Hi All Thanks for letting me join,
Sorry for the long winded piece but I am at my wits end, I have been looking after parents both with dementia mum 87yrs worse than dad and he's 94yrs. I have been fighting with Social Services since my mum was diagnosed last year April. They both had an assessment and a financial one, due to them owning their own home and small amount of savings they don't seem interested and leaving all aspects of their care to me to put into place. I do have both LPA for both parents.
I managed to provide a paid private Homecare carers with me helping also to look after them, first was just once a day then gradually moved up to 3 times a day, 1hr in the morning 1hr lunch then half hr evening. but after 4 months my mum deteriorated quite quickly, she became quiet violent towards the carer and twice towards me which was most upsetting. I found myself even with homecare going in spending a lot of time running around after them, either shopping, washing, and as mum had sundowners going in through the night as she would ring me asking for help as dad might have fallen and couldn't get up as he was getting worse mainly mobility side with some memory loss. many a time i would turn up at night with all lights on heaters on full and cooker hob on with pans near by (fire hazard). So after considerable thought and pleading with SS to step in which they didn't, I decided to put both parents into respite self-funding in local residential with dementia unit care home for 4weeks with the plan if they settle for it to become permanent. I was not able to carry on looking after them safely and work and also I have a husband that needs looking after.
The question is,-- if they don't settle but they both don't have capacity to make decisions can Social Services over ride my decision as LPA and send them back home if they both want to go home?
I have talked to the doctor and due to the fact they are self-funding at present for another 3 month with cash savings then the property will come into play, they live in a rural location 3 miles from nearest town and amenities shops, with no transport except me, they would not be save to live back home as the care they both need between them is 24/7 and there is no local homecare available to cover their area. I have also been told the care home I have chosen their fees are above Social Services ceiling rate, which means once part funding or full funding comes into play they will need to be moved 23 miles away to a nursing home of SS choice as i'm not able finically to pay top up fees. I'm finding Social Services are not helping because my parents are mainly self-funding at this time and it was me who placed them in the home. I can't get another financial assessment with them in a care home, until they either settle or not.
Sorry for the long winded piece but I am at my wits end, I have been looking after parents both with dementia mum 87yrs worse than dad and he's 94yrs. I have been fighting with Social Services since my mum was diagnosed last year April. They both had an assessment and a financial one, due to them owning their own home and small amount of savings they don't seem interested and leaving all aspects of their care to me to put into place. I do have both LPA for both parents.
I managed to provide a paid private Homecare carers with me helping also to look after them, first was just once a day then gradually moved up to 3 times a day, 1hr in the morning 1hr lunch then half hr evening. but after 4 months my mum deteriorated quite quickly, she became quiet violent towards the carer and twice towards me which was most upsetting. I found myself even with homecare going in spending a lot of time running around after them, either shopping, washing, and as mum had sundowners going in through the night as she would ring me asking for help as dad might have fallen and couldn't get up as he was getting worse mainly mobility side with some memory loss. many a time i would turn up at night with all lights on heaters on full and cooker hob on with pans near by (fire hazard). So after considerable thought and pleading with SS to step in which they didn't, I decided to put both parents into respite self-funding in local residential with dementia unit care home for 4weeks with the plan if they settle for it to become permanent. I was not able to carry on looking after them safely and work and also I have a husband that needs looking after.
The question is,-- if they don't settle but they both don't have capacity to make decisions can Social Services over ride my decision as LPA and send them back home if they both want to go home?
I have talked to the doctor and due to the fact they are self-funding at present for another 3 month with cash savings then the property will come into play, they live in a rural location 3 miles from nearest town and amenities shops, with no transport except me, they would not be save to live back home as the care they both need between them is 24/7 and there is no local homecare available to cover their area. I have also been told the care home I have chosen their fees are above Social Services ceiling rate, which means once part funding or full funding comes into play they will need to be moved 23 miles away to a nursing home of SS choice as i'm not able finically to pay top up fees. I'm finding Social Services are not helping because my parents are mainly self-funding at this time and it was me who placed them in the home. I can't get another financial assessment with them in a care home, until they either settle or not.