Brief recap: Mother lives at home on own, age 88, with Congestive Heart Failure/Advanced. Very fail and weak and hospitalized frequently. I started to notice changes in memory & behavior and I have long suspected either Cognitive Impairment (one diagnosis years ago) or dementia.
She was again hospitalized for failure to take her medication properly. This is fourth hospitalization in less than one year for non-compliance. She was always very compliant. I do know that she “forgets” to take her pills or as she recently told me “she drops them on the floor sometimes”. She will not allow carers into her house. Throws them out or does not answer the door. Bottom line is she is not legally impaired and, therefore, we cannot force her to do anything.
This last hospitalization, she had a delusion. She believes that she was drugged against her will, put into a room, for what reason she does not know and could not remember the rest of the story. She is filled with fear and anxiety constantly. I called my brother, who has been in denial about possible dementia, and said “You do see that this is clearly delusional, do you not? And he said “yes and what do you want me to do about it?" (he has POA). And he is right. What can we do about it? He told me that she has been seen by four psychiatrists. They don’t see it. How hard is it to see. We do not know what to do. If we got a diagnosis what would we do with that? She is on public aide and in the USA there is no assisted living for that. She is too ill to attend day care. In any case, we can force absolutely nothing on her. And I wonder if we even should. What are we saving her from? I am lost. Even with a diagnosis, I don’t know that there is much we can do. We do not want to put her into a Nursing Home. I cannot reason with her to take her meds/she forgets. I cannot reason with her that she needs carers/she doesn’t see it that way. She eats and drinks very little. Just one question: is there anything I can say to calm her down. She is agitated all the time and quick to anger. I am walking on eggshells
Thank you for reading this.
She was again hospitalized for failure to take her medication properly. This is fourth hospitalization in less than one year for non-compliance. She was always very compliant. I do know that she “forgets” to take her pills or as she recently told me “she drops them on the floor sometimes”. She will not allow carers into her house. Throws them out or does not answer the door. Bottom line is she is not legally impaired and, therefore, we cannot force her to do anything.
This last hospitalization, she had a delusion. She believes that she was drugged against her will, put into a room, for what reason she does not know and could not remember the rest of the story. She is filled with fear and anxiety constantly. I called my brother, who has been in denial about possible dementia, and said “You do see that this is clearly delusional, do you not? And he said “yes and what do you want me to do about it?" (he has POA). And he is right. What can we do about it? He told me that she has been seen by four psychiatrists. They don’t see it. How hard is it to see. We do not know what to do. If we got a diagnosis what would we do with that? She is on public aide and in the USA there is no assisted living for that. She is too ill to attend day care. In any case, we can force absolutely nothing on her. And I wonder if we even should. What are we saving her from? I am lost. Even with a diagnosis, I don’t know that there is much we can do. We do not want to put her into a Nursing Home. I cannot reason with her to take her meds/she forgets. I cannot reason with her that she needs carers/she doesn’t see it that way. She eats and drinks very little. Just one question: is there anything I can say to calm her down. She is agitated all the time and quick to anger. I am walking on eggshells
Thank you for reading this.
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