Worried about where I will live, can I be kicked out?

[Jennyyyy]

Hi

I am 38 years old and have never moved out (unusual situation I know but it's the truth).
My father went into a care home last year when my mother could no longer look after him.
He has Lewy Body Dementia and Parkinsons.
This is part funded by social services.

My mother has been "unwell" pretty much ever since he went in. She has had psychotic episodes, depression, very poor memory, confusion and countless UTIs.
She has been under the mental health team for about 7 months now and is getting worse not better.
I wonder if the problems have always been there but only come to light once Dad was taken out of the situation.
She has had some dementia testing but it came back inconclusive due to her high anxiety state.
She has had a CT scan which was clear and more recently an MRI which we are waiting to hear the results for.

My concern is, if she has to go into care somewhere down the line, whereas with Dad the house was disregarded, could I be made homeless?
As I said previously, it is my home and always has been. My partner of 18 years has also lived with us for 17.5 years.
For us to simply find somewhere else to live would not be straightforward.

Hopefully you can understand my anxiety over this situation.

Thanks

 

[Beate]

You're not going to fall under a mandatory disregard as you're neither a spouse, under 18, over 60 or incapacitated.

However, you can apply for a discretionary disregard as this has been your main and only home and you might be under threat of homelessness otherwise. You will have to be proactive about it though - social services will only consider if an application is made, and the outcome can be uncertain.

 

[nitram]

If you go for a discretionary disregard your case would be strengthen if you could prove that you have contributed financially in the repair/maintenance of the property. The amount would have to be in excess of the fair rental value.

If you can't obtain a discretionary disregard you could consider a DPA (deferred payment agreement) https://ukcareguide.co.uk/deferred-payment-schemes/
You would have to pay a fair rent.

 

[MaNaAk]

Hi

I am 38 years old and have never moved out (unusual situation I know but it's the truth).
My father went into a care home last year when my mother could no longer look after him.
He has Lewy Body Dementia and Parkinsons.
This is part funded by social services.

My mother has been "unwell" pretty much ever since he went in. She has had psychotic episodes, depression, very poor memory, confusion and countless UTIs.
She has been under the mental health team for about 7 months now and is getting worse not better.
I wonder if the problems have always been there but only come to light once Dad was taken out of the situation.
She has had some dementia testing but it came back inconclusive due to her high anxiety state.
She has had a CT scan which was clear and more recently an MRI which we are waiting to hear the results for.

My concern is, if she has to go into care somewhere down the line, whereas with Dad the house was disregarded, could I be made homeless?
As I said previously, it is my home and always has been. My partner of 18 years has also lived with us for 17.5 years.
For us to simply find somewhere else to live would not be straightforward.

Hopefully you can understand my anxiety over this situation.

Thanks

Hi

I am 38 years old and have never moved out (unusual situation I know but it's the truth).
My father went into a care home last year when my mother could no longer look after him.
He has Lewy Body Dementia and Parkinsons.
This is part funded by social services.

My mother has been "unwell" pretty much ever since he went in. She has had psychotic episodes, depression, very poor memory, confusion and countless UTIs.
She has been under the mental health team for about 7 months now and is getting worse not better.
I wonder if the problems have always been there but only come to light once Dad was taken out of the situation.
She has had some dementia testing but it came back inconclusive due to her high anxiety state.
She has had a CT scan which was clear and more recently an MRI which we are waiting to hear the results for.

My concern is, if she has to go into care somewhere down the line, whereas with Dad the house was disregarded, could I be made homeless?
As I said previously, it is my home and always has been. My partner of 18 years has also lived with us for 17.5 years.
For us to simply find somewhere else to live would not be straightforward.

Hopefully you can understand my anxiety over this situation.

Thanks

Dear Jenny,

If your in an unusual situation at 38 what does that make me at 54? Until one and a half weeks ago when dad suddenly passed away I was in the same situation except I also had two invisibles.

At the moment it sounds like you are caring for your dear mum as well as being a distant carer for your dear dad (still can't believe I am a full orphan) as Beate says you need to be proactive. It is when the finances reach £30000 that you need to think about applying for a property disregard. Meanwhile you need to show that you have invested in the house. Have you got Power Of Attorney? Have you got receipts for all the bills, paid for work done on the house and contributed towards maintenance? If so start organising the receipts to present to your authority or a solicitor.

Keep posting

MaNaAk

 

[MaNaAk]

Also please listen to Nitram who has given brilliant advice in the past and also the lovely Beate.

