Thank you everyone for your replies. She's asking family members behind my mums back about the items..accusing my mum. My mum is really upset. We keep chucking the paper away as it's like a reminder every time she goes into the kitchen and sees it. But she keeps writing the same things every day
Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
Hello Megan, it's not unusual for people with dementia to accuse others of all kinds of things. Often they accuse carers/relatives of 'stealing' when really they've either hidden things and forgotten where they are, or they remember things from the distant past which in reality they haven't had for years.
It's pointless trying to reason or argue with someone who has dementia it's far better to either distract them or make gentle ok noises.
More important is that the relatives to whom she's complaining understand that this is often a part of the disease and not real. Otherwise it's too distressing for your mum.
My mother used to write horrible notes about me accusing me of plotting to put her in a care home which was a bit rich seeing as I am the only person keeping her out of a home.....
She once stood in front of our house yelling that my 9 year old granddaughter and I were trying to kill her and we were torturing her. Luckily our neighbours know the score, have mostly encountered dementia before and just giggled.
Hopefully your relatives aren't taking these notes seriously but you could point them at this site to have a read if it helps.
Your poor nan is expressing her 'loss' of herself really and it's hard, not only for her but for those who care for her.
My mum doesn't do this anymore so hopefully your nan will eventually stop too. Was she a journalist or a secretary when she was younger? It's amazing she still remembers her shorthand.
Perhaps you could find some photos from the past and make her a picture book.
