I know all the things we are not to do - dont say dont, dont confront deflect etc. But I am finding it increasingly difficult to cope. My husband mood has changed. As his memory declines and he finds it more difficult to find the words he is becoming more anxious and difficult to manage. He feeling that I am bossing him and telling him what to do and I am but more because somethings he is doing are now dangerous and also somethings I 'd hoped he would like to do and enjoy. But anything I suggest is wrong. He is constantly moving things and packing things. I know that there is no point in constantly telling him we are going no where but it really is taking its toll on my mental health. This is no longer a home just a place where currently we both live. He is slowly destroying the garden - dig holes, pulls up and cuts things that dont need cutting. He was already cross with me so he went and sat in full sun. i put a chair in the shade for him but he would see me in hell first before he sat in it. Oh and he probably doesnt know its even me. Often after a 'row' he will tell me how the carer was rude to him. This is the bit i find hard - the fact that you could say a row was normal between a married couple and then its not because he doesnt know it me. Sometime I think its an act but I am sure we all go through this. At the moment he has gone outside the front door and is sitting in the shade - unless he has wandered off. I'd better go and check. And this very action will not go down well. I send my love and hope to all of you caring for a SO with dementia - its the saddest and loneliest job in the world xxx