We do not a LPA in place for mum we made a start with it but the solicitor us not convinced my mum is capable of making the decision and after the episode last weekend she had got worse so we have held off going back to the solicitor with the completed forms. But we need to get something in place as she is obsessed with money and when I offered to take her to the bank she refused which is not like her and said she was going on her own. Mum went from recognising I needed to have control of her finances to thinking she is capable of doing things on her own. Just dont want her to do something stupid like draw all her money out and keep it in her bungalow or carry it around with her. She doesnt like the idea of paying for the solicitor which is a lot. reading through some posts made me realise she might do something drastic . Any advice or suggestions would be most welcome
No LPA for mum
- Thread starter Spencer64
- Start date
hi Spencer64
if you honestly believe that there are moments when your mum has the (however fleeting) capacity to grasp that the POA will give you permission to help her with her affairs and to sign it, then you don't need a solicitor, you do need someone who knows your mother well, who agrees she has capacity at the moment of signing and is happy to sign the documents
https://www.gov.uk/power-of-attorney/overview
if you think that your mum no longer has capacity to deal with her affairs, then you need to apply for Deputyship and get interim permission to deal with her bank account
if the bank thinks that your mum cannot deal with her own affairs, they can (and should) freeze her accounts until someone has legal authority to manage her financial affairs
any chance of setting up a new account for your mum so that money to pay her bills can be separated and direct debits set up to cover everything, leaving only a token amount in her original account so she can take money out, but not much - this would mean her signing forms to set up the account .... maybe even have you both on a joint account so you are allowed to manage it
not an easy situation for you
best wishes
if you honestly believe that there are moments when your mum has the (however fleeting) capacity to grasp that the POA will give you permission to help her with her affairs and to sign it, then you don't need a solicitor, you do need someone who knows your mother well, who agrees she has capacity at the moment of signing and is happy to sign the documents
https://www.gov.uk/power-of-attorney/overview
if you think that your mum no longer has capacity to deal with her affairs, then you need to apply for Deputyship and get interim permission to deal with her bank account
if the bank thinks that your mum cannot deal with her own affairs, they can (and should) freeze her accounts until someone has legal authority to manage her financial affairs
any chance of setting up a new account for your mum so that money to pay her bills can be separated and direct debits set up to cover everything, leaving only a token amount in her original account so she can take money out, but not much - this would mean her signing forms to set up the account .... maybe even have you both on a joint account so you are allowed to manage it
not an easy situation for you
best wishes
This is good advice from Shadrech.
I did not have a solicitor to do the LPA. A good friend of mum signed the capacity form (mum agreed at the time). I also got 3rd party on her bank account (mum had to sign this.)
If your mum understands on a good day, in a simple way, that she will be giving you control of her finances that is good enough. You can still involve her in decisions.
Whenever mum has something to sign I try to explain it to her in a simple way so she still feels in control.
I did not have a solicitor to do the LPA. A good friend of mum signed the capacity form (mum agreed at the time). I also got 3rd party on her bank account (mum had to sign this.)
If your mum understands on a good day, in a simple way, that she will be giving you control of her finances that is good enough. You can still involve her in decisions.
Whenever mum has something to sign I try to explain it to her in a simple way so she still feels in control.
Thanks for your replies I think we are going to do it ourselves and mums friend is going to sign i thought wrongly it was more complicated and it all needed to be officially registered by a professional person. she agrees at the moment and understands basically that we are doing it for the best. And she definitely does not want to pay a huge solicitor s bill.
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If dementia is a difficult matter to discuss with your mum, it might help to talk instead about some other physical illness or a stroke which might suddenly prevent her from dealing with her money in the way she would want. I expect she wouldn't want the local council taking over or appointing a solicitor who would charge monthly fees either.
we've just done it for my parents who both have dementia. We used the GP as the certifying person and he was very understanding and helpful. Did all the paperwork myself
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LPA for mum
Hi Spencer64
Fortunately we managed all this with little difficulty but can I ask why you think your mum wants to go to the bank on her own? The reason for asking is we thought things were OK and mum at that time still lived on her own. However, when I took over her finances (she had run herself into debt) money was obviously going missing. I had some resistance but in the end I found out a 'boyfriend' - he was the same age as my partner and 20 odd years younger than mum - was fleecing her. Hence when she drew money out she did not want me around; she did not want to relinquish her cheque book, etc.
We put a stop to it (unfortunately Police could do nothing as she had parted with the money willingly).
So don't want to shove a spanner in the works or put doubts in your mind but, unfortunately, you have to keep an open mind on what their motivation for doing things (or not) might be.
Hi Spencer64
Fortunately we managed all this with little difficulty but can I ask why you think your mum wants to go to the bank on her own? The reason for asking is we thought things were OK and mum at that time still lived on her own. However, when I took over her finances (she had run herself into debt) money was obviously going missing. I had some resistance but in the end I found out a 'boyfriend' - he was the same age as my partner and 20 odd years younger than mum - was fleecing her. Hence when she drew money out she did not want me around; she did not want to relinquish her cheque book, etc.
We put a stop to it (unfortunately Police could do nothing as she had parted with the money willingly).
So don't want to shove a spanner in the works or put doubts in your mind but, unfortunately, you have to keep an open mind on what their motivation for doing things (or not) might be.
I did my mum's POA paperwork myself as her finances were straightforward. I asked the organiser of the lunch club she had gone to for many years to certify, and her oldest friend from childhood was notified. I chose a morning when mum was alert and cheerful for her to sign and a neighbour witnessed her signing.
You can do it all online now and only need a as solicitor if your mum's finances are complicated.
You can do it all online now and only need a as solicitor if your mum's finances are complicated.