Still feeling a bit of grief as I write on hear this morning as morning is when it hits me most.

MaNaAk

 

[AliceA]

I hope you both get this sorted out. Families are expected to step up yet there is no support when they do as you both know. Start writing and enquiringly now. Try Adult Services too, tell them you may have to stop being Carers as it will make you homeless. This a scandal.

 

[Bunpoots]

I have to agree with @AliceA ...this is a scandle. What sort of society would forcibly remove someone from their home because their parent is seriously ill?

@Jennyyyy - I really hope you can get a property disregard.

 

[Cazcaz]

Hi

I am 38 years old and have never moved out (unusual situation I know but it's the truth).
My father went into a care home last year when my mother could no longer look after him.
He has Lewy Body Dementia and Parkinsons.
This is part funded by social services.

My mother has been "unwell" pretty much ever since he went in. She has had psychotic episodes, depression, very poor memory, confusion and countless UTIs.
She has been under the mental health team for about 7 months now and is getting worse not better.
I wonder if the problems have always been there but only come to light once Dad was taken out of the situation.
She has had some dementia testing but it came back inconclusive due to her high anxiety state.
She has had a CT scan which was clear and more recently an MRI which we are waiting to hear the results for.

My concern is, if she has to go into care somewhere down the line, whereas with Dad the house was disregarded, could I be made homeless?
As I said previously, it is my home and always has been. My partner of 18 years has also lived with us for 17.5 years.
For us to simply find somewhere else to live would not be straightforward.

Hopefully you can understand my anxiety over this situation.

Thanks

Can I ask what has happened since you posted this please?

I am worried I will end up in a similar situation and would love a bit of advice from someone who has been there ahead of me.

 

[Shedrech]

Hi @Cazcaz
Just to let you know that this thread is from 2019 and the thread starter hasn't been back to DTP since posting

 

[MaNaAk]

Can I ask what has happened since you posted this please?

I am worried I will end up in a similar situation and would love a bit of advice from someone who has been there ahead of me.

Dear @Cazcaz,

I was in the same situation and the wonderful @nitram gave the same advice. I collected receipts going back years which proved what I had invested in the house and how much I had cared for dad. Sadly dad passed away in June 2019 before his money ran out but you have to start collecting receipts now.

MaNaAk

PS: Don't forget that councils assess each situation on a separate basis. Could you be entitled to CHC for example or could you afford a top fee? Are you over 60?

 

[MaNaAk]

Hi @Cazcaz
Just to let you know that this thread is from 2019 and the thread starter hasn't been back to DTP since posting

Dear @Shedrech,

I'm not sure that @Cazcaz knows which thread you mean.

MaNaAk

 

[Palerider]

It doesn't matter when this thread started, it still serves a valid purposoe around disregard of a property.

there are a number of clauses for LA's to disregard a property the most significant is that you are over or at the age of 60. but if you are not then you need to contact the LA financial assessor and ask what appeal you should provide in order for them to make a decsion.

I was unlucky in dealing with my parents property because they had also taken out an equity release, and it wise to check for this because sometimes we don't know until we have to deal with property -it will show on the land register.

People often take out equity release bacause their pensions and life assurnace don't match the expenses of living. Also in the same token I cared for my mum as well as my dad for some 5 plus years in the same property and I am over 50 years of age and I own no other property.

In the end I had to approach the LA for disregard, because the situation I was in had become dire. Our family home is now sold and the equity release paid off. I rather stupidly put the remainder that was disregarded into mums account, which by virtue in law is not subject to the laws on deprivation of assets, when what I should have done is to purchase a property with the monies left over from the disregard of mums property. Now as matters stand I have to go back through the whole process of funding and liability of fees

 

[Cazcaz]

In the end I had to approach the LA for disregard, because the situation I was in had become dire. Our family home is now sold and the equity release paid off. I rather stupidly put the remainder that was disregarded into mums account, which by virtue in law is not subject to the laws on deprivation of assets, when what I should have done is to purchase a property with the monies left over from the disregard of mums property. Now as matters stand I have to go back through the whole process of funding and liability of fees

Pale rider, how did you get a disregard if you aren’t over 60? I take it you used your own savings to buy somewhere as you said you had no other property?

 

[Palerider]

Pale rider, how did you get a disregard if you aren’t over 60? I take it you used your own savings to buy somewhere as you said you had no other property?

