Care at home,no Health LPA

[witts1973]

I look after my mother in her home,I'm mums carer along with carers that come in to do her pad changes,I haven't got a health LPA and I'm wondering if that makes it easier for the LA to stick my mother in a home at some time,she has always wanted to stay at home but hasn't got those wishes recorded anywhere pre dementia after all who would think to do that,and it would be normal for somebody to want to stay at home anyway,who would wish to go in a home by their own choice.
She is well looked after and is bed bound in a hospital bed so doesn't wander and wont be able to break any bones.
A cynical side of me wonders if the LA might prefer her home to be sold to fund her care and me not being able to speak up as I don't have health LPA,I know for a fact after numerous conversations with our carers that it's common for a lot of people living alone to be kept at home in beds,I supsect a large amount of those are in LA housing so the LA haven't anything to benefit from those people.

 

[Beate]

Staying at home wishes can be overridden if a best interest decision is made for a care home, because as you say, no one will ever jump with joy at the idea of one. But usually the council are keen to keep people at home because care homes are expensive, and if you are there caring for her and saving them money, they would be mad to change the situation.

Having said that, I was always treated with more respect after I'd produced a copy of the health LPA with someone from the council or the NHS as they realised they couldn't just ignore me.

 

[Sirena]

SS are generally keen to choose the least restrictive option and will keep a person in their own home if at all possible. Since your mother not only has carers in, but also has you as a carer I doubt they would be interested in disrupting the status quo unless it clearly became against her best interests for some reason. I doubt a H&W LPA would make much difference either way.

 

[Marnie63]

I initially organised the Finance LPA before mum got dementia. It just made it easier for me to deal with her financial matters. Once she had dementia, I managed to have a conversation with her during one of her lucid moments (before the dementia advanced) and I quickly got the Health and Welfare one in place too. From my experience I would advise having both, if possible.

I had one very uncomfortable incident when mum went to a care home for a respite stay during a time when I was really struggling to cope. The social worker who was assigned at the time started talking about her going off permanently to a care home on the coast. Our home was a long way from the coast! Then when I realised after a few days how awful the respite home was (I now admit that a bit of it was that it really was awful, and that some of it was just because she wasn't getting the quality of care she'd had at home!), I decided to pull her out of there, but then the social worker said she was going to get a 'mental health advocate' involved. It then dawned on me that SS were in control, and without the Health and Welfare LPA I had little say. Fortunately I managed to retrieve her from the home fairly easily and the SW didn't follow through on her 'threat'. But it was a really horrid few days during which I thought I had lost mum to the system forever. I felt better once the second LPA was in place.

On the medical front, because we had a very good GP, I never had to use the Health LPA and I felt that all discussions with the GP and the DNs, and then during those last few days in hospital, were all handled fairly, so there was never any need to me to wave the LPA at them.

For someone like me, who wanted to keep mum at home for as long as possible, it was important to keep control. In hindsight, I think the SW meant well, but she didn't understand enough about our situation and it could so easily have turned into a nightmare.

 

[witts1973]

I initially organised the Finance LPA before mum got dementia. It just made it easier for me to deal with her financial matters. Once she had dementia, I managed to have a conversation with her during one of her lucid moments (before the dementia advanced) and I quickly got the Health and Welfare one in place too. From my experience I would advise having both, if possible.

I had one very uncomfortable incident when mum went to a care home for a respite stay during a time when I was really struggling to cope. The social worker who was assigned at the time started talking about her going off permanently to a care home on the coast. Our home was a long way from the coast! Then when I realised after a few days how awful the respite home was (I now admit that a bit of it was that it really was awful, and that some of it was just because she wasn't getting the quality of care she'd had at home!), I decided to pull her out of there, but then the social worker said she was going to get a 'mental health advocate' involved. It then dawned on me that SS were in control, and without the Health and Welfare LPA I had little say. Fortunately I managed to retrieve her from the home fairly easily and the SW didn't follow through on her 'threat'. But it was a really horrid few days during which I thought I had lost mum to the system forever. I felt better once the second LPA was in place.

On the medical front, because we had a very good GP, I never had to use the Health LPA and I felt that all discussions with the GP and the DNs, and then during those last few days in hospital, were all handled fairly, so there was never any need to me to wave the LPA at them.

For someone like me, who wanted to keep mum at home for as long as possible, it was important to keep control. In hindsight, I think the SW meant well, but she didn't understand enough about our situation and it could so easily have turned into a nightmare.

 

[witts1973]

That must have been a great worry,the soilicitor said we didn't need the health LPA,I'm annoyed now with her for that but it's too late now

 

[KathrynAnne]

My Mum lives at home with me. She is also bed bound and we have carers in 4 times a day for personal care and pad changes. I manage everything else. Like you, I only have the finance LPA but I’ve never felt worried that SS would do anything against my wishes which is to keep Mum at home.
My Mum is self funding and no one has ever suggested moving her into a care home. I always get the impression that a care home is only pushed if the PWD is in danger of harm or neglect. Since this doesn’t apply to your Mum I am sure there is nothing to worry about.

 

[witts1973]

My Mum lives at home with me. She is also bed bound and we have carers in 4 times a day for personal care and pad changes. I manage everything else. Like you, I only have the finance LPA but I’ve never felt worried that SS would do anything against my wishes which is to keep Mum at home.
My Mum is self funding and no one has ever suggested moving her into a care home. I always get the impression that a care home is only pushed if the PWD is in danger of harm or neglect. Since this doesn’t apply to your Mum I am sure there is nothing to worry about.

Hi thanks,that has made me feel better

 

[Witzend]

To be honest, it's a good deal more common for relatives who are becoming utterly exhausted from caring, to wish SS would agree to residential care, than the other way around.

As others have said, SS (unsurprisingly) will usually want the least expensive/troublesome option that's compatible with suitable care. If your mother can be well cared for at home, I'm sure you don't need to worry.