My mum lives at my home gets pension and pension credit plus high rate mobility and care component, she organised for her money to be paid into my bank account years ago because she always hated banks, i left it too late to get lpa and we are waiting foe a social services assessment even though mum is in middle/late stage alzheimers I have muddled on and took care of without help and left the finances as they were is there anything wrong with this?
Advice on finances
- Thread starter Bagpuss77j
- Start date
Hi Bagpuss...The problem with Mum using your bank account will come ( and I presume it is still in your name and not joint names but even if it is, the following will still apply) if you have to have a financial assessment of Mum's finances for funding of services. Because your finances also go through the account, your details will be shown on the statements. It might be better for you to open a separate account for your own monies so that you can keep them private.
One problem if you have a joint account with Mum is that if Mum is declared NOT to have capacity,the Bank could freeze the account.
Regards, Maureen.x.x
One problem if you have a joint account with Mum is that if Mum is declared NOT to have capacity,the Bank could freeze the account.
Regards, Maureen.x.x
I think you will need to be honest and open, ad be prepared to get your own bank statements out, and have some accountability for her portion of the money.
You might well have a very difficult time if her assests( In her name) are under the threshold of £23K ( the magic figure)
Really you should have kept it separate, both for her sake and yours
You might well have a very difficult time if her assests( In her name) are under the threshold of £23K ( the magic figure)
Really you should have kept it separate, both for her sake and yours
If it is a joint account, it would be assumed by the LA that your mum owns 50% of the amount in the account, regardless of who contributed what.
If it's in your name, there is a risk that this could be seen by the LA as your mum trying to 'hide' or 'gift' her income to you and that would be deprivation of assets. I know you wouldn't do this, but there would have been nothing to stop you using her money yourself if it was in your name.
I can see why it seemed like a good idea at the time, but really you need to separate your money and mum's asap. Try also, if you don't have it already, to create a record of money paid into the account by mum and bills/expenses paid out from her income up to date of separating the accounts. Then you would know what balance (if any) is properly 'hers' and can go into the new account.
Leaving things as they are would cause all kinds of problems. One obvious one would be how would an executor work out the value of mum's estate if the worst happened and she passed away?
If it's in your name, there is a risk that this could be seen by the LA as your mum trying to 'hide' or 'gift' her income to you and that would be deprivation of assets. I know you wouldn't do this, but there would have been nothing to stop you using her money yourself if it was in your name.
I can see why it seemed like a good idea at the time, but really you need to separate your money and mum's asap. Try also, if you don't have it already, to create a record of money paid into the account by mum and bills/expenses paid out from her income up to date of separating the accounts. Then you would know what balance (if any) is properly 'hers' and can go into the new account.
Leaving things as they are would cause all kinds of problems. One obvious one would be how would an executor work out the value of mum's estate if the worst happened and she passed away?
Thanks
Thanks for your advice but I am really scared now this as all creeped on me over the past six months as she as got so much worse, until then my mum trusted me we had verbal agreement with everything and I have looked after her she gets less than £250 a week off her pension and mobility and I am forever spending money out on her for clothes,bed Linen and Toiletry needs ( coz she is doubly incontinent) not to mention new mattress, day care( which she went to for two months) bed rails,holidays, trips, ect,ect,ect any bits left over I save in the savings account I have towards her funeral because her life insurance policy won't pay for half of it, it is all muddled up the way I have done it with no clear divisions between our monies but I have certainly not made profit out of it I don't even claim carers allowance or attendance allowance, my sacrifices have cost more than a few pound here and there and now I regret asking for a care assessment and dread it happening
Thanks for your advice but I am really scared now this as all creeped on me over the past six months as she as got so much worse, until then my mum trusted me we had verbal agreement with everything and I have looked after her she gets less than £250 a week off her pension and mobility and I am forever spending money out on her for clothes,bed Linen and Toiletry needs ( coz she is doubly incontinent) not to mention new mattress, day care( which she went to for two months) bed rails,holidays, trips, ect,ect,ect any bits left over I save in the savings account I have towards her funeral because her life insurance policy won't pay for half of it, it is all muddled up the way I have done it with no clear divisions between our monies but I have certainly not made profit out of it I don't even claim carers allowance or attendance allowance, my sacrifices have cost more than a few pound here and there and now I regret asking for a care assessment and dread it happening
