Another question that I cannot get my head around...
- Thread starter maryjoan
- Start date
This is something I have wondered about....
My OH had an appointment at the memory clinic in Feb 2017, but nothing since at all. I am assuming that is because it is vascular dementia which cannot be treated. At the time the specialist was very off hand with us - we were only in there a few minutes, had a look at the brain scan, and that was that..... I tried to engage him in questions - but nothing was forthcoming.
Thankfully, I found you guys or else I wouldn't know a thing about what is going on.
Sometimes, I even wonder am I going crazy, because OH even when less affected than now, has never, ever spoken about the diagnosis, shown no interest whatsoever in his own welfare, or mine for that matter..... given the lack of medical involvement, I do wonder in my darkest moments, am I making it all up !!!
My OH had an appointment at the memory clinic in Feb 2017, but nothing since at all. I am assuming that is because it is vascular dementia which cannot be treated. At the time the specialist was very off hand with us - we were only in there a few minutes, had a look at the brain scan, and that was that..... I tried to engage him in questions - but nothing was forthcoming.
Thankfully, I found you guys or else I wouldn't know a thing about what is going on.
Sometimes, I even wonder am I going crazy, because OH even when less affected than now, has never, ever spoken about the diagnosis, shown no interest whatsoever in his own welfare, or mine for that matter..... given the lack of medical involvement, I do wonder in my darkest moments, am I making it all up !!!
No, of course you are not making it all up.
Your OHs reaction is absolutely classic. Mum never talked about her diagnosis either and Im sure she had totally forgotten about it. She was also completely unaware of her problems and insisted there was nothing wrong with her when even a cursory glance would tell you that something was very amiss. Even OH, who is very well orientated in the here and now and is aware that he has problems, is still unaware of the extent of them all. He has carers in to help him wash and dress, but at weekends (when there are no carers) he still thinks he can do it perfectly well himself.
The lack of interest in your well being is also par for the course. Empathy is lost very early on and the person with dementia is usually completely unable to see things from anyone elses view point. Eventually their world narrows and narrows so that they are only able to see their own wants needs and comforts.
you lucky mine was over the phone as had mri year before but did send the alz. society book my husband doesnt talk about it as he wants to just get on with it. i think he views it that he has it and theres nothing he can do about it[vascular as well] so why go on about it. after sorted poa i tend to agree and deal with things as they arise. dont know whats the future so why worry too much about it
I think I worry because I feel so cheated. I have been married twice, the second one was horrendous, and is now deceased. I met OH ten years ago, and thought all my christmasses had come at once. We were so suited, so happy, but it did not last long. Dementia and a multitude of health problems soon came along, and I have barely any happy memories to sustain me through what is going on now............
It means Memory Clinic. Could people luse fewer abbreviations that others might not understand? The alphabet soup includes PWD, OH, GP, CH, DWP, SS, DT, and other indigestible ingredients!
There is a list of abbreviations which are commonly used -
forum.alzheimers.org.uk
Abbreviations List and Dementia Talking Point Jargon
LIST OF ABBREVIATIONS SEEN IN TALKING POINT, AND SOME TALKING POINT JARGON Here is a list of some abbreviations which crop up in Talking Point (TP) postings (and at the end a small "Jargon" section). They include some medical terms, some terms to do with the care/benefits labyrinth, a few...
forum.alzheimers.org.uk
My partner and I have had similar issues and silences from GP etc but since her diagnosis with Alzheimer’s 5 years ago she has only been invited in for one annual MOT. It is as though she is of no more interest to them. ?
Why not try fitting a GPS tracker to the bike (or better still his clothing) a quick search on eBay came up with "Pets Smart Mini GPS Tracker With Battery Anti-Lost Waterproof Bluetooth Tracer" at less than £4 it's worth a try.
When I was caring for children everyone was obsessed with bowel movements. It was common practice to write in their home book. ‘ Had a shower, teeth brushed, BO.’
BO was an abbreviation of bowel open.
It wasn’t until a parent came in to complain about its lovely clean child being accused of having body odour, the penny dropped ! When you use abbreviations you may not always be communicating what you think,
'Proper' pet trackers are £100+. I bought one a few years ago - it was useless.
The main problems are 1) short range, 2) the battery in the bit that attaches to the pet's collar (or to a person!) needs charging every couple of days, 3) the things barely work at all unless there is a clear line of sight, i.e. no buildings between you and the thing you're tracking, 4) some only show a vague location - useless for small pets but might be OK for a person.
But there are 'find my phone' apps and vaious other trackers that work through the person's phone.
Maybe I can get my cats to carry phones - it would actually be cheaper
The main problems are 1) short range, 2) the battery in the bit that attaches to the pet's collar (or to a person!) needs charging every couple of days, 3) the things barely work at all unless there is a clear line of sight, i.e. no buildings between you and the thing you're tracking, 4) some only show a vague location - useless for small pets but might be OK for a person.
But there are 'find my phone' apps and vaious other trackers that work through the person's phone.
Maybe I can get my cats to carry phones - it would actually be cheaper
Cats can’t carry mobile phones.'Proper' pet trackers are £100+. I bought one a few years ago - it was useless.
The main problems are 1) short range, 2) the battery in the bit that attaches to the pet's collar (or to a person!) needs charging every couple of days, 3) the things barely work at all unless there is a clear line of sight, i.e. no buildings between you and the thing you're tracking, 4) some only show a vague location - useless for small pets but might be OK for a person.
But there are 'find my phone' apps and vaious other trackers that work through the person's phone.
Maybe I can get my cats to carry phones - it would actually be cheaper
There is no network for them ! Mice have ‘EE’!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cats are hoping there will be less discrimination against them in the future!
Maybe someone can start a business called Catphone Warehouse. I would be interested. I looked into getting a cat tracker after one of ours went missing for 3 days in January. Having done a great deal of research I decided that none of the were good enough for what I wanted. Some were so expensive with monthly contracts so I didn’t bother.
