Mum just wished she was dead

Rachael81

Registered User
Dec 31, 2015
59
0
Dewsbury, West Yorkshire
So I've just been "super-daughter to the rescue" yet again, driving 15-20 minutes to mums as she's pressed something on the TV remote and can't get any channels... Whilst there she was upset at having had to make me come out (but she can't function without her TV) and wished she was dead so as to not be a nuisance... Feel shell shocked that she's just said it.


Rachael

"I'm thankful for my struggle because without it I wouldn't have stumbled across my strength" - Alex Elle
 

cragmaid

Registered User
Oct 18, 2010
7,936
0
North East England
Mine used to say that....and she would say " I'm Stupid" too....now that one used to make me furious, because what ever else she was she was never stupid, confused....yes....infuriating.....yes......downright nasty sometimes...yes....just not stupid!

It does make you sad to hear these things and all I can suggest is to try to jolly her out of it.....try saying something like " well I'm glad your not....I'm not old enough to do without you yet";) If she says she's a nuisance...try " yeah, but you're my nuisance":rolleyes:.....and then the real comeback to " I wish I was dead"..... " That can be easily arranged":rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:
Don't let these things hurt you too much.... regards, Maureen.x
 

Rageddy Anne

Registered User
Feb 21, 2013
5,984
0
Cotswolds
I usually say " well, let's have that cup of tea first" and in a few seconds he's forgotten. If he comes back I'll try " sorry, that's terribly inconvenient at the moment..." with a bit of a laugh, as though he'd made a joke. Sometimes it works....
 

Cat27

Registered User
Feb 27, 2015
13,057
0
Merseyside
My dad says it a lot now. I just reply oh ok & change the subject.
Any other reply makes him kick off.
 

Kjn

Registered User
Jul 27, 2013
5,833
0
My dad said if a lot too, that and I'm the village idiot, I'm stupid etc.
It's hard xx
 

Georgina63

Registered User
Aug 11, 2014
973
0
Likewise

My mum says that a lot. Wish I was dead, I'm so stupid etc. It is heartbreaking, but I just try and move the conversation on. i suppose if in our head we replace the phrase with 'I'm fed up' maybe that might make it a little better?! Gx
 

JayneB6367

Registered User
Dec 18, 2013
38
0
So I've just been "super-daughter to the rescue" yet again, driving 15-20 minutes to mums as she's pressed something on the TV remote and can't get any channels... Whilst there she was upset at having had to make me come out (but she can't function without her TV) and wished she was dead so as to not be a nuisance... Feel shell shocked that she's just said it.


Rachael

"I'm thankful for my struggle because without it I wouldn't have stumbled across my strength" - Alex Elle

Mum was the same, always saying she was stupid, wanting to die and in fact asking us to kill her. Sadly its a phase and it does stop to be replaced by another one. I either ignored the comment or told her I loved her and that she wasn't stupid/i didn't want her to die.

Funnily enough this all stopped when we took the difficult decision to put mum in a home, once she had settled she was so much happier and apart from an obsession with shutting windows and curtains is mostly cheerful and content now. I hardly ever hear her say anything negative now so every cloud certainly has a silver lining.

Re the tv remote we coloured the buttons she needed with nail polish as it was easier to tell her to press red and blue than up and down etc which meant nothing to her. We use to get 5 or 6 calls a day re this, being 2 hours away we were very lucky her neighbour would often pop in and help with this.

Good luck.