My 87 year old mother in law (whom I live with) has had dementia for a couple of years now. It's got to the point where she collects kitchen roll sheets and toilet toll sheets in a box. She always has some tissue in her hands or pockets. She usually just takes it straight off the roll and throws it straight in the bin! It's costing a fortune - 9 rolls every 2-3 days. Also she constantly runs the taps and throws 2-3 jugs of water down the toilet before flushing it (even if she hasn't been to the toilet). I am at my wits end. Her actions wake up the family at night and she seems exhasted by her constant trips to the kichen and bathroom. P.S. She has got bladder problems but wears continence products which carers change 3 times a day (she has been recently tested for a uti but is clear). Any advice would be greatly appreciated as my husband and I are close to breaking point. We find it so hard to explain the behaviour to our 3 year old - who has started to copy my mother in law's actions because she thinks it's funny.
Water and tissues obsession
- Thread starter redsky1977
- Start date
No bright ideas, I'm afraid - just wanted to empathise. My mum also has an obsession with tissues. We have boxes all round the house and she always fills her pockets with them or puts them under her pillow at night - then throws them out later on because they are screwed up. I'm thinking of buying shares in Kleenex! 
Could you perhaps put kitchen roll and tissues out of her sight/reach?
I suspect that there is a connection between the anxiety of continence problems and the use of tissue material. It does seem to be a recurring theme on TP.
I do sympathise, especially as this is happening in the night too.
I suspect that there is a connection between the anxiety of continence problems and the use of tissue material. It does seem to be a recurring theme on TP.
I do sympathise, especially as this is happening in the night too.
Yes my mum also has an obsession with tissues. Currently getting through a box in 1-2 days, luckily the Kleenex tissues she uses are currently on offer at Tesco for £1 a box so stock piling . This has become worse since mum lost her sight and mobility plus with the dementia she is in constant fear of not having a tissue. Therefore she folds or rolls up about ten new tissues into her sleeve of her cardigan and then later says that they are old as they are creased up . I think it is also where it is something that she can still do where all of her old pastimes have ceased (cooking, reading, gardening, knitting). She refuses to listen to music, radio or audio books.
. This has become worse since mum lost her sight and mobility plus with the dementia she is in constant fear of not having a tissue. Therefore she folds or rolls up about ten new tissues into her sleeve of her cardigan and then later says that they are old as they are creased up . I think it is also where it is something that she can still do where all of her old pastimes have ceased (cooking, reading, gardening, knitting). She refuses to listen to music, radio or audio books.Thanks
thanks for all the replies, I now know I'm not the only 1 going through this. Mother in law has just finished all the kitchen towel ( there was 1.5 rolls there this morning!). i agree that it might be because she is now unable to do her old hobbies such as sewing, cooking, shopping etc. Also she cannot speak English, cannot read, or write so even though she watches Asian tv she gets bored of that easily. She's just admitted to me that she often uses the tissue as well as continence products. When I told the lunchtime carer just she just said 'it's habit'. I am thinking of hiding the water jug and only putting out 1 roll each day. Worth a try. Oh and Mum just said 'Sorry' to me but she'll not remember that and will be collecting tissue again after her lunch I'm sure!
thanks for all the replies, I now know I'm not the only 1 going through this. Mother in law has just finished all the kitchen towel ( there was 1.5 rolls there this morning!). i agree that it might be because she is now unable to do her old hobbies such as sewing, cooking, shopping etc. Also she cannot speak English, cannot read, or write so even though she watches Asian tv she gets bored of that easily. She's just admitted to me that she often uses the tissue as well as continence products. When I told the lunchtime carer just she just said 'it's habit'. I am thinking of hiding the water jug and only putting out 1 roll each day. Worth a try. Oh and Mum just said 'Sorry' to me but she'll not remember that and will be collecting tissue again after her lunch I'm sure!
For a while mum did this, I started to buy very cheap tissues as they were not being used for anything except fold and put in pockets, I would find folded tissues all over the place. So when a new box was opened I removed half and hide away the rest, same with loo paper started buying a cheaper type and only had one roll out at a time. To distract her I would give her lots of pillow cases, tea towels to fold.
