A new stage in my life...................
- Thread starter Grannie G
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I think perhaps it depends how close the end is and how Helen is.
If It means that she will be more calm and less stressed at home, it should be better for her but if she has to suffer pain or discomfort for any time, then not so.
It must be hard to refuse anything Helen wants at this time but having Helen at home will probably be more difficult for Martin and Mandy.
You are the one who knows though Sylvia, so I share your concern.
If It means that she will be more calm and less stressed at home, it should be better for her but if she has to suffer pain or discomfort for any time, then not so.
It must be hard to refuse anything Helen wants at this time but having Helen at home will probably be more difficult for Martin and Mandy.
You are the one who knows though Sylvia, so I share your concern.
Sylvia, you are much closer to the situation....but I too, am concerned. It is almost a basic instinct, to return to ones nest, den, lair, home.....to hide away to await death. It is putting a huge pressure on Martin and Mandy, who I understand, naturally want to make this stage as comfortable for Helen as possible. They want to help to make things easier, and Helen wants things to be easier, but she also wants to control it all....and quite simply, she can't. She requires constant supervision and constant changes to her medication for pain relief and the like and she cannot have this on tap at home. The system just does not work in this manner. In practical terms the nurses, doctors and drugs have to be summoned each time, which means they take longer to put relief in place.
One day soon, Helen's troubles will be over, but her carers, her family and friends will be left feeling that they have failed her.......and they have not. It is only her own body that has sadly failed her. Tragically, that knowledge will not make them feel better.
One day soon, Helen's troubles will be over, but her carers, her family and friends will be left feeling that they have failed her.......and they have not. It is only her own body that has sadly failed her. Tragically, that knowledge will not make them feel better.
I could not get here earlier and then when I did, such sad news to read. We all know as does Helen the inevitable, but I share the fears concerning her going home.
The main thing is that her pain and discomfort is well controlled, and hopefully anxiety. If that is possible at home then her desire to die at home is the best decision for her. But it is .an unknown area….
I hope and pray Helen finds peace and comfort and that Martin and Mandy can keep their strength up during this profoundly difficult time for them. Hard for everyone who knows and loves Helen. Including you Sylvia, an exceptional friend to Helen.
Loo xxx
The main thing is that her pain and discomfort is well controlled, and hopefully anxiety. If that is possible at home then her desire to die at home is the best decision for her. But it is .an unknown area….
I hope and pray Helen finds peace and comfort and that Martin and Mandy can keep their strength up during this profoundly difficult time for them. Hard for everyone who knows and loves Helen. Including you Sylvia, an exceptional friend to Helen.
Loo xxx
I'm so sorry for all that Helen, her family, and you are going through. Thinking of you all at this incredibly difficult time xx
Sylvia, I'm so sorry to read the latest news about Helen.
Many years ago (2006) just as Pete was becoming ill, my very good friend died after a long battle with cancer. She was a superstar
I said my goodbyes when she was in Hospital and nothing was left unsaid. I started my grieving a year before she passed when she was given the prognosis that her cancer had spread and she didn't have long. When she did eventually pass I felt strangely calm as, like you, I was resigned to the inevitable.
I hope that all of you can find peace in having left nothing unsaid but, most of all, I can only hope that Helen finds some peace wherever she ends her days.
Poor dear Helen, Martin and Mandy; sometimes life can be so unfair. And what of you Sylvia? You are a dear friend of the highest order.
Love,
Lyn T XX
Many years ago (2006) just as Pete was becoming ill, my very good friend died after a long battle with cancer. She was a superstar
I said my goodbyes when she was in Hospital and nothing was left unsaid. I started my grieving a year before she passed when she was given the prognosis that her cancer had spread and she didn't have long. When she did eventually pass I felt strangely calm as, like you, I was resigned to the inevitable. I hope that all of you can find peace in having left nothing unsaid but, most of all, I can only hope that Helen finds some peace wherever she ends her days.
Poor dear Helen, Martin and Mandy; sometimes life can be so unfair. And what of you Sylvia? You are a dear friend of the highest order.
Love,
Lyn T XX
Along with other TP members, my thoughts and prayers are with Helen tonight, and her family.
Thankyou Sylvia for keeping us updated.
With love xx
Thankyou Sylvia for keeping us updated.
With love xx
Waiting for the inevitable is so difficult.A horrible mixture of wanting it to be over to end the suffering and praying it never happens.I also felt calm when my sister died,she had been through such a lot and borne it so bravely.But she had to leave her beloved little girls behind,heartbreaking.
Oh Sylvia, I do hope it won't be too hard for them all, and Helen can get pain relief as she needs it. You must be having very mixed feelings.....Lets hope the hospice knows best....
I just hope the spiritual comfort Helen gets from being in her own home outweighs any physical discomfort. And spiritual peace is a very powerful thing.
Peace to you too, Sylvia, and Martin and Mandy. X
Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
Peace to you too, Sylvia, and Martin and Mandy. X
Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
I'm so glad Helen is finally home.
Thinking of them all
Thank you for keeping us informed Sylvia, you are such a good friend
Thinking of them all
Thank you for keeping us informed Sylvia, you are such a good friend
I'm glad Helen is home as that is what she wanted. I hope they can keep her comfortable.
Thinking of you Sylvia
Kim xx
Thinking of you Sylvia
Kim xx
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