When the person with dementia is confused what do they say?

[Natashat]

What does your loved one usually say? Or the person you care for? My nans is usually that she wants to go home or asks if that's her house

 

[onlyme1]

My mum asks 'what am I supposed to be doing', and 'so, what happens now?'××

 

[Natashat]

My mum asks 'what am I supposed to be doing', and 'so, what happens now?'××

Yes a lady was in hospital next to my nan constantly said that over and over... it made me so sad hearing her. Must be hard for you x

 

[Aisling]

What does your loved one usually say? Or the person you care for? My nans is usually that she wants to go home or asks if that's her house

I have been there many times. The only advice I can give is say "we will go in a little while". Try to distract with cup of tea, your house Was like that one etc. Some people refer to love lies but I don't agree with that interpretation. I studied Divinity and Theoloyy in another lifetime! In my opinion, we are not telling lies, we are entering into the the lives of people who suffer with Dem, making it comfortable for them and walking beside them.

It is sad, exhausting and difficult.

Aisling xx

 

[Natashat]

I have been there many times. The only advice I can give is say "we will go in a little while". Try to distract with cup of tea, your house Was like that one etc. Some people refer to love lies but I don't agree with that interpretation. I studied Divinity and Theoloyy in another lifetime! In my opinion, we are not telling lies, we are entering into the the lives of people who suffer with Dem, making it comfortable for them and walking beside them.

It is sad, exhausting and difficult.

Aisling xx

Thank you so much for your lovely kind words. I have tried that a few times but she keeps asking me questions. Even with the dementia she is very clued up and wants the ins and outs of everything I say

 

[caqqufa]

What does your loved one usually say? Or the person you care for? My nans is usually that she wants to go home or asks if that's her house

You can never really know what they are going to come up with. It depends in which time frame they are at that moment. Initially I used to try and give 'reasonable' answers but soon learnt to give the sort of replies you give to children - short definite and distracting. e.g. when my husband would ask for his mother (she had passed away at least 60years previous) I would say something like: she hasn't been yet, maybe she won't have time today. As Aisling said, then try and distract.
Hugsxxxx

 

[Bod]

What does your loved one usually say? Or the person you care for? My nans is usually that she wants to go home or asks if that's her house

Wanting to go "home",is often a prelude to starting to wander. This is where the person doesn't recognise the house they live in as their home, and leave to go "home".
This action may be done during daylight hours, or equally at night. Often after they have gone to bed.(Many have been found in the small hours, wearing just night clothes, in streets quite some distance away.)
They are usually confused, and it takes some time to find out who they are, and where they live.
What is meant by "home" is usually taken to mean a place where they once felt safe. Often a childhood house, but they can never explain what they mean.
Should the Police/Ambulance become involved, be sure to get an Incident Number, as this is an official record of the incident, and will help in assessing the level of care needed.


Bod
PS this is what made the decision for Father to go into Care.