The Last Goodbye

Tender Face

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Mar 14, 2006
5,379
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NW England
NuttyNan ..... however much we know the end is inevitable it is of little comfort when we realise it is coming ..... whether sooner than expected or not ..... you have always been remarkable and I know you will have the strength to come through this time ......

Love, peace and serenity are paramount at this time - and I know you have that in abundance,

With all my love, Karen, x
 

Nutty Nan

Registered User
Nov 2, 2003
801
0
Buckinghamshire
Thank you all .....

..... for your continued support!
How can something so sad be beautiful at the same time???
Friends and family, doctor and nurses, old and young are coming and going, no hushed voices, but endless exchanges of memories of past events, all the good stuff, and the not-so-good which doesn't seem to bother us now, because we've got over it.
The hugs and tears are interrupted by children's voices, and it feels almost as though we were able to hold off the inevitable indefinitely.
You will gather from this that my husband' tenacity is quite remarkable: his breathing is still regular, although he seems more distant now, but he is hanging on!
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
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SW Scotland
How can something so sad be beautiful at the same time???
Friends and family, doctor and nurses, old and young are coming and going, no hushed voices, but endless exchanges of memories of past events, all the good stuff, and the not-so-good which doesn't seem to bother us now, because we've got over it.
The hugs and tears are interrupted by children's voices, and it feels almost as though we were able to hold off the inevitable indefinitely.

Nan, your description of the scene is so beautiful. Wouldn't we all wish for our lives to end in such a way? I know I would.

Your husband is surrounded by love, and however weak he is, I'm sure he's aware of that. Yes, there are tears, because someone you love is leaving, but the love and mutual comfort will get you through it.

Love and hugs,
 

Mameeskye

Registered User
Aug 9, 2007
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NZ
Hi Nan

Just ten short weeks ago I was feeling the same as you. I wondered at the serenity yet sadness of it all.Now I look back with wonder that it could have been so beautiful. Your description sounds so much like mine at the time.

I think that for this time to be surrounded by family and friends, with love and peace is the most wonderful thing that you can ask for.

Wishing you strength and courage in the coming days

Love

Mameeskye
 

elle2

Registered User
Jun 7, 2008
13
0
cheshire
Dear nan,
Im new here and this is the first post Ive read of yours and it brought tears to my eyes. I do have to say how wonderful for him to be surrounded by the people who love him and in his own home. No one could ask for more. My thoughts are with you.
love to you and your family
elle2
 

Nutty Nan

Registered User
Nov 2, 2003
801
0
Buckinghamshire
Hard to let go

The days and nights merge into one ..... my amazing husband is still hanging on. Pain relief and sedation has been increased to keep him comfortable, but apart from the breathing, there is no other movement or sign of life.
I am torn between gratitude for this 'bonus time' and disbelief at this unusual feeling of suspense.
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
0
SW Scotland
Dear Nan

I know how you feel. You gear yourself up to face what is to come, friends and family come to say their goodbyes ...... then he carries on breathing, and you are left wondering what to do!

Just sit with your husband, hold his hand, talk to him about happy memories, and cherish this last quiet time with him.

You'll be so grateful afterwards that you had these final moments.

Love and hugs,
 

jackie1

Registered User
Jun 6, 2007
238
0
Cheshire
Dearest Nan,

You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

I hope that you continue to find the strength to go on.

Love
Jackie
xx
 

Nutty Nan

Registered User
Nov 2, 2003
801
0
Buckinghamshire
Dear Hazel,
I AM grateful for the time, but so, so frustrated that I cannot even comfort him properly now, as there is no response at all. Just the breathing. What a waste that this strong heart is forced to give up just because everything else has failed.... and how confusing for everyone for this long goodbye to turn into a repeated goodbye.
At least he is comfortable and peaceful.
 

nicetotalk

Registered User
Sep 22, 2006
155
0
stretford
Dear nutty nan

I am so sorry to hear that your husband is reaching the final stages of this dreadful illness. I lost my mum march 2006 was with her till she drew her last breath at hospital. How lovely that you are all there with him and at home i wish my mum could of been at home. Thinking of you

kathyx
 

twinone

Registered User
May 19, 2008
269
0
england
So sorry to hear your sad news, I have been in the same situation and it is heartbreaking. I felt sure that my husband knew that I was with him and that he was (and still is) loved so much. Just treasure each minute you have with him even though it is so hard.

My love to both of you

Janet
 

Taffy

Registered User
Apr 15, 2007
1,314
0
Nutty Nan said:
At least he is comfortable and peaceful.

Dear Nutty Nan,

Draw comfort knowing he is peaceful at home surrounded by the ones that love him. When my dad was dying in the hospital the Dr told me that it's not uncommon for people to wait until their alone to pass over.... I was shocked she would say that. Family gathered around dad and on his last day only I went and when I went outside briefly to grab a breath of fresh air on my return he had gone....I think he waited for me to leave the room.

A very difficult time for you and family. Caring Thoughts, Taffy.
 

katieberesford

Registered User
May 5, 2005
114
0
south wales
Dear Nan

I have followed your posts for several years now and gained much from your posts. I am so sorry to hear that things are coming to a close now. I wish you all peace and thank you for sharing the long journey with your husband with us all.

God bless - Katie xxx
 

Nutty Nan

Registered User
Nov 2, 2003
801
0
Buckinghamshire
Another morning .....

..... and still we are all trapped between life and death.
He is fading away, ever so slightly, ever so slowly.
No response at all, circulation not quite reaching extremities, but his heart is so strong and continues to sustain his regular breathing.
I have never felt so utterly helpless and hopeless.
He is calm and peaceful, I am grateful for that and for all the love and support we are both receiving.

We'll get there ..... when the time is right.....
 

connie

Registered User
Mar 7, 2004
9,519
0
Frinton-on-Sea
I have never felt so utterly helpless and hopeless.
He is calm and peaceful, I am grateful for that and for all the love and support we are both receiving.

We'll get there ..... when the time is right.....

Your words say it all.......as it is at present.

Thinking of you both so much.