Thanks
Thanks for your advice but I am really scared now this as all creeped on me over the past six months as she as got so much worse, until then my mum trusted me we had verbal agreement with everything and I have looked after her she gets less than £250 a week off her pension and mobility and I am forever spending money out on her for clothes,bed Linen and Toiletry needs ( coz she is doubly incontinent) not to mention new mattress, day care( which she went to for two months) bed rails,holidays, trips, ect,ect,ect any bits left over I save in the savings account I have towards her funeral because her life insurance policy won't pay for half of it, it is all muddled up the way I have done it with no clear divisions between our monies but I have certainly not made profit out of it I don't even claim carers allowance or attendance allowance, my sacrifices have cost more than a few pound here and there and now I regret asking for a care assessment and dread it happening
Thanks for your advice but I am really scared now this as all creeped on me over the past six months as she as got so much worse, until then my mum trusted me we had verbal agreement with everything and I have looked after her she gets less than £250 a week off her pension and mobility and I am forever spending money out on her for clothes,bed Linen and Toiletry needs ( coz she is doubly incontinent) not to mention new mattress, day care( which she went to for two months) bed rails,holidays, trips, ect,ect,ect any bits left over I save in the savings account I have towards her funeral because her life insurance policy won't pay for half of it, it is all muddled up the way I have done it with no clear divisions between our monies but I have certainly not made profit out of it I don't even claim carers allowance or attendance allowance, my sacrifices have cost more than a few pound here and there and now I regret asking for a care assessment and dread it happening
I don't work because I look after mum 24/7 in my home but my husband as a income and obviously gives me the money for housekeeping and bills so I leave mum's money in and it does pay the bills so to speak but then I pay her contribution to the household, car,expenses and needs out of my mine and my husbands money....do you understand what I mean?
Also I do save up for her as I say fir her funeral costs because of a very poor insurance policy she took out that I still have to pay for her
Hi Bagpuss77j
maybe for now let the past be for a while and concentrate on what you can do to help sort things out
I think someone suggested you open a new account for yourself - this would seem to be something you can do without anyone objecting - so as soon as you can go to your bank and ask them to set up a new current account solely in your name and have all your own income paid into it - also have all your own outgoings paid out only from that account, so If you have direct debits in force have those moved over - this new account will then be solely for your own personal finances
this should leave the account you are presently using with only your mum's money going in even though the account is in your name and is not a joint account (I believe this is what you mean when you say your mum has her income paid into your account)
doing all this will show anyone looking into your mum's finances that you have been acting in good faith so far but now understand there is potentially a problem and have taken sensible steps to begin to sort the situation out
there is no need to explain to the bank why you are doing all this
then just check the existing account so that all of your mum's own bills, fees etc are being and will be paid from that account - and from now on use that account to pay for anything which is specifically for your mum eg her toiletries, her clothes, having her hair done ...
then sit down with the utility bills for your home (gas, electric, water, phone, Council Tax if that is still being paid in full ...) and decide what you feel is a fair amount to have your mum contribute; look at how much you spend on food for you both, cleaning products for the house and anything else that you share the use of, and work out a fair share for your mum to pay - when you have looked at all shared expenses, then organise a direct debit payment each month from the existing account (which is now effectively your mum's) into your own new account - and that will be living expenses taken care of
at this point you will have pretty much sorted out the finances for the future
I'm wondering why you have not applied for Attendance Allowance or Carer's Allowance - look into these and if your mum are eligible for the AA, get that application filled in asap, Age UK or CAB can help you - and the extra money will be very helpful - then look into CA if you are eligible
and have you contacted your Council about a decrease in Council Tax with regard to your mum - that should be 25% off
when you've sorted out all the present finances, then start looking at what happened in the past - get/print out statements and as far as you can remember make a note next to each payment explaining what it was for and whether it was for you, for your mum (all those things you've mentioned in your posts eg new mattress, new sheets ...) or shared expenses (I'd be using 3 coloured highlighters - and not highlighting any payments I wasn't sure about to look into later) - same with income; make it clear what is your mum's and what is yours (2 more colours?)
