My apologies for the length of this but I wanted to give a full picture.
My mum was diagnosed with Alzheimer's and vascular dementia about a year ago. She lives alone and is in her 80s. She has diabetes and had a heart attack two years ago.
I usually do mum's weekly shop and cover all her appointments plus I do her weekly medication box (she is on tablets for her heart as well as issues relating to her diabetes). I have been doing this since her heart attack and the dementia has added more in the way of appointments and, of course, phonecalls checking and double checking little things with me. Other than that she manages very well at the moment thankfully.
We want to get a holiday booked for the Easter school holidays to take our son, who is seven, away for a couple of weeks. We need a break - mum had a health issue before Christmas that meant seven appointments in five days and I now feel shattered. We plan to visit Disney world, Florida as our son is the perfect age now. The thought of it is keeping me going at the moment if I am honest as my husband works away from home two to three times a week so I have to split myself between mum and son very carefully at that time!
Mum is very capable of looking after herself. Luckily she still manages to cook and clean (with a weekly clean of the bits she misses by me!). She lives in sheltered housing where she uses the communal lounge every day to have a cuppa and a chat with her neighbours for an hour or so (since she got her diagnosis she took on board what the memory clinic said about meeting people to keep the wheels going). She goes to the local day centre one day a week and has a daily visit from a district nurse as she is insulin dependent for her diabetes.
When we go on holiday I can arrange for a grocery delivery each week, the day centre have said she can have an extra day a week if she wants it and I can do her medication boxes up front. I have a couple of cousins who are happy to phone every couple of days for a chat - they live over a hundred miles away so visiting isn't on but they call her regularly anyway so increasing that isn't a problem for the 16 days we are away.
But, I am really worried about what happens if she has a fall or needs emergency help. She has a lifeline pendant but what happens if she goes to A&E and has no one to sit with her? The last two times she was taken to hospital (a year in between thankfully) it was eleven hours in the A&E department before they found a bed and one of those occasions was when she had a heart attack. Last time she was rushed in she needed the loo and it took me two attempts to find someone who knew where a wheelchair was so I could get her to the toilet. As she's deaf and partially sighted I dread to think how she would manage with no one at her side.
Does anyone know what happens if an elderly person is rushed in but family aren't immediately available? I would, of course, get the next flight home if that happened but it would take me eleven hours plus just travelling even if I got an immediate flight. What happens to her in the meantime?
Part of me says I am worrying over a million to one chance of an emergency but the other part says it is bound to happen when we are away!
I am seeing my Admiral Nurse next week to discuss options with her and mum. I would prefer her not to go into a respite home as it seems a shame to take her away from familiar surroundings, her friends, routine and day centre on the off chance she may need an emergency trip to hospital but I want her to be safe.
Anyone have any experiences - preferably not too scary! Or any thoughts that I can ponder?
Thank you
My mum was diagnosed with Alzheimer's and vascular dementia about a year ago. She lives alone and is in her 80s. She has diabetes and had a heart attack two years ago.
I usually do mum's weekly shop and cover all her appointments plus I do her weekly medication box (she is on tablets for her heart as well as issues relating to her diabetes). I have been doing this since her heart attack and the dementia has added more in the way of appointments and, of course, phonecalls checking and double checking little things with me. Other than that she manages very well at the moment thankfully.
We want to get a holiday booked for the Easter school holidays to take our son, who is seven, away for a couple of weeks. We need a break - mum had a health issue before Christmas that meant seven appointments in five days and I now feel shattered. We plan to visit Disney world, Florida as our son is the perfect age now. The thought of it is keeping me going at the moment if I am honest as my husband works away from home two to three times a week so I have to split myself between mum and son very carefully at that time!
Mum is very capable of looking after herself. Luckily she still manages to cook and clean (with a weekly clean of the bits she misses by me!). She lives in sheltered housing where she uses the communal lounge every day to have a cuppa and a chat with her neighbours for an hour or so (since she got her diagnosis she took on board what the memory clinic said about meeting people to keep the wheels going). She goes to the local day centre one day a week and has a daily visit from a district nurse as she is insulin dependent for her diabetes.
When we go on holiday I can arrange for a grocery delivery each week, the day centre have said she can have an extra day a week if she wants it and I can do her medication boxes up front. I have a couple of cousins who are happy to phone every couple of days for a chat - they live over a hundred miles away so visiting isn't on but they call her regularly anyway so increasing that isn't a problem for the 16 days we are away.
But, I am really worried about what happens if she has a fall or needs emergency help. She has a lifeline pendant but what happens if she goes to A&E and has no one to sit with her? The last two times she was taken to hospital (a year in between thankfully) it was eleven hours in the A&E department before they found a bed and one of those occasions was when she had a heart attack. Last time she was rushed in she needed the loo and it took me two attempts to find someone who knew where a wheelchair was so I could get her to the toilet. As she's deaf and partially sighted I dread to think how she would manage with no one at her side.
Does anyone know what happens if an elderly person is rushed in but family aren't immediately available? I would, of course, get the next flight home if that happened but it would take me eleven hours plus just travelling even if I got an immediate flight. What happens to her in the meantime?
Part of me says I am worrying over a million to one chance of an emergency but the other part says it is bound to happen when we are away!
I am seeing my Admiral Nurse next week to discuss options with her and mum. I would prefer her not to go into a respite home as it seems a shame to take her away from familiar surroundings, her friends, routine and day centre on the off chance she may need an emergency trip to hospital but I want her to be safe.
Anyone have any experiences - preferably not too scary! Or any thoughts that I can ponder?
Thank you