Hi everyone, I'm new here so please accept my apologies if I'm repeating questions that have already been asked!
We relocated to the Scottish Borders from the southeast nearly 6 months ago. We brought my mum with us as I knew she was having memory problems and I also knew that no one else would step in and help her as whatever my mum has needed over the years, it's always fallen to me. Mum currently lives with us (husband, 2 kids and me) and was diagnosed with Alzheimer's dementia just before Christmas. Her GP, mental health nurse and Borders Carers Group have been really supportive BUT I had a conversation today with a lady from Social Services who basically said that if my mum says that she wants to continue living with us and doesn't want to move into suitable accommodation, then I have to accept it. Surely that can't be right?! I've got a family, work, a house and hopefully a lot of years left in me and although I love my mum and want what's best for her, I do also have a life to live. I've never been free of the responsibility for looking out for my mum despite having a brother. The strain of having mum here can be intolerable at times and is causing not only me stress and tears but also my 15 year old daughter. I have explained this until I'm blue in the face but social services in particular seem totally jaded and really couldn't have cared less! Has anyone else been through this and come out the other side?!
We relocated to the Scottish Borders from the southeast nearly 6 months ago. We brought my mum with us as I knew she was having memory problems and I also knew that no one else would step in and help her as whatever my mum has needed over the years, it's always fallen to me. Mum currently lives with us (husband, 2 kids and me) and was diagnosed with Alzheimer's dementia just before Christmas. Her GP, mental health nurse and Borders Carers Group have been really supportive BUT I had a conversation today with a lady from Social Services who basically said that if my mum says that she wants to continue living with us and doesn't want to move into suitable accommodation, then I have to accept it. Surely that can't be right?! I've got a family, work, a house and hopefully a lot of years left in me and although I love my mum and want what's best for her, I do also have a life to live. I've never been free of the responsibility for looking out for my mum despite having a brother. The strain of having mum here can be intolerable at times and is causing not only me stress and tears but also my 15 year old daughter. I have explained this until I'm blue in the face but social services in particular seem totally jaded and really couldn't have cared less! Has anyone else been through this and come out the other side?!