Scared

[danonwheels]

I'm scared. I'm sure that's nothing new to any of you. I just needed to tell someone.

My 2 biggest fears have always been if I were to go blind and death, but now I'm scared over what the future will bring, however long it lasts.

I've been a wheelchair user for the past 10 years and recently got my first powerchair. I got used to that.

I've survived cancer twice. First time left me unable to have kids. I got used to that (although I still get upset about it at times). Second time gave me a renewed determination to live life.

I had to give up driving at the beginning of March and am still getting used to that. On the flip side it has shown me what good, supportive friends, family and work colleagues I have.

But this. This thing that's going on inside my head - there's nothing I can beat or overcome. I can't win or survive. And I'm scared.

 

[canary]

Hello danonwheels and welcome to Talking Point
I wont say "dont be scared" because we all get scared at times, but this forum is very helpful and caring and Im glad that you have good family and friends.

If you have a problem someone is bound to have a tip to pass on. There are people who can understand your feelings. You can also have a jolly good rant on here if that helps.
Do keep posting and use this forum to help you on your journey.

 

[aprilbday]

Wow! You have overcome a great deal. You will be ok. Everything will be alright. I have a best friend who is blind. His wife is blind too. They are amazing people. She has been written up in the newspaper for her work with the community at the Blind Center and he was a computer programmer for the Internal Revenue Service (taxes here). He took the train by himself, used headphones to hear the keys he would use. When we went swimming one day at a local pool, he asked me about the diving board. I answered all his questions and before you knew it, he walked over with his stick and climbed the board. Every eye in the place was on this blind man diving off the board. It was awesome! With that said, you have the right to be afraid, but don't let it consume you. Don't let it control you. You will be ok. You will.
And if you are a believer of such, I share this one thought for you to ponder:


"For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind."

2 Timothy 1:7King James Version (KJV)

 

[Otiruz]

Hello danonwheels

You have shown great courage in your life already. Battling-on must have always been your mantra - so many people would crumble at half of what you have already experienced. Whatever inner strength has seen you through your life so far will continue to be there through the next stage.

It is very difficult to put into words how much empathy and friendship there is on TP - perhaps some people will read your post and not know exactly what to say but they are still there. Likewise, what can I say that will help? But I do know that this small part of the world is full of loving, caring, genuinely kind people who will be willing you to live the best life you can, call on support as and when you need it and know that owning up to being scared is in fact, being very very brave.

 

[fizzie]

Otiruz has said it all in such a wonderful way that I don't have anything to add except that I will hold your hand in the virtual world as will many others. Keep posting, thinking of you x

 

[Aisling]

I'm scared. I'm sure that's nothing new to any of you. I just needed to tell someone.

My 2 biggest fears have always been if I were to go blind and death, but now I'm scared over what the future will bring, however long it lasts.

I've been a wheelchair user for the past 10 years and recently got my first powerchair. I got used to that.

I've survived cancer twice. First time left me unable to have kids. I got used to that (although I still get upset about it at times). Second time gave me a renewed determination to live life.

I had to give up driving at the beginning of March and am still getting used to that. On the flip side it has shown me what good, supportive friends, family and work colleagues I have.

But this. This thing that's going on inside my head - there's nothing I can beat or overcome. I can't win or survive. And I'm scared.

You are amazing. Try not to think too much about the future. You will be fine as you obviously have great courage.

Sending you blessings and lots of support,

Aisling

 

[danonwheels]

Thank you all x

 

[JackieJames]

Thank you all x

Danonwheels: The others have said it so well. I will just leave you with a great big hug
(((((((((((((((( hug )))))))))))))))))))).
You have been strong before and you will be strong now.
To be afraid, is normal.
One day at a time, one hour at a time, and sometimes, just one moment at a time.