mum is drinking heavily. her dementia is more aggressive and losing weught scarily.

[guiseppie]

Hi all my name is joe. I need some help in getting help for my mum.we are in derry northern ireland. Ive contacted social services but very littlw help being offered in the short term. Im rrally concerned she wont be around long if this keeps up

 

[LadyA]

Hello Joe, and welcome.

Is your mother's GP aware of the increase in aggression, and her drinking? He may not be able to discuss your mum with you due to patient confidentiality, but he can listen to your concerns.

Depending on what your mum is drinking, is there any way you could dilute it? Other than that, as long as your mum has capacity to handle her own finances, and access to money, I'm afraid it will be difficult to stop her drinking.

 

[Shedrech]

hello Joe
and welcome to TP
what a worry - not a good mix, dementia and alcohol
have you let your mum's GP know exactly what is happening, as she is unlikely to tell the full truth so they may not be aware - and there may be meds that will help
maybe AgeUK can help
http://www.ageuk.org.uk/northern-ireland/
and there are some AS factsheets that may have useful info
NI factsheet: Community care assessment (NI418)
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/download/downloads/id/1922/northern_ireland_factsheet_financial_and_legal_tips.pdf
I'm afraid you may have to shout loudly at Social Services to get support - helpful phrases are; your mum is a 'vulnerable adult' who because of the drinking is 'at risk of harm' and the Local Authority have 'the duty of care' to support her
there are members here from Northern Ireland - might you add this as a location on your profile so that should they see your thread, they will know you need advice specific to NI
apologies for just flinging info at you
keep posting with anything that's on your mind
best wishes
PS LadyA is right - can you water down any spirits, only give her the mixer without the shot, get non-alcoholic/low alcohol lager/beer, low alcohol wine and put it in the bottle or can she usually drinks - time to get sneaky if at all possible as she isn't herself able to control her behaviour

 

[woodbrooklabs]

hello Joe
and welcome to TP
what a worry - not a good mix, dementia and alcohol
have you let your mum's GP know exactly what is happening, as she is unlikely to tell the full truth so they may not be aware - and there may be meds that will help
maybe AgeUK can help
http://www.ageuk.org.uk/northern-ireland/
and there are some AS factsheets that may have useful info
NI factsheet: Community care assessment (NI418)
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/download/downloads/id/1922/northern_ireland_factsheet_financial_and_legal_tips.pdf
I'm afraid you may have to shout loudly at Social Services to get support - helpful phrases are; your mum is a 'vulnerable adult' who because of the drinking is 'at risk of harm' and the Local Authority have 'the duty of care' to support her
there are members here from Northern Ireland - might you add this as a location on your profile so that should they see your thread, they will know you need advice specific to NI
apologies for just flinging info at you
keep posting with anything that's on your mind
best wishes
PS LadyA is right - can you water down any spirits, only give her the mixer without the shot, get non-alcoholic/low alcohol lager/beer, low alcohol wine and put it in the bottle or can she usually drinks - time to get sneaky if at all possible as she isn't herself able to control her behaviour

Hi Joe, I am in Lisburn in Northern Ireland. My Dad was always a weekend drinker but over the past couple of years and in particular the last couple of months his drinking was getting out of hand. Drinking during the day, not looking after himself, not eating, aggressive with neighbours, paranoid about me taking the deeds of his house etc. Neighbours were all very concerned about him. He was diagnosed with Alzheimers 2 years ago. I rang the GP initially who got me an emergency appointment with the psychiatrist. He advised that Dad had lost capacity. Dad was told that he may be put in hospital against his will but still reviewed all help. Rang GP and informed them. Social worker came out the next morning. Seen the state of Dad and the house. She rang the GP, got him out. They decided that Dad would be sectioned. He was taken to Antrim Hospital that afternoon and transferred to Holywell that evening. After 5 weeks of assessment, no alcohol and getting his meds sorted, he had calmed down quite a bit. They decided he needed to be in a locked care home. So I had to go round and look at some. Luckily one right beside my work and 2 mins from home had a bed available and kept it for Dad until he was discharged. He is now being looked after, fed and watered. I don't have the stress and worry of him hurting himself or starving to death. He doesn't like it, but only been there 2 weeks so early days. He is settling in slowly but surely. I was at my wits end for years with Dad. Wouldn't accept any help, take medication. Sectioning him was the worst day of my life, but I would do it all over again to know that he is safe and cared for.

 

[polly148]

Hi Joe,
Sorry to hear of your mum, I too am from N Ireland, I actually lived in Strabane but decided to move home to Cookstown when my partner was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's, I basically needed family support around me as I felt there was none for him from his family. My partner dosn't attend the doctor so I go tell him my problems. Like some one said above use the key words like "vunerable" "in danger of hurting her self" I felt under so much pressure from life's events my doctor had to listen to me. Tell them you can't cope, tell them "you need to hear me" i found talking frankly i got the help i needed for me atm. As for my partner he's very slowly on the decline
Hope this helped in some way x