In need of a virtual hug

[hvml]

Hi Rob. I have done a week of training and am ready to start the hands on business as soon as my DBS comes. The training was really interesting and made me think how invaluable it would be to have a voluntary organization that offered training for unpaid Carers at the start of their journey. In our situation, every little bit of knowledge is so hard won, that it made me think what a difference it would have made to have some instruction and clarification of some kind. I wouldn't have the first clue of how to set something up, but if anyone does, I'd love to help.Maybe an idea for the future?

I hope you and OH are in your element now that summer is here!

Hi Shedrech. Thanks so much for your kind words. I will make a point of coming on to TP and build it in to my routine. It's such a mine of information, experience and love and changed my life once I found it - and you all.

Thanks again

Gill - I am thinking of you.

Lots of love, Heidi xx xx

 

[Louby65]

Hi Heidi . It is so good to ' see ' you on our wee thread . I was hoping you would come back on and let us know how you are doing . It is such sad news about Gills dad . She will be missing him terribly . I think about my own dad every day and he died 23 years ago , so I know how sad both of you are . Keep in touch and let us know how you are doing and when you start your new job , I'm excited for you . I know you will do well , you have the right attitude. Best of luck , Lou xx

 

[exhausted 2015]

Hi Rob. I have done a week of training and am ready to start the hands on business as soon as my DBS comes. The training was really interesting and made me think how invaluable it would be to have a voluntary organization that offered training for unpaid Carers at the start of their journey. In our situation, every little bit of knowledge is so hard won, that it made me think what a difference it would have made to have some instruction and clarification of some kind. I wouldn't have the first clue of how to set something up, but if anyone does, I'd love to help.Maybe an idea for the future?

I hope you and OH are in your element now that summer is here!

Hi Shedrech. Thanks so much for your kind words. I will make a point of coming on to TP and build it in to my routine. It's such a mine of information, experience and love and changed my life once I found it - and yo

Gill - I am thinking of you.

Lots of love, Heidi xx xx

Heidi, I'm so pleased that you have popped on as I wanted to tell you about dad, I was thinking of sending you a PM to let you know, well that is the both of us lost our dads with just a few months apart, thank you for your lovely post, I do hope that we can keep in touch as I have said in a previous post I don't want to lose any of my dear tp friends you all have been my strength and will always be grateful xxx
I wish you well my friend with your new career, I am sure that you will shine xxx
Hello Jackie and rob , hope that all is well with you and thank you for asking how things are going xx...at the moment I'm still waiting on the coroner but I'm hopeful that I will hear from him early next week, we've now made the funeral arrangements for Thursday 23rd June with the hope that there is no delay from the coroner, we have chosen some fitting hymns for the service... "I vow to thee my country"and " onwards Christian soldiers " due to dad being a ww2 veteran. I wanted a vera Lynn song playing (" we'll meet again" ) but have now decided that it would be too upsetting, I am really dreading the funeral because I know that I am going to go to pieces xxx
Tomorrow I have an appointment at the job centre ..so wish me luck please, ii just hope that I don't get someone a fraction of my age asking what I've been doing for the past 8 years
Goodnight my friends, sleep well xxxx

 

[Louby65]

Hi Gill , how are you ? Have you heard anything back from the coroner . I hope so , it's such a heartbreaking long time waiting . I have been thinking of you and hope that you are looking after yourself . Take care , Lou xx

 

[Louby65]

Hi Jackie . I'm sorry to hear your dad hasn't been so good . My own mum has been a bit up and down lately . The weather has been very hot lately and think it's affected her . I hope your dad picks up a bit soon . Take care , Lou xx

 

[Louby65]

Hi rob , how are you and your OH getting on ? I hope this post finds both of you in good health and enjoying the nice weather . I bought my mum a new lightweight wheelchair , to take her out, as the other one was so heavy and cumbersome . Her carer and myself found it difficult at times getting it in and out of the car . Gave her old one to her day centre , they were pleased as it was quite new , so will do a turn . Take care , Lou .