Not had the tap and water obsession, but plenty of other on/off obsessions.
Not had the tap and water obsession, but plenty of other on/off obsessions.
Oh what memories this brings back... My Mum was never without tissues or she would tear paper into tiny tiny squares!!!!!! Every sleeve and pocket had to be searched before the washing could be started.
Yes only leave out a part roll of paper....literally roll it off one roll onto an empty tube...and don't rush to replace the empty. Fib...tell her that you'll get some when you go to the shops. Only put out half a box of tissues too.
Oh Mum...what memories!!!!
My Mum was never without tissues or she would tear paper into tiny tiny squares!!!!!! Every sleeve and pocket had to be searched before the washing could be started.Yes only leave out a part roll of paper....literally roll it off one roll onto an empty tube...and don't rush to replace the empty. Fib...tell her that you'll get some when you go to the shops. Only put out half a box of tissues too.
Oh Mum...what memories!!!!
Can definitely empathise about the tissues. For the last four years my husband had been obsessed with them, so it's not just a passing phase for us.
He has up to 10 tissues in each trouser pocket at any given time as well as a pile of screwed up but clean ones under the pillow or on the bedside cabinet.
I've given up throwing the ones in the bedroom out (doesn't look nice but they are clean) because he just goes and gets more.
Sometimes, when I am emptying his pockets to put trousers in the wash I feel like one of those magicians pulling a never ending line of handkies from a top hat - it goes on forever!
He has up to 10 tissues in each trouser pocket at any given time as well as a pile of screwed up but clean ones under the pillow or on the bedside cabinet.
I've given up throwing the ones in the bedroom out (doesn't look nice but they are clean) because he just goes and gets more.
Sometimes, when I am emptying his pockets to put trousers in the wash I feel like one of those magicians pulling a never ending line of handkies from a top hat - it goes on forever!
Oh My God...the tissues
Tissues are the bane of my life with my mum. She has mixed dementia that was diagnosed three years ago. I have never seen so many tissues, they are absolutely everywhere in her house. I have tried buying packets of pocket tissues to keep in her bag and boxes of tissues to put within easy reach of each room she is in,none of these seem to prevent her from continually taking the loo roll from the bathroom and tearing off sheets and folding them to store all over the place. She used to do it with the kitchen roll too but I am learning to hide those now to try to minimise the waste. She denies that it is her doing any of it when I try to explain that she has enough of them to last a lifetime.............its driving me crazy !!....You have to laugh sometimes just to get through this terrible disease.
Tissues are the bane of my life with my mum. She has mixed dementia that was diagnosed three years ago. I have never seen so many tissues, they are absolutely everywhere in her house. I have tried buying packets of pocket tissues to keep in her bag and boxes of tissues to put within easy reach of each room she is in,none of these seem to prevent her from continually taking the loo roll from the bathroom and tearing off sheets and folding them to store all over the place. She used to do it with the kitchen roll too but I am learning to hide those now to try to minimise the waste. She denies that it is her doing any of it when I try to explain that she has enough of them to last a lifetime.............its driving me crazy !!....You have to laugh sometimes just to get through this terrible disease.
I agree you do have to laugh or you really would crack up! I think we are going to contact the social worker again though cos we both work and have a 3 year old. And I'm only in my 30s - didn't expect so much responsibility I guess (not that it's a breeze at any age). Already got a gas detector in case she turns/leaves hob on. And have to put keys on a hook or she opens front/back door to look for my father in law even though he's only popped to shop for milk 3mins away. She previously had 3 strokes which then accellerated the dementia but she also has diabetes and various other ailments. Medication is a worry for me. Father in law us deaf and blind in 1 eye yet he still insists on giving the meds. I do wonder if she would be better in a care home as it seems everybody's health is suffering. People who used to visit when she was well no longer bother to visit. We are just left to it. My husband is also on anti-depressants due to the stress. So in the scheme of things I think this tissue obsession has just tipped me over the edge
My mum has that obsession with tissues too, she either folds them or shreds them. We tried at home giving her cloth handkerchiefs, which did work, but now she is in the care home we have had to go back to paper tissues as the cloth ones kept disappearing, so now we have the old problem back xx
Ange
xxAnge
I am so glad I am not the only one to suffer the "tissue confetti" when going through her clothes.
