My partner returned home on Monday after a week’s respite. This was the first time I had arranged respite as I had put it off because of the need for isolation which is now no longer mandatory as long as testing is done.
I had looked forward to some freedom and to a large degree I enjoyed the break and caught up with sleep and visited a friend for a few days. I worried that he would not settle and become agitated but the care home reported that he slept well and was quite settled. He apparently told them he was missing the dog….don’t think I got a mention!
When I collected him he seemed quite bewildered and that day and the next slept a lot which is normal anyway. I think he is slightly more confused than before but his dementia is moving on quite quickly now so maybe that would have been the case at home too. Unfortunately he has started getting up during the night every night and wandering around the house. This was happening before the respite but it has wiped out any benefit as I’m so tired again. I thought the respite would give us both a break and enable me to have him at home for longer. I almost feel that it has made me feel worse about the whole situation as I can’t see myself carrying on for too much longer. My friends tell me it’s time but having seen the reality of him in a care home the guilt is huge. So in a way it’s been a reality check and the reality is bleak.
I had looked forward to some freedom and to a large degree I enjoyed the break and caught up with sleep and visited a friend for a few days. I worried that he would not settle and become agitated but the care home reported that he slept well and was quite settled. He apparently told them he was missing the dog….don’t think I got a mention!
When I collected him he seemed quite bewildered and that day and the next slept a lot which is normal anyway. I think he is slightly more confused than before but his dementia is moving on quite quickly now so maybe that would have been the case at home too. Unfortunately he has started getting up during the night every night and wandering around the house. This was happening before the respite but it has wiped out any benefit as I’m so tired again. I thought the respite would give us both a break and enable me to have him at home for longer. I almost feel that it has made me feel worse about the whole situation as I can’t see myself carrying on for too much longer. My friends tell me it’s time but having seen the reality of him in a care home the guilt is huge. So in a way it’s been a reality check and the reality is bleak.