Last week my father passed away. We buried him on Saturday. In the end his heart disease got him before dementia completely took him from us, which was a blessing really.
Thank you for all your help and advice. It was a great encouragement in the fight to give dad dignity and care.
I feel like an old hand now. We went from naively applying for care, to fighting them on the beaches in the space of a year. We have had very poor care at home, bad respite care, he's been thrown out of a nursing care home after we were forced to sell the house to pay for it! We've had to get him out of a hospital against the wishes of the SS, who though it best just to lose him somewhere in another county. Finally we managed to buy another home for him and install our own carer who was an angel. The last three months were good for dad, "i'm so lucky" he would say, but what a struggle. And it was only 14 months. Respect to you long servers.
Lessons?
Listen to yourself. You probably know best, and if you are prepared to fight you might just get it.
Nobody loves or cares for your mum/dad/wife/husband like you do, whatever they say.
fight.
Know that it will take most of your time and you will have to rearrange your life.
fight.
Try not to lock everyone out of your life. Your friends don't understand, but that doesnt mean they don't care, and you wiill need them.
Don't drink too much.
fight.
one day it will change, and we will value our old people.
Love Frazer
Thank you for all your help and advice. It was a great encouragement in the fight to give dad dignity and care.
I feel like an old hand now. We went from naively applying for care, to fighting them on the beaches in the space of a year. We have had very poor care at home, bad respite care, he's been thrown out of a nursing care home after we were forced to sell the house to pay for it! We've had to get him out of a hospital against the wishes of the SS, who though it best just to lose him somewhere in another county. Finally we managed to buy another home for him and install our own carer who was an angel. The last three months were good for dad, "i'm so lucky" he would say, but what a struggle. And it was only 14 months. Respect to you long servers.
Lessons?
Listen to yourself. You probably know best, and if you are prepared to fight you might just get it.
Nobody loves or cares for your mum/dad/wife/husband like you do, whatever they say.
fight.
Know that it will take most of your time and you will have to rearrange your life.
fight.
Try not to lock everyone out of your life. Your friends don't understand, but that doesnt mean they don't care, and you wiill need them.
Don't drink too much.
fight.
one day it will change, and we will value our old people.
Love Frazer