Feel awful, mums been in CH now for 10 weeks. Mixed dementia and advanced COPD. I've just had the CH call me, they put mum on phone who said " I'm going home, I e been told I don't need to be here, if you don't get me, I'm going by myself" to be honest, I would have rather the nurse give me the heads up first. Apparently one of her friends have left today, to another CH and the nurse said it has shook her up! Feel awful x
Mums called me asking to go home
- Thread starter MimoMilo
- Start date
Hi MimoMilo
I feel for you.
After 10 weeks you hope that things will have settled - however the only constant is that nothing is predictable
I hope that having had her say, your mum will have a calmer evening - the staff will be with her and watching out
and I hope you are not too shaken, and not remotely considering ..... no need to write it as I'm sure you're not
maybe set up some warning system with the staff so that you can have a response prepared and just parrot it out - even better (?) can you ask that your mum doesn't make such calls eg their phone may be out of order or they know you are out at the cinema (and may leave a message for you, if she keeps insisting)
I found with dad that over time the staff learned ways to cope with him and support him, so they take the brunt of these situations, for which I am grateful
glad you posted to get it off your chest - now breath, relax and have a cuppa or your favourite tipple
I feel for you.
After 10 weeks you hope that things will have settled - however the only constant is that nothing is predictable
I hope that having had her say, your mum will have a calmer evening - the staff will be with her and watching out
and I hope you are not too shaken, and not remotely considering ..... no need to write it as I'm sure you're not
maybe set up some warning system with the staff so that you can have a response prepared and just parrot it out - even better (?) can you ask that your mum doesn't make such calls eg their phone may be out of order or they know you are out at the cinema (and may leave a message for you, if she keeps insisting)
I found with dad that over time the staff learned ways to cope with him and support him, so they take the brunt of these situations, for which I am grateful
glad you posted to get it off your chest - now breath, relax and have a cuppa or your favourite tipple
I so agree MimoMilo
I know how I felt when dad wandered off, and don't wish that on anyone
I know he's safe with people around him who take time to look out for him, whatever happens
so I'm glad your mum has calmed and that your call to the staff there has put your mind at rest
best wishes
I know how I felt when dad wandered off, and don't wish that on anyone
I know he's safe with people around him who take time to look out for him, whatever happens
so I'm glad your mum has calmed and that your call to the staff there has put your mind at rest
best wishes
Thank you. Mums only 77, she does look slightly younger than some of the other residents, maybe she notices this ? Gosh, caring for a parent is just the same feelings as caring for a youngster, am I doing the best etc ! This forum truly does help x thank you x
You are doing your best. I hope that soon you will believe that you are doing your best. Deep down I think we know we are doing our best.
Hugs
Aisling
My mum
Hi there my mum also has vascular dementia and severe copd along with anxiety problems she has only been in care home 3 weeks a step down bed which was set up through the hospital she keeps getting excacperation of copd can anyone give me their views on these 3 problems together I just don't know what's next she looks like she is suffocating x
Hi there my mum also has vascular dementia and severe copd along with anxiety problems she has only been in care home 3 weeks a step down bed which was set up through the hospital she keeps getting excacperation of copd can anyone give me their views on these 3 problems together I just don't know what's next she looks like she is suffocating x
