Welcome to Dementia Talking Point! Find out more and say hello.

[SophieD]

Welcome to Dementia Talking Point

If you have dementia, or care for someone who does, you're very welcome to join our community and get support from others. Find out more about how to join and say hi to our friendly community on this discussion!

Finding out more

If you've got questions about how to use Dementia Talking Point click on these links below.

• You can find answers to frequently asked questions here.
• Our Help videos will show you how to navigate the different areas of Dementia Talking Point.
  
• We also have a Quick Guide explaining how to use Dementia Talking Point including logging in, posting, replying, checking private messages and searching.
• Also we recommend having a read through our Guidelines which are some useful tips and things to remember when posting.

Connecting with others

Head over to our list of forums to find people who are in a similar situation, people at a similar stage of dementia or an information topic that interests you.

Here are some tips on how to post a reply or start your own discussion...

1. When you're in a forum, look for the blue "Post New Thread" or "Reply" buttons at the top or bottom of discussions

2. To start a discussion, type a title, add your message and choose 'Create Thread'.

3. To add a reply just add your message and choose "Reply"

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Any questions?

If you have any questions about using Dementia Talking Point, you can email us on talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk or Use our Contact Form - we're here to help.

Saying hello

This is our welcome thread - the place many members start. Our volunteer hosts and regular members are here to say hello to you and to welcome you to our community.

Why not tell us a little about your experience and how you'd like Dementia Talking Point to help you?

Whatever you're facing today, we hope you find our community to be helpful and supportive.

Sophie

 

[marbak]

Hi everyone

My mum was sectioned 8 weeks ago( pyschosis about her neighbours) and diagnosed with moderate Alzheimers - we knew there were dementia traits but the diagnosis always comes as a shock!
She is in complete denial of everything and feels there has been a conspiracy against her from neighbours and the GP.
The adult mental unit where she is placed is very good as are the staff and meds are working well.
However Mum wants to go home and so we are in a process of thinking about home trials knowing full well it will be probably be residential dementia care for her.
It's just a roller coaster of emotions and utterly exhausting adjusting to visiting her and keeping a conversation going about the future.
Very sad times but I look forward to the support of the group

 

[nae sporran]

Hullo and welcome to DTP @marbak.
I don't know much about the problems you are having with residential care, but denial and difficult conversations are something I think we can all relate to and empathise with. You will find the support and advice you are looking for here, so keep posting and update us on your progress or just let off steam in your own thread when you are ready.

 

[TracyS]

hi, I have just joined the group. My mum was diagnosed with Alzheimer's a year ago so I'm hoping to pick up some tips here from those with more experience and to share where I can.

 

[nae sporran]

Welcome to DTP @TracyS. I see you have already posted a couple of times, and you will find both advice and moral support here from many who are going through the same things. It will be nice to see you around, so keep posting.

 

[Yunosida]

Hello
Thk you for welcoming me in your group.

 

[Yunosida]

Hi
I am new here..
Wish to find out more of signs and symptons of dementia..
My husband is 58 this dec...but he is still working and active but his mood changes to be a quiet person.
I am quite upset seeing his changes

 

[karaokePete]

Hello @Yunosida and welcome to the forum. You have come to the right place for information and support.

The best thing to do in this situation is have a chat with your GP. Many treatable conditions, such as depression, stress, thyroid problems, vitamin deficiencies etc., can cause dementia like symptoms so it's important to have a check-up. Please don't cause additional stress by jumping to the immediate conclusion that it's dementia. On the other hand, if it is dementia then a diagnosis may open up support for you.

Here is a link to a Society Fact sheet about the diagnosis issue. Just click the second line to read or print the document

Assessment and diagnosis (426)
PDF printable version

 

[karaokePete]

Hello @TracyS and welcome from me too

I wonder if you may find any local support services like a memory café to be of some use. You can do a post code check to see what's available to you by following this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you

The full list of the very informative Factsheets can be found with this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list

If communicating becomes an issue, a few handy tips can be picked from the useful thread that can be reached with this link https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/threads/compassionate-communication-with-the-memory-impaired.30801/

 

[karaokePete]

Hello @marbak and welcome from me too

I wonder if you may find the list of the very informative Factsheets useful. It can be found with this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list
You will see that there are Factsheets that will help with things like getting care needs assessments, seeking residential care, deciding the level of care required and sorting out useful things like Wills, Power of Attorney etc., if any of that hasn't already been done. There is also a Dementia Guide in the list.

