Hi Trisha4
As you can see by all the responses, you are not alone and we all understand the need to express your feelings.
My wife has FTD and we are both 66. I took voluntary retirement at 59, with the intent that we could have more holidays abroad, travel around the UK and enjoy our retirement.
If I am honest, the signs of her illness were there even then, but we all put it down to senior moments, stress etc. I was busy helping renovate our two son's houses and by the time I'd got most of that out of the way (you never really stop?), she was already becoming more inward, less confident and more anxious.
It took another year or so before I finally managed to get her to see our GP and along the route of the memory clinic, scans and diagnosis in Jan 2014.
happy in her own little world but like you, I miss the love and affection, and someone to share things with. I've somewhat neglected the inside of our house (I do keep it neat, clean and tidy), as I don't seem to have any motivation, plus it was always my wife who had the drive and eagerness to improve and change.
The best thing I did was to develop a social life for the both of us, when I first noticed things declining. She was never a pub person but I managed to get her to go to a local venue that had great music on every Friday night. We also started popping in to a pub in the town that her brother used (following the death of their mum, we were a bit worried about him as he's a bit of a loner). We got to know the regulars who understand her condition and have become good friends, so it is a bit of an oasis for us.
I hope you find that this forum and the virtual hugs comforting.
Best wishes.
Phil