Feeling a little blue

oilovlam

Registered User
Aug 2, 2015
386
0
South East
Feeling a little trapped, getting a little blue. Stopped saying hello to the neighbours because they don't say hello to me.

Perhaps it's the Christmas season. Everyone's going out for Turkey dinners but I don't know of any in our area. Thinking about not sending any Christmas cards. Raising the drawbridge, switch off the phone and go to bed until it's next year.

Don't feel like I'm getting any help.....could be that I'm not very good at asking for it. My brother comes round and sits on the sofa like he is glued to it. In the past when I've complained he says I need to draw up a list. I don't bother now. Just let him feed mum & change her pad whilst I work through my list of 'imperative' things to do (gardening, fencing, shopping, banking etc).

Could be that dad died a while back and I'm just feeling a little blue because I'm missing the old guy. Hopefully I'll buck up a bit before Xmas.

Need to start saying hello to the neighbours again.
 

Lavender45

Registered User
Jun 7, 2015
1,607
0
Liverpool
I'm so sorry you feel blue, Christmas is full of joy and socialising for many, yet for us carers it seems a lonely time, I think it highlights the difference between our lives as carers and those of our friends and neighbours. I think everyone on TP will understand. Sending you a big (((hug))) in the hope it helps a little. Xxx
 

Digilux108

Registered User
Nov 7, 2016
45
0
Essex
Feeling a little trapped, getting a little blue. Stopped saying hello to the neighbours because they don't say hello to me.

Perhaps it's the Christmas season. Everyone's going out for Turkey dinners but I don't know of any in our area. Thinking about not sending any Christmas cards. Raising the drawbridge, switch off the phone and go to bed until it's next year.

Don't feel like I'm getting any help.....could be that I'm not very good at asking for it. My brother comes round and sits on the sofa like he is glued to it. In the past when I've complained he says I need to draw up a list. I don't bother now. Just let him feed mum & change her pad whilst I work through my list of 'imperative' things to do (gardening, fencing, shopping, banking etc).

Could be that dad died a while back and I'm just feeling a little blue because I'm missing the old guy. Hopefully I'll buck up a bit before Xmas.

Need to start saying hello to the neighbours again.

I understand what you are going through. I really do. My mother sadly passed away in August this year. Her birthday comes up on 17th December and then of course, Christmas and the NY. All in all, I don't feel like celebrating much, but will do my best to be as upbeat as I can.
 

cragmaid

Registered User
Oct 18, 2010
7,936
0
North East England
Speak to the neighbours, talk to the Postie, talk to the TV and Radio ( although they don't answer either;)) but keep talking. Don't cut yourself off. You do, however sound quite depressed and I suggest that you talk to your GP about medication of counselling which may help you feel better.
 

theunknown

Registered User
Apr 17, 2015
433
0
I do feel for you. It seems as if everybody is celebrating at this time of year, but there must be loads of people who aren't. As Cragmaid suggests, I talk to the television. More importantly, I talk to my dog. He has no idea what I'm on about but he desperately tries to understand. I feel bad for confusing him (because he can't understand) but at least we're communicating. We want to understand each other, and that's what counts, even if we're both frustrated.
 

Bill Owen

Registered User
Feb 17, 2014
182
0
71
BRIDGEND
Cwtch

feeling a little trapped, getting a little blue. Stopped saying hello to the neighbours because they don't say hello to me.

Perhaps it's the christmas season. Everyone's going out for turkey dinners but i don't know of any in our area. Thinking about not sending any christmas cards. Raising the drawbridge, switch off the phone and go to bed until it's next year.

Don't feel like i'm getting any help.....could be that i'm not very good at asking for it. My brother comes round and sits on the sofa like he is glued to it. In the past when i've complained he says i need to draw up a list. I don't bother now. Just let him feed mum & change her pad whilst i work through my list of 'imperative' things to do (gardening, fencing, shopping, banking etc).

Could be that dad died a while back and i'm just feeling a little blue because i'm missing the old guy. Hopefully i'll buck up a bit before xmas.

Need to start saying hello to the neighbours again.
ok first big cwcth ok .yes it is hard feeling like you on you own .lost my wife in march this year from lewy body dem.first cristmas on my own with out her .feel low my self .got two daughter and grand childran.to help me .some time i fine looking back over life can also bring you down has you want them back .im going througth a tuff time my self .like you i did evry thing for my wife felt alone at time .it will get better over time .keep strong .once again big cwcth from me .bill
 

Pegsdaughter

Registered User
Oct 7, 2014
128
0
London
I do feel for you. My oh died suddenly in May and I am plastering on the smile and the false hail fellow well met attitude When asked how I am. His birthday was in November at the same time as poppy week and was so hard and I am dreading Christmas as its the first time in 49 years we have not been together. But do say hello to people as even a smile and a quick response makes one feel a bit better and gradually life will move to a better place.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
 

oilovlam

Registered User
Aug 2, 2015
386
0
South East
Darn....I was writing a long reply and it disappeared...how annoying....deep breath and try again....abridged version.

Thanks for the thoughts and hugs. Even the cwcth (which I think is welsh for a cupboard or a cuddle)....when can I expect the cupboard?

Christmas is a tricky time with the expectation that you should be enjoying yourself. Their is also the pressure that everything should be perfect. I think this year I'm gonna lower the bar and settle for 'sufficient'.

A pet would be good...something to focus attention on...but dogs are expensive and we have enough cats in the area. I toyed with the idea of 'borrowing' a dog from someone who works (there are websites that match people with dog owners). Funny this is (not funny at all really) my sister has a dog and I hinted that she could leave it here on her way to work....she never did. I think she was worried that we would teach its bad habits....like staying off the furniture (they want a free spirited, go everywhere, rule the roost gun dog).
Not sure about medication or counselling. But I suppose I may not be the best judge of that.
Cancelled dad's newspapers which was probably a mistake. I wasn't always reading that things but they did allow me to keep in touch with what is happening in the world. Sometimes it's good to know that your problems don't amount to a hill of beans.

Had a good day in the garden on Tuesday. Cleared up the leaves....chopped back some shrubbery....I'm hoping that it will survive because I think I was a little severe. But it was good to touch soil....although as usual I did get a thorn on my finger.

Christmas cards next. Then dust the living room. Paradise is hard work!!
 

jennypie

Registered User
Jan 5, 2014
126
0
North yorkshire
Your not alone I also could hide under the duvet or escape to an isolated cottage until it's all over! I can get out fir short periods and walking the dogs help but feel very emotional and can burst into tears at the drop of a hat think that's really tiredness as my oh has been up a lot at night which doesn't help matters. The thoughts of getting the Christmas tree out and moving all the memorabilia scattered arround where it will go yikes!!
 

smartieplum

Registered User
Jul 29, 2014
259
0
Your not alone I also could hide under the duvet or escape to an isolated cottage until it's all over! I can get out fir short periods and walking the dogs help but feel very emotional and can burst into tears at the drop of a hat think that's really tiredness as my oh has been up a lot at night which doesn't help matters. The thoughts of getting the Christmas tree out and moving all the memorabilia scattered arround where it will go yikes!!

I can relate. The isolated cottage sounds so inviting.:)