If communicating becomes an issue, a few handy tips can be picked from the useful thread that can be reached with this link https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/threads/compassionate-communication-with-the-memory-impaired.30801/

Now that you have found us I hope you will keep posting as the membership has vast collective knowledge and experience.

 

[Nadger]

Hello and thank you for the welcome into this wonderful group. I live with my partner, Alison of 27 years, and her parents. We have lived together as a unit for 23 of those years. My partner's nan passed away from Alzheimer's in 1996 and I helped nurse her to her passing. I moved in with them just after her passing. It is fair to say that I am no stranger to Dementia. The sad thing is that now, Alison's father has been diagnosed with Fronto Temporal Dementia. That was at the beginning of 2019. Looking back and understanding the traits of the disease, we think this has been about for at least 3 years, maybe 4. With the family's permission, I have joined the forum because we believe we can contribute, hopefully helping others along the way. We realise there is possibly a long way to go yet, but every person is different. Father-in-law ( I am not married to Alison, but am always referred to as the son-in-law ) is 81 years old and I believe it is unusual to be diagnosed at this age.

I look forward to reading posts and adding help where I can and possibly asking for advice as well along the way.

 

[canary]

Hello @Nadger and welcome to DTP.
Im sorry to hear about your partners nan and it must be hard for her to see her dad progressing too. FTD is actually not that unusual at your FILs age, its just that if you are talking about early onset, its the most common type of dementia at that age. FTD can be a bit of a challenge if you are used to Alzheimers, as the early stages can be quite different, predominantly behaviour related.

Do have a mooch around and feel free to join in the conversations, or start a new thread if you want to ask a question, or talk about something specific.

 

[Nadger]

Hello @Nadger and welcome to DTP.
Im sorry to hear about your partners nan and it must be hard for her to see her dad progressing too. FTD is actually not that unusual at your FILs age, its just that if you are talking about early onset, its the most common type of dementia at that age. FTD can be a bit of a challenge if you are used to Alzheimers, as the early stages can be quite different, predominantly behaviour related.

Do have a mooch around and feel free to join in the conversations, or start a new thread if you want to ask a question, or talk about something specific.

Thank you Canary. We are lucky in that, he has not developed the behaviour related problems. Look forward to joining in.

 

[Summers Day]

Hi i am caring for my husband who has just been diagnosed with dementia probably Alzheimer’s - he is being prescribed donepezil and I was wondering if anyone has experience of side effects of this drug
Thanks

 

[Bunpoots]

Hi @Summers Day welcome to the forum.

Lots of people here have loved ones on Donepezil and the side effects vary from person to person. I think if anything unwanted happens it tends to happen fairly quickly and side effects (if any) disappear as soon as the drug is stopped so just see how it goes. Most people have good results and nothing unexpected but it's good to be aware of potential problems.

 

[Summers Day]

Hi @Bunpoots - thank you for that reassurance - will be starting it next week so will see how it goes

 

[Bunpoots]

Hi @Bunpoots - thank you for that reassurance - will be starting it next week so will see how it goes

Hopefully all will be well. Let us know how you get on.

 

[trips3]

Hi Ive just joined here. My Dad has not been formerly diagnosed yet but he is definitely showing a lot of symptoms and just this morning got aggressive for the first time towards my mum. He is convinced she's having an affair with the man across the road and even went over there at 6.15 this morning to tell the mans girlfriend. He is threatening to go over there later to beat him to a pulp. My dad is 83 and also convinced my mum is trying to poison him and has for a few months now, refused anything she prepares for him unless he watches over her during the prep. He has been verbally abusing and making accusations mainly in the early hours of the morning but then seems normal during the day, but for the first time today I've listened to him quite matter of factly tell me what my mum has been up to for years. He is in total denial and blames my mum for everything. Mum doesn't feel comfortable on her own with him and we're worried he will carry out his threat with the man across the road. What on earth do we do??? All we've managed to get so far is the promise of a phone call from a Doctor tomorrow

 

[Shedrech]

hello @trips3
a warm welcome to DTP

such a worry for your mum and you

I see you have already opened a thread of your own to share these experiences and have some responses

 

[Trooper]

Hi
Mum moved In With us in June and she has Alzheimer’s.
She sold her house and put her money in a savings pot and has a regular income each month.
She kicked up such a fuss about paying us any money for her keep so I just thought I’d buy shopping a couple of times a month as I have joint bank account with her but now she is kicking up a fuss about this!
I gave up my little cleaning company to look after her and get the carers allowance but feel she should contribute a little
I now think we should ask her to pay a regular income each month to help out but don’t know what to say to her without a huge argument.
I must admit I am on a very short fuse
Please help