I use to buy the boxes of tissues for Mum but she would empty the box and fold them up and would stash them in the drawers around the room. I decided to purchase the pocket packs to see if that would help...Yep! you guessed it, it didn't make any difference. Although I am able to determine which have been used.
I have found out from the carer that she dries them out on the radiator so I make sure she has plenty in the house. I have noticed that my Mum will sit for hours folding the tissues into different shapes and patterns. One day she sat folding a tissue and before I knew it she said "look at my birdy he wants to kiss you" to my amazement she had folded the tissue into a bird but she has never done origami or anything similar.
I also switched to a particular brand as I was fed up of my Mum's clothes covered in tissue as the carers are not great a checking the pockets. The brand I purchase now doesn't break down so it is easier and I have found them for £1 in my local independent chemist.
She does the same with the kitchen roll and toilet tissue, folds it up so neatly and precise but since I have been purchasing the pocket tissues she hardly uses these and keeps with the tissues. I just have to persuade her not to dry them on the radiators!
I use to buy the boxes of tissues for Mum but she would empty the box and fold them up and would stash them in the drawers around the room. I decided to purchase the pocket packs to see if that would help...Yep! you guessed it, it didn't make any difference. Although I am able to determine which have been used.
I have found out from the carer that she dries them out on the radiator so I make sure she has plenty in the house. I have noticed that my Mum will sit for hours folding the tissues into different shapes and patterns. One day she sat folding a tissue and before I knew it she said "look at my birdy he wants to kiss you" to my amazement she had folded the tissue into a bird but she has never done origami or anything similar.
I also switched to a particular brand as I was fed up of my Mum's clothes covered in tissue as the carers are not great a checking the pockets. The brand I purchase now doesn't break down so it is easier and I have found them for £1 in my local independent chemist.
She does the same with the kitchen roll and toilet tissue, folds it up so neatly and precise but since I have been purchasing the pocket tissues she hardly uses these and keeps with the tissues. I just have to persuade her not to dry them on the radiators!
My mum used to put used toilet tissue paper in piles on top of the cistern and on the radiator and use them again at least once. She could make a toilet roll last for ages and went mad when we threw the away.
Oh yes. I'm thinking about taking shares out with a certain tissue company. Its worse at nightime. They're everywhere when I go into her room in the morning. Under the pillows, under the mattress, bin is always full plus she stuffs them all up her nightie, down her pull ups. Sigh. Could be worse I suppose bless her. Xx
Mum has just recently gone into a care home, and still has her tissue/serviette obsession. Pockets and handbag stuffed full. Folded, refolded or scrunched up.
At home also it was cleaning cloths and sponges, not that she ever used them, and washing copious pairs of undies a day. She hadn't wet them, it was just a thing she liked to do. Most days 12 prs of undies out her drawer washed and hanging up to dry, the next day she would do the same.
In the Care home, she hasn't washed or put up to dry any undies at all.
At home also it was cleaning cloths and sponges, not that she ever used them, and washing copious pairs of undies a day. She hadn't wet them, it was just a thing she liked to do. Most days 12 prs of undies out her drawer washed and hanging up to dry, the next day she would do the same.
In the Care home, she hasn't washed or put up to dry any undies at all.
Apart from needing to have several tissues in pockets and tucked up sleeves, my mum used them to wrap items up in - which could be orange peel, dentures, money, whatever eek - so I always had to check that tissues didn't contain important objects... Goodness knows what ended up in landfill or down the lavatory!
And I've kept a few of her coats and jackets, and still find tissues in the pockets - bittersweet reminders of her
eek - so I always had to check that tissues didn't contain important objects... Goodness knows what ended up in landfill or down the lavatory!And I've kept a few of her coats and jackets, and still find tissues in the pockets - bittersweet reminders of her
Yes, my mum had the tissue obsession, too. They were absolutely all over - dropped on the floor, left around on the furniture, in all her pockets, stuffed up her sleeves. This must be very common, mustn't it?
I think it must be. My sister has recently told me that our grandmother who dead in the 1970's, used to wrap individual tea bags and other bits and pieces in paper hankies.