I lived with my mum and cared for her for 5 years and the LA took that into account, but I had to ask if its was possible for disregard, the LA did not offer that I had to delve and ask for it. At the end of the day its at the LA's discression whether they give it if you don't fit any other relief, but if you have done everything you can and sacrificed other oppurtunities then ask the LA in principle for disregard, you can't own or be in any other dwelling place other than the place your are a carer

And no I am still renting because caring for my mum after dads pension got cut off ate into my own savings quite considerably -I even had to pay for the exterior of the house to be revamped at several thousand pounds. When I had to put mum into care it was on trust of the value of what was left until I asked for disregard

Ironically since then my sister died and I also had to pay for her funeral, it seems just as we get on our feet in olderage something else comes along to wipe out what we had tried to save.

 

[Cazcaz]

was in the same situation and the wonderful @nitram gave the same advice. I collected receipts going back years which proved what I had invested in the house and how much I had cared for dad. Sadly dad passed away in June 2019 before his money ran out but you have to start collecting receipts now.

MaNaAk

PS: Don't forget that councils assess each situation on a separate basis. Could you be entitled to CHC for example or could you afford a top fee? Are you over 60?

MaMaAk unfortunately for me my parents would not hear of me spending my money on their house. They felt/feel it was their property so they should fix it.
I am in my 40s.

 

[Cazcaz]

I lived with my mum and cared for her for 5 years and the LA took that into account, but I had to ask if its was possible for disregard, the LA did not offer that I had to delve and ask for it. At the end of the day its at the LA's discression whether they give it if you don't fit any other relief, but if you have done everything you can and sacrificed other oppurtunities then ask the LA in principle for disregard, you can't own or be in any other dwelling place other than the place your are a carer

And no I am still renting because caring for my mum after dads pension got cut off ate into my own savings quite considerably -I even had to pay for the exterior of the house to be revamped at several thousand pounds. When I had to put mum into care it was on trust of the value of what was left until I asked for disregard

Ironically since then my sister died and I also had to pay for her funeral, it seems just as we get on our feet in olderage something else comes along to wipe out what we had tried to save.

Can I ask,

How do you go about getting a disregard? Do I wait for the financial assessment and ask then or do I have to contact someone first? I am not yet at the point of needing to do so, I’d just like to know what to do when the time comes.
I have never lived away from my parents. I was waiting for my sister who’s autistic to find a job as I felt I couldn’t leave until she was settled. I was ready to move out 10 years ago, started looking at places....then mum developed a brain infection.....so I felt I had to stay at home help my dad look after my sister and increasingly my mum too. Now mum has Alzheimer’s and I’m unemployed. I don’t know what to do if mum ends up needing care.

 

[canary]

Hi @Cazcaz
Is your dad still living at home? If he is then the house will be definitely disregarded all the while he is living there. That would be organised at the financial assessment as its a mandatory disregard.
Similarly, your sister if she is recognised as being disabled. If your sister is living there, that would make it a mandatory disregard too.

In the meantime, perhaps you could look at whether you would be entitled to Carers Allowance. It sounds to me as though both your mum and your sister should be entitled to Attendance Allowance/PIP and if either of them do, this would qualify you for Carers Allowance.

 

[MaNaAk]

Hi @Cazcaz
Is your dad still living at home? If he is then the house will be definitely disregarded all the while he is living there. That would be organised at the financial assessment as its a mandatory disregard.
Similarly, your sister if she is recognised as being disabled. If your sister is living there, that would make it a mandatory disregard too.

In the meantime, perhaps you could look at whether you would be entitled to Carers Allowance. It sounds to me as though both your mum and your sister should be entitled to Attendance Allowance/PIP and if either of them do, this would qualify you for Carers Allowance.

Good morning @Cazcaz,

As @canary said you will be the property will be disregarded if you are caring for your dad. Have you ever paid rent to your parents as this is what I was asked?

MaNaAk

 

[Cazcaz]

Good morning @Cazcaz,

As @canary said you will be the property will be disregarded if you are caring for your dad. Have you ever paid rent to your parents as this is what I was asked?

MaNaAk

I pay a small rent, my parents don’t want me paying market value, they rather I saved a bit. So yes I pay something but not much. But being unemployed now I don’t save anything.

 

[canary]

Paying rent is irrelevant in your case @Cazcaz as you wont be living there on your own.

There are various categories of people who who will make the house disregarded all the while they are living in it. One is the spouse of the person who moves into a care home, and another one is a relative who is disabled.

As far as I can see, the house would be disregarded on two accounts, which would mean that it wouldnt have to be sold to pay for care home fees - the Local Authority will only be looking at your mums savings and will pay towards the fees, or perhaps pay all the fees, depending on her savings,