 

[exhausted 2015]

Hi Gill , how are you ? Have you heard anything back from the coroner . I hope so , it's such a heartbreaking long time waiting . I have been thinking of you and hope that you are looking after yourself . Take care , Lou xx

Hello Lou, ii was just thinking of you, when you get chance I have a twiddle muff ready for your mum xx
as I said above I've made the arrangements for dads funeral but have heard that it will be Monday or Tuesday before I hear from the coroner, apparently there is a shortage of pathologists and as of Monday just gone dad was 18th on the list, it sounded so awful to be told that but at least I can estimate that I will hear by early next week, I just want him laid to rest. now with mum not waiting round in the hospital mortuary
Take care Lou xxx

 

[Louby65]

Hi Jenny , how are you and your mum. How is she getting on with her carer ? I hope things are working out . I don't know what I would do without my mums carer . She has been fabulous to both my mum and I . She's on holiday this week , having a much deserved break . I have taken a week off to care for my mum . While she has been at her day centre I have pressure washed all the decking in the back garden and have nearly finished painting it . It looks good . So when I get my new furniture my mum and I will be able to enjoy sitting out . Take care , Lou xx

 

[Louby65]

Hi Gill , I must have been writing some posts as you were writing yours . I am sure you will give your lovely dad a very well deserved send off . I remember my own dads' like it was yesterday . Will be thinking of you and wishing you strength on the 23rd . My very best wishes , Lou xx

 

[exhausted 2015]

Hi Jenny , how are you and your mum. How is she getting on with her carer ? I hope things are working out . I don't know what I would do without my mums carer . She has been fabulous to both my mum and I . She's on holiday this week , having a much deserved break . I have taken a week off to care for my mum . While she has been at her day centre I have pressure washed all the decking in the back garden and have nearly finished painting it . It looks good . So when I get my new furniture my mum and I will be able to enjoy sitting out . Take care , Lou xx

I hope that you will have many happy times together sitting out in the back garden xxx

 

[Louby65]

Thanks Gill . Xx

 

[exhausted 2015]

Thanks Gill . Xx

I sincerely mean it Lou ...goodnight xxx

 

[hvml]

Hi Gill.

Thankyou for thinking of me. I hope you are ok. For me, it was like being in a dream in the first days. I'll always have a mental picture of the hospital silhouetted against the dawning day as I sat outside and took a moment for myself. Certain songs that I played on my headphones will always have a special significance. I too am glad that Mum and Dad are reunited and something that gave me comfort was that he passed away on her birthday. Mum would have been 81 on the very day that Dad went to be with her.

The funeral will give you a chance to send him to be with your Mum and although it will be one of the hardest days, it may give you a sense of release on his part and on yours. That is how I felt. One thing we did that added to the feeling of Mum and Dad being reunited was that we put a photo of them on their wedding day on the order of service. It was my brother's idea and I thought it was a good one. He also had a Union jack over his coffin to represent his service in WW2, which was something he would have been over the moon - or rather, "tickled pink" as he used to say!! - about. I'm sure you will feel immense pride as your Dad is recognized for the brave young man that he was and remained to the end.

It sounds a bit humdrum in the scheme of things, but I'd like to ask how you went at the job centre? It's a hard thing to do at the best of times, but in our position............Hmmmmmm.
I hope it was ok. I found 'Indeed' a very useful job site.

I am thinking of you. Xx xx

Hi Lou. Thanks for your kind words. I am still waiting to start and will be pleased once the wait is over. In the meantime, I am in no danger of getting bored and finding plenty to occupy my time.
I hope you and your mum are well and keeping cool.

Lots of love to you both and to everyone. Have a great weekend .

Lots of love, Heidi xx

 

[Chuggalug]

I'm joining in with the hugs for you, exhausted. Phew. Do I remember that word, true in mind and body.

 

[nae sporran]

Hi rob , how are you and your OH getting on ? I hope this post finds both of you in good health and enjoying the nice weather . I bought my mum a new lightweight wheelchair , to take her out, as the other one was so heavy and cumbersome . Her carer and myself found it difficult at times getting it in and out of the car . Gave her old one to her day centre , they were pleased as it was quite new , so will do a turn . Take care , Lou .

We are getting by, thanks Lou. Probably did too much in the heat of last week and needing a few days to recover. One of these days I'll learn. That new wheelchair sounds good, hope you get plenty of outings together.

 

[nae sporran]

Hello Lou, ii was just thinking of you, when you get chance I have a twiddle muff ready for your mum xx
as I said above I've made the arrangements for dads funeral but have heard that it will be Monday or Tuesday before I hear from the coroner, apparently there is a shortage of pathologists and as of Monday just gone dad was 18th on the list, it sounded so awful to be told that but at least I can estimate that I will hear by early next week, I just want him laid to rest. now with mum not waiting round in the hospital mortuary
Take care Lou xxx

Gill, hope that means an early result for you and even if you won't be looking forward to it, one less thing to deal with. Will be thinking of you on the 23rd. Look after yourself.

