Hi, I wondered if anyone could offer some advice please ? My father, 91, is currently living in a retirement care home where he has been for around 3.1/2 years. He was diagonised with dementia around 6 yars ago, although the signs were present a few years earlier to be honest. To be honest, my sister and I had concerns about the level of care dad was receiving as there often didnt seem to be any staff present in the lounge were my dad sits. It wasnt unusual for us to run and get help when a resident tried to walk and looked unsteady. We asked for a desk to be put in room, rather then in dining room were stafff did paperwork. Things came to a head late last year when a resident "attacked" aresident one night in her room and she was admitted to hospital. The home subsquently failed the CQC report on all levels. My sister and I began to look for another home for my father just before lockdown. We have seen my father twice through a window but have remained in contact with the home, taking biscuits ect every few weeks and were told my father was fine. Then last week, I had a call to say my father had had a fall and was taken to hospital. During the afternoon, my sister received a call from the hospital saying the care home had refused to take my father back saying he was aggressive., clmbing over chairs and sitting on people. He had macular degeneration when he went into the home and we dont know the state of his eyesight now. This came as a complete shock and we both went into panic mode. Later that afternoon, we were phoned again to say dad was now back at care home. We were told the manager would ring next day. She didnt. In the meantime, "Find me a home" contacted us and told us they had 3 possible homes that may take dad. My sister contacted the manager and we were told a report had been done on dad by the mental health team and i was thought dad needed more care. She admitted that she should have told us and "held her hands up". The homes suggested by Find me a home (something to do with hospital I believe) asked for copy of report but the care home couldnt find a copy and mental health team had no knowledge either. Eventually, after several phone calls my sister tracked down a lady that said she had seen my father. Im not sure how this lady is to be honest., I believe a social worker? The homes suggest then refused to take my dad based on the care home managers opinion. So, now the social worker has arranged an "assestment" for tomorrow and then we will have a zoom meeting with her, the manager of the home and both my sister and myself. A EMI home has been mentioned and we have been told this will be approx 3 times the price we are paying now. My dad is self funding. The social working did mention possible help in funding this which isnt means tested. So, sorry for the ramble but I think both myself and my sister are very naive and feel this is all out of our hands now. Especially with Covid, as we havent really seen dad for 7 months. We took a long time and visited many homes before settling on the home my dad (and my late mother) went to and now dad will go somewhere we havent vetted. Any help and advice is more than welcome. Thank you
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