advice please

Helly68

Registered User
Mar 12, 2018
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Indeed they do. I am getting quite tired of being typecast as bossy daughter. Mind you, that's maybe better than the nurse who thought I was his wife the other night in A&E.
I mean, no one looks their best at 4am,but I didnt realise I looked that old....
Oh dear.
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
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Southampton
Indeed they do. I am getting quite tired of being typecast as bossy daughter. Mind you, that's maybe better than the nurse who thought I was his wife the other night in A&E.
I mean, no one looks their best at 4am,but I didnt realise I looked that old....
Oh dear.
because of the age gap[19yrs] i am anything from wife, daughter, friend niece. i tend to let them dig themselves in a hole, feel awkward then i will correct them. its just very funny to watch and the horror in their face when they are corrected. my daughter is only 28 so she gets assumed as the grand-daughter rather than daughter. all the need to do is ask.
 

Wildflowerlady

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Sep 30, 2019
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because of the age gap[19yrs] i am anything from wife, daughter, friend niece. i tend to let them dig themselves in a hole, feel awkward then i will correct them. its just very funny to watch and the horror in their face when they are corrected. my daughter is only 28 so she gets assumed as the grand-daughter rather than daughter. all the need to do is ask.
We get this too as 17 year gap between us. I do find it amusing at times and as you say the look of surprise or embarrassment when they realise their mistake is sometimes priceless. Just to let you and @MaNaAk know little dog came through her operation yesterday ok and recovery well ate her tea fine. Not so happy this morning as I had to put a 'cone of shame' on as she started to scratch the ear that had been done yesterday.
 

jennifer1967

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Mar 15, 2020
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Southampton
im
We get this too as 17 year gap between us. I do find it amusing at times and as you say the look of surprise or embarrassment when they realise their mistake is sometimes priceless. Just to let you and @MaNaAk know little dog came through her operation yesterday ok and recovery well ate her tea fine. Not so happy this morning as I had to put a 'cone of shame' on as she started to scratch the ear that had been done yesterday.
glad the dog is ok and yes i remember the cone of shame. you have to protect her ear while its healing up. the dog will thank you for it. at least shes eating. i just like watching them squirm.
 

jennifer1967

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Mar 15, 2020
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Southampton
my husband is diabetic and therefore should have the diabetic eye screening. he has a cataract but they are not doing anything as he cant sit still up to the tester that you put your chin on. with diabetic screening, its the same sort of machine and he cant do it. phones to explain that he cant manage with the equipment, they asked if he goes out. he can go out or one of the kids will go with him but that doesnt mean he can use the tested equipment. the person has to ask the doctor. he has a COPD review so my daughter is going down for that with him. i know the test is important although theyve taken me off the list but this young man sounded totally bored.
 

GillP

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Aug 11, 2021
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my husband is diabetic and therefore should have the diabetic eye screening. he has a cataract but they are not doing anything as he cant sit still up to the tester that you put your chin on. with diabetic screening, its the same sort of machine and he cant do it. phones to explain that he cant manage with the equipment, they asked if he goes out. he can go out or one of the kids will go with him but that doesnt mean he can use the tested equipment. the person has to ask the doctor. he has a COPD review so my daughter is going down for that with him. i know the test is important although theyve taken me off the list but this young man sounded totally bored.
My husband has his diabetic eye screening soon and I’m dreading it. Not sure how he’ll cope with the eye drops. He also needs cataract surgery and there has been talk of using general anaesthesia for this. On a waiting list....
 

jennifer1967

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Mar 15, 2020
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Southampton
My husband has his diabetic eye screening soon and I’m dreading it. Not sure how he’ll cope with the eye drops. He also needs cataract surgery and there has been talk of using general anaesthesia for this. On a waiting list....
he asked about general anaesthetic and they refused as they dont do it just local so they refused to do anything. its only small but they wanted to ensure he stayed still and he cant do that. i know about the drops. i had the screening until i became housebound then it stopped. if your husband has dark eyes, brown etc then they may well have to put more than one lot of drops in. i normally get at least them twice.
 

