Calculating Cost/charges

Eviejt

Registered User
Dec 2, 2014
15
0
Hi everyone. Sorry in advance for the long post. :eek:

I was supporting a man (my deceased mothers fiance who has always been part of my family) with dementia, he was in his own home for 3 yrs. I would visit often (6 buses per visit) and he would also visit with me for a few days at a time for laundry and bathing needs which he wouldn't do at home.

I became his appointee approx a year before he lost his independence - on the advice of the assessor as the person responsible for that money I received all his benefits into an account I set up in my name specifically for his pension and AA. He refused all attempts to arrange formal help for him but he told me to have the AA for the time and energy I was giving to support him. I erred on the side of caution and only ever paid for travel expenses and meals (I also contributed to this out of my own pocket) etc out of this money (which he thought was coming out of his pension), the money is still in my account.

During this time I also had expenses in my home which I didn't recover eg removal of a hand basin from his room, damage and loss of various items in the house.

He came to live with me when he could no longer stay at home and was with me for approx 2 months and was very happy and keen to stay, it was hard work as I'm sure most of you know but he and I were both "safe". Aside from expenses for day centre and specialist transport, I split all shared food and travel costs equally and paid one bill approx £200 towards care and house hold costs.

His step sister who had no interest in him until he lost capacity for finances got involved and he was removed from my care and placed in a home costing £900 per week. The staff were told not to give me any information. The poor man was then sectioned after 2 escape attempts and has been moved 4 times without anyone letting me know - he is now as far away from me and the family as it is possible to take him without changing health authorities, he doesn't have visitors. The social health person in charge of his case has never been in touch and won't return my calls. To add insult to injury on finding out that he had chosen to involve me in his finances she accused me of theft. SC spent 10 mnths investigating and completely cleared me of any wrong doing. Aside from providing information pertinent to the investigation and her COP application I have not commented on cost/money in accounts owing to me but advised I was waiting for info from SC regarding the matter. I haven't worked in 2 yrs because of stress the last 11 months of which were not because of caring for my stepfather but because of her actions.

Her solicitor requested info for the COP application some time ago but the step sister has not made any contact with me to apologise or discuss finances (the solicitor said he wasn't acting when I contacted him, though has now said I can communicate with her via him).

I was advised both on here and other agencies to produce a "bill" for everything. I have never expected payment, and was resistant to have him pay for costs to my house etc because I considered him family and financial gifts he made to me were banked by me (into my and his joint accounts) for transparency and until I could be sure of the implications of such gifts.

Now the investigation is complete and my honesty is not in question I am ready to put that list together. Partly to make it known exactly what I HAVEN'T taken but also because I am in no position to be as charitable as I would have liked to be, and given what he is paying in legal fees and private care he would't want me to be anyway.

I will be including a 0 value for stress and loss of earnings because of the baseless accusations - ;) they're not his responsibility :D but am wondering what else is reasonable to include.
 

Pickles53

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
2,474
0
Radcliffe on Trent
It would be reasonable to claim all direct expenses arising from his living with you, (eg any additional furniture or repairs/adaptations to the house)plus a share of all ongoing household costs eg food, utilities, telephone bills and accommodation. Also council tax unless you claimed the SMI exemption on his behalf. Hopefully you can evidence these in some way eg with receipts, bills.

If he is self-funding his care home costs, it's going to add up to a lot less per week than the fees. Any expenses you don't deduct from his assets will end up being paid to the care home until his savings get down to the level where LA funding kicks in, so don't feel guilty. You've given him a huge amount in time and care and you shouldn't be out of pocket financially as well.

PS if anyone questions the amounts, tell them what the local hourly cost of at home care visits would have been if you'd hadn't been his carer.
 
Last edited:

Shedrech

Registered User
Dec 15, 2012
12,649
0
UK
hi Eviejt
Pickles53 has given a thoughtful response
personally, I'd account for absolutely anything you can think of - certainly everything you have paid for which was for his individual use/personal benefit - half of anything you paid for which was actually shared - all repairs/breakages/alterations - equipment bought, services paid for - expenses for each appointment to which you accompanied him - washing power etc used for his things ...
seems to me that you are unlikely to be 'offered' more than you 'claim' for - and it's important that the step sister and her solicitor realise how much it actually cost to support her step brother (and how 'cheap' your care was compared to paid care at home or 24 hour care from an agency); now is no longer the time to be cautious
best wishes
 

Eviejt

Registered User
Dec 2, 2014
15
0
Thanks for your replies. :)

I dithered a bit but put the list together and sent it - just waiting for a reply. Hopefully they will give it reasonable consideration and we can come to an amicable agreement because I'd rather not have to ask the COP to make the judgement on it.
 

Eviejt

Registered User
Dec 2, 2014
15
0
Still in discussion about this and not getting anywhere.

It seems that the basis of the problem is that the solicitor has incorrectly assumed that all monies in 3 accounts, 1 of which is in my name alone and 2 I am joint account holder belongs to my step father. In reality some of the funds are mine and I can provide evidence of this.

I will apply to the COP on the matter should it come to that but can anyone advise me of the legal term in applying for a second judgement?
 

Jessbow

Registered User
Mar 1, 2013
5,677
0
Midlands
NEVER mix your monies! Bit late for that I guess.

not quite sure why you have sent details of an account in your sole name if its your funds?

You are ( obviously) going to prove what monies are your- not going to be easy
 

Eviejt

Registered User
Dec 2, 2014
15
0
NEVER mix your monies! Bit late for that I guess.

not quite sure why you have sent details of an account in your sole name if its your funds?

You are ( obviously) going to prove what monies are your- not going to be easy

It was his attendance allowance which he instructed me to have as the person supporting him and costs which I didn't recover at the time.