in how to deal with underfunded councils?

Many thanks
Graz
 

Oh Knickers

Registered User
Nov 19, 2016
500
0
Hi Graz,

It sounds as though it has got to the stage where you feel you can no longer cope. Have you asked SS(Social Services) to do an assessment? That may be a first step. Write down all the things you are currently doing and be upfront that you have reached breaking point.

What I did with mother was to research the local care homes. Having avoided 'Autumn Home', 'Sunrise Home' type names it was a case of plodding through the list of homes in the area. I looked at the website (website does give a picture of the home), CQC reports and then phoned the few I thought would be acceptable. Mother does have a bit of money - but not much. So the questions was - what happens when mother's money runs out? A few said they did not take Council funded residents. A small few did. Costs ranged from £600 to £1000 a week, There was on we had, as a family liked, but that not only failed its CQC and costs are £2k a week with no dementia and they were coy about the costs with. Well, may as well ask for the moon! The result is that it has whittled down to 2 -3 care homes.

Making a decision has been helped by viewing a few homes. These ranged from the urine smelling, peeling floors ones to the really expensive one.

Be aware that care homes that take Council funded residents charge the council less as they are buying in bulk.

Best of luck
 
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canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
25,018
0
South coast
Please be aware that many care homes who say that they accept people with dementia only really mean people in early stages of dementia and once that person starts displaying typical dementia symptoms like going into other peoples rooms, being awake at night, resisting personal care and becoming aggressive, they will be asked to leave.

Expensive homes are not always the best, mums care home was not in the expensive category, was a bit shabby (though clean) and didnt have the "bells and whistles" of many of the expensive ones, but had a homely atmosphere and lovely caring staff who knew how to deal with dementia. When she first went in there she hit one of the staff and I was horrified, but they were not fazed at all and said not to worry! So try and look past the decor and look instead at how the staff interact and deal with the residents. It is also worthwhile asking at an early stage what behaviour they would not deal with.

If she is not going to be self-funded you will need to work with the social worker to get placement. Does your mum have carers coming in? If not then it is likely that the SW will first try with carers coming in 3 or 4 times a day before considering a care home.
 

SnowWhite

Registered User
Nov 18, 2016
699
0
I agree with Canary. The home Mum was in said they took people with dementia - what they didn't say was that they know next to nothing about it. They said they had "a few" in there who had dementia but I would say 95% of the rest had undiagnosed dementia.

I think people need to ask what training staff have in dementia and what courses staff have been on.

I don't think homes should be allowed to take PWD unless they have some training as it's just not fair on the resident or their loved ones.
 

Primrose19

Registered User
Nov 27, 2016
68
0
Several say they take people with dementia but they want the later stages who stay in bed. Don’t want the mobile type at all!
 

Graz M

Registered User
Apr 16, 2016
11
0
MIL was assessed by SS prior to our going on holiday and had no problems with funding then, although it might be different when looking for a permanent home for her.

As a matter of interest, my wife and I had a carer's assessment done and a few weeks later we were told that we were entitled to £10 per week each on the understanding that we were to spend it on ourselves - things like going out for a meal or cinema. We were told that it could have been £18 but as we were joint carers, we shared the load. I did ask if the council would pay for a sitting service while we did these lovely things but were told that they did not have a sitting service and we would have to pay for it!

I do wonder if some of these people live in the real world.

I have videoed a few of the situations where we were having difficulty with MIL and hopefully the SS will take into account what we show them if and when they re-assess her. If they do come, MIL will probably be on her best behaviour!

Sorry for the semi-rant, it helps to vent sometimes!
 

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