Helly68

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Mar 12, 2018
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@jennifer1967 - I feel your pain and frustration.
The hospital told me they had a real job getting Daddy to be still enough to insert the wire for the pacemaker. Even after a sedative. I had to sit with him for a while, prior to the procedure to stop him as he waited a long time and was threatening to leave. It is hard, as Daddy hates me to mention dementia, but I try to let the staff know subtly. They must see it a lot, but it amazes me how many services are clueless about dementia.
 

GillP

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Aug 11, 2021
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he asked about general anaesthetic and they refused as they dont do it just local so they refused to do anything. its only small but they wanted to ensure he stayed still and he cant do that. i know about the drops. i had the screening until i became housebound then it stopped. if your husband has dark eyes, brown etc then they may well have to put more than one lot of drops in. i normally get at least them twice.
If they won’t give him general anaesthesia there is no way he will remain still. He has blue eyes and always coped before so fingers crossed.
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
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Southampton
You probably know this, but if you need a sight test and can’t get to an optician Specsavers have a visiting service. I used it for mum
i use the home service of specsavers and while they were out to me they said that they will come when my husband has to have a sight test. it was the diabetic screening eye test we were having problems with as he cant sit at their testing equipment.
 

nita

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Dec 30, 2011
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Essex
@jennifer1967 , not the same thing, but my brother has trouble keeping his head in the right position to have the photo taken of his retina. This is due to the curvature of his spine and his head naturally inclines one way. The optometrist took the photo while the dispensing optician held his head in place. Would that be a solution for your husband? Not sure how long diabetic screening takes.
 

jennifer1967

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Mar 15, 2020
23,142
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Southampton
@jennifer1967 , not the same thing, but my brother has trouble keeping his head in the right position to have the photo taken of his retina. This is due to the curvature of his spine and his head naturally inclines one way. The optometrist took the photo while the dispensing optician held his head in place. Would that be a solution for your husband? Not sure how long diabetic screening takes.
i think it makes him feel sick and dizzy. he couldnt manage it when they were assessing his cataract. they do your pressures etc, have drops in and a few other bits. my son went with him for cataract and he still couldnt manage it after several attempts from the specialist eye specialist. he can have a cataract operation because he may not keep still.
 

nita

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Dec 30, 2011
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Essex
My mother (with Alzheimer's) had a sedative before she went into the MRI scanner. She was very sleepy anyway at that stage. Not sure if that would be appropriate for your husband's cataract as it could knock him right out or, the opposite case, it might not work.

It is a long time anyway before they remove cataracts. I had the assessment and they said it wasn't bad enough. I can hardly see out of my right eye (with glasses) but I think you have to not be able to read any of the lines on the chart before they'll consider doing it. I'm dreading it anyway because I had a retinal detachment in that eye and apparently the cataract operation has a small risk of that happening anyway.
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
23,142
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Southampton
My mother (with Alzheimer's) had a sedative before she went into the MRI scanner. She was very sleepy anyway at that stage. Not sure if that would be appropriate for your husband's cataract as it could knock him right out or, the opposite case, it might not work.

It is a long time anyway before they remove cataracts. I had the assessment and they said it wasn't bad enough. I can hardly see out of my right eye (with glasses) but I think you have to not be able to read any of the lines on the chart before they'll consider doing it. I'm dreading it anyway because I had a retinal detachment in that eye and apparently the cataract operation has a small risk of that happening anyway.
oh dear @nita he has COPD as well so they are not happy about sedation because the airways are narrower. my s-i-l has to have injections into her eye i think once a month. i wouldnt fancy that either. shes 79 now but she will lose her sight if she doesnt have them. goodluck to you and i hope it helps. thanks for the support as well.