Look girls - and it is only from my perspective and believe me I have been in this position with my Mother and Brother's deaths in the recent years but how about ditching all the vitriol and just concentrating on making the day(s) the most tranquil and best you can for your Men. Surely just the sadness of your husbands' last few years is enough stress for the time being without creating more by "putting words into other people's mouths". Silly people, their loss I always say (remember I'm that Saint!). Maybe we just have more "soul" than these thoughtless ones and that is the way they have spent their lives - only really thinking about themselves and their feelings. We can't change them.
You probably will not want to communicate through the ether with me anymore but I say, "cast not the first stone etc" and "judge not lest ye be judge". Of course you are hurting and anything like callous words will feel far worse now but try to remember the better days - how would you have responded to these silly people then? Probably just ignored them. The not responding to the request to know whether they will require refreshments after the Funeral if they are even going to be there is just rude - there you are - they are just silly, rude, callous, uncaring people - not true friends. Who needs them? End of Sermon!
You probably will not want to communicate through the ether with me anymore but I say, "cast not the first stone etc" and "judge not lest ye be judge". Of course you are hurting and anything like callous words will feel far worse now but try to remember the better days - how would you have responded to these silly people then? Probably just ignored them. The not responding to the request to know whether they will require refreshments after the Funeral if they are even going to be there is just rude - there you are - they are just silly, rude, callous, uncaring people - not true friends. Who needs them? End of Sermon!