Hi I'm after a bit of advice really on my dad's behalf. We strongly suspect my mum has dementia. She has been to the GP and then onto seeing a neurologist - she had an MRI scan done and diagnosed with "water on the brain" (sorry I can't remember the medical term for it). She had a lumber puncture done and when they last saw the consultant he said the last option was to have a shunt put in which she absolutely refuses to have done which I can't really blame her for to be totally honest. My dad asked if there was a possibility it could be anything else ie dementia and the consultant said that he didn't think it could be anything else. We are now at a loss as to what to do next - I've said he needs go to back to the GP and ask for a second opinion, she's totally changed from what she used to be like - memory problems, mobility problems, irrational behaviour and volatility - she can flip out at the slightest thing. My dad is doing a lot of the cooking and cleaning now but I'm worried about him too as he's really struggling with her behaviour -saying it's grinding him down and that he feels trapped. Both of them are retired and have no other interests outside the home (he enjoyed cycling and they both used to go walking which because of her mobility they can't do any more and with the cycling mum has managed to stop him from doing that) . I've done the AD 8 questionnaire and she ticks all the boxes except for maybe one. Help!!!! I'm sorry it's so long but I'm worried about both of them - I have a sister and brother and we all agree that there's something not right.
Hi
My dad has some fluid in his ventricles , brain atrophy as well and the term I think is NPH but other things can cause this as well , he is today after a very long time waiting, having a lumbar puncture and some memory assessments. It is a very rare for of dementia. They will then I guess let us know what the options are for dad and yes that may involve a shunt too. I can say that shine charity are very good if you have not come across them before for advice and information. The fluid builds up and as it cannot drain away it causes cognitive problems because the fluid blocks the signals is the simple understanding I have of it , reasoning and thinking basically dementia type symptoms which some days are more pronounced than other days and in dads case his walking is very different to that of someone with normal ageing , he has had a few tumbles , he gets light headed and has vertigo, short term memory, apathy, lack of empathy, sometimes a bit nasty as well, It took us a while to realise that this was a kind of dementia illness but having accepted that it probably is and we can only do so much has made it easier in some ways.
I find trying to think practically is helpful sometimes. We had the OT out and made the house safer with grab rails etc took a few attempts as dad kept saying he was fine lol. Dad won't use a walker just a stick and he used to love walking and going the gym but those things are not possible now. He would not entertain a wheelchair and I would probably get a right telling off if I suggested it but it would give him the opportunity of seeing he outside world ? If you dad cooks all the time would he like to have a meal delivered ? Best thing I guess would be to have a chat with him and see what you can work out together.
It sounds like your Dad needs a break. Is there anyone who could help with housework? We have managed to have a cleaner. Me and my siblings all still work and we don't all live nearby either. I am guessing your mum would be resistant to anything but that doesn't mean you can't have a try. There is a really good thing on here if you haven't seen it for communication and memory problems . Honestly that has really helped change how we go about things. Someone might post the link. When my mum was ill , my dad joined the gym, he made friends and used to enjoy going, gave him a break. Would your dad like to perhaps do something similar ? and someone come and sit with your mum for an hour? Just a thought. After mum passed away Dad carried on with it and still has friends who phone and chat with him.
Just a thought . We keep trying different things. Take Care you are definitely not alone on here ?