 

[jknight]

Hi Jenny , how are you and your mum. How is she getting on with her carer ? I hope things are working out . I don't know what I would do without my mums carer . She has been fabulous to both my mum and I . She's on holiday this week , having a much deserved break . I have taken a week off to care for my mum . While she has been at her day centre I have pressure washed all the decking in the back garden and have nearly finished painting it . It looks good . So when I get my new furniture my mum and I will be able to enjoy sitting out . Take care , Lou xx

Hi Lou!,
I wrote a long post in reply to you! It disappeared into the ether!! Here is a précis!!
Mum likes the befriending carers but not meals on wheels. She leaves notes every day to say 'no more hot meals'. Every day I steal the note and she forgets that she has written it. Am I doing the right thing? She was living on small (400g) sandwiches and no fruit or veg and her diet is so much better now. xxx

 

[exhausted 2015]

Hi Gill.

Thankyou for thinking of me. I hope you are ok. For me, it was like being in a dream in the first days. I'll always have a mental picture of the hospital silhouetted against the dawning day as I sat outside and took a moment for myself. Certain songs that I played on my headphones will always have a special significance. I too am glad that Mum and Dad are reunited and something that gave me comfort was that he passed away on her birthday. Mum would have been 81 on the very day that Dad went to be with her.

The funeral will give you a chance to send him to be with your Mum and although it will be one of the hardest days, it may give you a sense of release on his part and on yours. That is how I felt. One thing we did that added to the feeling of Mum and Dad being reunited was that we put a photo of them on their wedding day on the order of service. It was my brother's idea and I thought it was a good one. He also had a Union jack over his coffin to represent his service in WW2, which was something he would have been over the moon - or rather, "tickled pink" as he used to say!! - about. I'm sure you will feel immense pride as your Dad is recognized for the brave young man that he was and remained to the end.

It sounds a bit humdrum in the scheme of things, but I'd like to ask how you went at the job centre? It's a hard thing to do at the best of times, but in our position............Hmmmmmm.
I hope it was ok. I found 'Indeed' a very useful job site.

I am thinking of you. Xx xx

Hi Lou. Thanks for your kind words. I am still waiting to start and will be pleased once the wait is over. In the meantime, I am in no danger of getting bored and finding plenty to occupy my time.
I hope you and your mum are well and keeping cool.

Lots of love to you both and to everyone. Have a great weekend .

Lots of love, Heidi xx

Hello Heidi, I think that the job centre was a big mistake, I've probably done it a bit too soon due to all the hoops that I will have to jump through, I am expected to attend the job centre everyday for the first month for" moving into work sessions" also I am expected to go to a job club at the library twice a week ongoing ,one of these sessions overlap with the daily sessions at the job centre....so I am supposed to be in two places at one time ...silly I know I can't make a session on Monday as the vicar is comming also there is the funeral ect....so I am probably going to cancel my claim for now xxxx

 

[nae sporran]

Hi Lou!,
I wrote a long post in reply to you! It disappeared into the ether!! Here is a précis!!
Mum likes the befriending carers but not meals on wheels. She leaves notes every day to say 'no more hot meals'. Every day I steal the note and she forgets that she has written it. Am I doing the right thing? She was living on small (400g) sandwiches and no fruit or veg and her diet is so much better now. xxx

Sorry to butt in Jenny. OH often says she does not want the carers when the bell rings, but gets on well with them. She also says she does not want the hot meal I offer, prefers bludi sandwiches , but then enjoys her meal. So, from my limited experience you are doing the right thing.

 

[nae sporran]

Hello Heidi, I think that the job centre was a big mistake, I've probably done it a bit too soon due to all the hoops that I will have to jump through, I am expected to attend the job centre everyday for the first month for" moving into work sessions" also I am expected to go to a job club at the library twice a week ongoing ,one of these sessions overlap with the daily sessions at the job centre....so I am supposed to be in two places at one time ...silly I know I can't make a session on Monday as the vicar is comming also there is the funeral ect....so I am probably going to cancel my claim for now xxxx

Sorry Gill. That's probably the best plan for now if you can survive financially, the new DWP rules are not very compassionate or accommodating. Best wishes as ever, Rob