Dad deteriorating every time I see him

[hroberts]

Hi

I am new to this forum and just thought I would post and say hello and tell people about my situation. My dad has been slowly getting worse since my Mum passed away in January 2015, he has finally been diagnosed with dementia but I am unsure which type.

He used to live with his brother but he struggled to cope and had to move to a care home last August, he was admitted to hospital in December as he was dehydrated and had really bad pressure sores, at one point in hospital his kidneys were failing, but he has had incontinence issues for a long time.

He is now in a nursing home and he has not moved out of the bed since he was admitted to hospital so some 6 weeks now, he is really confused and sometimes struggles to recognise me, he thinks he is getting out of bed and moving about but he isn't. He is eating some things but only if they are the right meal! He gets obsessive about things and tasks that he thinks he should perform.

I just wondered what stage he was at really, I visit maybe 1 or 2 times a week and he seems to be different every time and getting a liitle bit worse quite quickly.
It is really difficult to cope with and I hate seeing him like this.

Any help would be appreciated.
Thanks

 

[minniemouse01]

hi, it is always good to post to others who have experience in everything you are going through. Dementia of any kind is relentless and I know my Dad is different every day. (vascular dementia diagnosed nov 2012. ) He is being cared for and that, I think, is the main thing. I wish you strength for the road ahead.x

 

[LadyA]

Hello, hroberts. Welcome to TP.
It's quite probable that the trauma of losing your mum may have caused a deterioration in your dad's condition. The stay in hospital will also have been very disorienting for him, and unfortunately, this too can lead to a progression of the dementia. The unfamiliar environment, staff and routine will have been very confusing for your dad. It will take a little time for him to settle in the nursing home. Hopefully, as he does, he will start eating more.

Sent from my Moto G Play using Talking Point mobile app

 

[love.dad.but..]

After my mum died suddenly at home dad declined dramatically his GP felt because of the shock and trauma. After 6 months in a NH he had to spend 10 days in hospital having an emergency operation and that also affected him. However he gradually started to eat more and settle back down until the illness moved him into more decline. I hope your dad starts to settle as it must be such a worry for you but he is being well cared for. Sometimes when I see my dad I think he seems worse than the day before but just as this rollercoaster illness can do, he then seems to pick up a bit the next day.

 

[pamann]

Hello hroberts

Welcome to talking point, l know how upsetting it is for you, to see our loved one suffering with this awful disease.
We have to try to prepare ourselves for decline, l find it so difficult my beloved husband is in a CH, all you can do is be there as often as you can, he will know you are there, even when you think he doesn't. My husband sleeps most of the day now, l still sit with him for a few hours, and feed him when he wakes.
My thoughts are with you try to stay strong.

 

[hroberts]

Thanks

Thanks for commenting it is good to know I am not alone.