Hi all,
Back ground is mum has mixed dementia. Diagnosed this year but issues started 5 years ago or more. She was coping fine until dad died and after that a light went out. She has deteriorated a lot recently and has started to wander and is much more confused and depressed. She still lives on her own and my sister and I visit twice a week, 100 mile round trips. Plus we have a lovely Carer that goes in to check on her.
She has always talked about wanting to die, up until recently though it was just a comment, nothing that particularly worried us as she often said it with a smile on her face and it was more wanting to not wake up the next day rather than her being suicidal.
Two weeks ago this changed and now she asks my sister and I to kill her at least 8 times a day, on the phone, walking along the street. It's her new obsession. She gets very agitated when we say we can't as she just cannot understand why not. We have got to a point when we just say to her we will see rather than tell her no much to the shock of anyone who overhears the conversation. My father and grandfather both went into hospital and hospices and never left and she can't understand why we won't take her to one of these places so she can die there. She forgets they were both terminally ill.
Any one else been through this and any ideas on how to handle it?
We are also struggling to accept the fact it may be time to move her into a home but this new desire for someone to kill her worries me that some homes may not even take her!
It's all so tough isn't it, for them and selfishly for us, we are utterly exhausted with it all.
Back ground is mum has mixed dementia. Diagnosed this year but issues started 5 years ago or more. She was coping fine until dad died and after that a light went out. She has deteriorated a lot recently and has started to wander and is much more confused and depressed. She still lives on her own and my sister and I visit twice a week, 100 mile round trips. Plus we have a lovely Carer that goes in to check on her.
She has always talked about wanting to die, up until recently though it was just a comment, nothing that particularly worried us as she often said it with a smile on her face and it was more wanting to not wake up the next day rather than her being suicidal.
Two weeks ago this changed and now she asks my sister and I to kill her at least 8 times a day, on the phone, walking along the street. It's her new obsession. She gets very agitated when we say we can't as she just cannot understand why not. We have got to a point when we just say to her we will see rather than tell her no much to the shock of anyone who overhears the conversation. My father and grandfather both went into hospital and hospices and never left and she can't understand why we won't take her to one of these places so she can die there. She forgets they were both terminally ill.
Any one else been through this and any ideas on how to handle it?
We are also struggling to accept the fact it may be time to move her into a home but this new desire for someone to kill her worries me that some homes may not even take her!
It's all so tough isn't it, for them and selfishly for us, we are utterly exhausted with it all.
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