if you have any receipts/paperwork/invoices etc, get them together in a folder
this way you are gradually working your way through everything and beginning to sort out what's your mum's and what's yours
just be honest with the LA, that way they are less likely to think there's something untoward going on - you won't be the only people they've dealt with who haven't quite got their finances perfectly organised
when you have the assessment, do ask what help is available with incontinence and mobility
sorry to have gone on - this is just what I'd do in your situation to settle my own mind
best wishes
PS this took so long to type Jessbow has asked questions - not sure now whether you have any income of your own - but I still think you need to make the account your mum's money is paid into SOLELY for HER - any purchases for her should then come from that account - she should be paying her own way (but, of course, not paying any of your personal expenses); you yourself and/or your husband shouldn't have to pay any of her bills/fees etc
maybe for now let the past be for a while and concentrate on what you can do to help sort things out
I think someone suggested you open a new account for yourself - this would seem to be something you can do without anyone objecting - so as soon as you can go to your bank and ask them to set up a new current account solely in your name and have all your own income paid into it - also have all your own outgoings paid out only from that account, so If you have direct debits in force have those moved over - this new account will then be solely for your own personal finances
this should leave the account you are presently using with only your mum's money going in even though the account is in your name and is not a joint account (I believe this is what you mean when you say your mum has her income paid into your account)
doing all this will show anyone looking into your mum's finances that you have been acting in good faith so far but now understand there is potentially a problem and have taken sensible steps to begin to sort the situation out
there is no need to explain to the bank why you are doing all this
then just check the existing account so that all of your mum's own bills, fees etc are being and will be paid from that account - and from now on use that account to pay for anything which is specifically for your mum eg her toiletries, her clothes, having her hair done ...
then sit down with the utility bills for your home (gas, electric, water, phone, Council Tax if that is still being paid in full ...) and decide what you feel is a fair amount to have your mum contribute; look at how much you spend on food for you both, cleaning products for the house and anything else that you share the use of, and work out a fair share for your mum to pay - when you have looked at all shared expenses, then organise a direct debit payment each month from the existing account (which is now effectively your mum's) into your own new account - and that will be living expenses taken care of
at this point you will have pretty much sorted out the finances for the future
I'm wondering why you have not applied for Attendance Allowance or Carer's Allowance - look into these and if your mum are eligible for the AA, get that application filled in asap, Age UK or CAB can help you - and the extra money will be very helpful - then look into CA if you are eligible
and have you contacted your Council about a decrease in Council Tax with regard to your mum - that should be 25% off
when you've sorted out all the present finances, then start looking at what happened in the past - get/print out statements and as far as you can remember make a note next to each payment explaining what it was for and whether it was for you, for your mum (all those things you've mentioned in your posts eg new mattress, new sheets ...) or shared expenses (I'd be using 3 coloured highlighters - and not highlighting any payments I wasn't sure about to look into later) - same with income; make it clear what is your mum's and what is yours (2 more colours?)
if you have any receipts/paperwork/invoices etc, get them together in a folder
this way you are gradually working your way through everything and beginning to sort out what's your mum's and what's yours
just be honest with the LA, that way they are less likely to think there's something untoward going on - you won't be the only people they've dealt with who haven't quite got their finances perfectly organised
when you have the assessment, do ask what help is available with incontinence and mobility
sorry to have gone on - this is just what I'd do in your situation to settle my own mind
best wishes
PS this took so long to type Jessbow has asked questions - not sure now whether you have any income of your own - but I still think you need to make the account your mum's money is paid into SOLELY for HER - any purchases for her should then come from that account - she should be paying her own way (but, of course, not paying any of your personal expenses); you yourself and/or your husband shouldn't have to pay any of her bills/fees etc
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And you know wot really peeves me off if she was in a emi care home that they say she would probably need it would cost at least £700 more each week than the money she gets in total each week so by me and my family looking after her and may I say surprisingly well we are saving the state we are saving the state £2,800 a month!!!!
so please do organise Attendance Allowance .... and then Carer's Allowance - no point in not applying for them when they are not means tested
and if your mum is below the financial threshold, at least part of her care fees will be paid by the LA
I'm sorry that you are feeling scared. Take a deep breath or two. Shedrech has given you some excellent suggestions. It can all be sorted out, and being honest is always going to be your best bet. Don't regret asking for a care assessment; use it as the opportunity to get the best help you can for your mum and for you as a carer. Looking after both of you is the important thing.
Thanks fellow carers
I will open a separate account for all
My monies and bills asap and will be applying for all financial help I can get I have sat here worrying when my days are hard enough I refuse to feel bad over this when I may have been naive but I have certainly only ever done the best for my mum and sacrificed and put my life on hold to do it I refuse to let the state ruin the time I have wth my mum or make my caring role any harder! If my mum had not been getting any money I would have went to hell and back to try look after her
I will open a separate account for all
My monies and bills asap and will be applying for all financial help I can get I have sat here worrying when my days are hard enough I refuse to feel bad over this when I may have been naive but I have certainly only ever done the best for my mum and sacrificed and put my life on hold to do it I refuse to let the state ruin the time I have wth my mum or make my caring role any harder! If my mum had not been getting any money I would have went to hell and back to try look after her
