Hi there,
I am writing this in the hope that someone here may be able to help, advise or compare notes!
Here is a brief outline of where we are now:
Back in August we contacted GP and Social Services for help with mum. She was diagnosed with Mixed Dementia about 2.5 years ago and lives alone. In June of this year, her best friend of 50 years passed away and after that we noticed a rapid decline in Mum - mainly to do with depression, which was causing her to not want to eat (she would still prepare her meals but after one bite would push it aside and then throw it away.)
We asked at the time whether Mum could have a couple of weeks respite care somewhere, just so she could be monitored to see what was going on with her eating, and also if there was anything else going on (as she lives alone so we have no idea what goes on when we are not there!). SS said she did not qualify for respite as her situation was not dire enough. The solution from SS was to increase her dose of Mirtazipine (anti depressant) to 30mg and to put an extra care call in at lunchtime to see if mum had eaten.
A review was done early December and we were asked whether in increased dose of Mirtazipine had had any effect - we said no, we didn't think it had had any effect, certainly not on her eating or her mood. The dose was then increased to 45mg - the highest.
Mum came to stay with me over Christmas - and we then experienced a couple of completely "manic" nights. She didn't know where she was, or what she was doing. This mania would start approximately 2 hours after giving her medication.
The last night she was here, I decided to reduce the dose of Mirtazipine so gave her half a tablet instead. This resulted in a quieter night. She stayed for four nights and then I took her home. I stayed overnight with her that night to make sure she was settled. I stayed for most of the following day (Friday) and went home that evening. Over the weekend, I called her a couple of times - and she sounded quite bright and cheerful on the phone. On Sunday, I did the same and had a little chat with her - all seemed OK. A couple of hours later I received a call from the police, saying mum had called them to report my son (her grandson) missing. She said he was 8 years old and had been playing with his friends outside her window. My son is 16 and has never played outside mum's house and doesn't have any friends there.
The police attended and suspected a dementia issue - they phoned me and then I went over to see mum (she lives an hour away).
We called for the out of hours doctor - who confirmed that mum had a urine infection and gave us some antibiotics.
Of course we were worried - so between my sister and I, we have been with mum ever since Sunday afternoon just to see what goes on. It was a bit of a revelation, as she was up and down during the night, cleaning the basin, wandering about, etc etc.
The trouble is now that we don't know how much of her behaviour is down to the UTI ... or the increased medication ... or just the progression of her dementia.
We didn't give her the anti-depressant last night and she had a much better night's sleep - however it was also Day 3 of the antibiotics - so it could be that that helped!
We are now at a point where the GP says that she doesn't think that the 4 calls a day package is enough for mum and if her medication is changed (the CPN wants to change it to Mermantine) then she feels that mum would need to be monitored closely to see what effects the new drug may have on her.
The Social Worker says she needs to come out again to assess mum - she has already been a couple of times so not sure what else she needs to come for. Each time she has visited in the past, Mum has become very distressed in the meeting (she feels very vulnerable and overwhelmed with all the questions).d
My sister and I have both types of PoA and we now wonder how we go about exercising the PoA with regards to the SS? I have already said to the SW not to come to tomorrow's meeting as it will be too distressing for mum. But I'm not sure if the PoA would give us the power to do this?
Any advice would be much appreciated!
I am writing this in the hope that someone here may be able to help, advise or compare notes!
Here is a brief outline of where we are now:
Back in August we contacted GP and Social Services for help with mum. She was diagnosed with Mixed Dementia about 2.5 years ago and lives alone. In June of this year, her best friend of 50 years passed away and after that we noticed a rapid decline in Mum - mainly to do with depression, which was causing her to not want to eat (she would still prepare her meals but after one bite would push it aside and then throw it away.)
We asked at the time whether Mum could have a couple of weeks respite care somewhere, just so she could be monitored to see what was going on with her eating, and also if there was anything else going on (as she lives alone so we have no idea what goes on when we are not there!). SS said she did not qualify for respite as her situation was not dire enough. The solution from SS was to increase her dose of Mirtazipine (anti depressant) to 30mg and to put an extra care call in at lunchtime to see if mum had eaten.
A review was done early December and we were asked whether in increased dose of Mirtazipine had had any effect - we said no, we didn't think it had had any effect, certainly not on her eating or her mood. The dose was then increased to 45mg - the highest.
Mum came to stay with me over Christmas - and we then experienced a couple of completely "manic" nights. She didn't know where she was, or what she was doing. This mania would start approximately 2 hours after giving her medication.
The last night she was here, I decided to reduce the dose of Mirtazipine so gave her half a tablet instead. This resulted in a quieter night. She stayed for four nights and then I took her home. I stayed overnight with her that night to make sure she was settled. I stayed for most of the following day (Friday) and went home that evening. Over the weekend, I called her a couple of times - and she sounded quite bright and cheerful on the phone. On Sunday, I did the same and had a little chat with her - all seemed OK. A couple of hours later I received a call from the police, saying mum had called them to report my son (her grandson) missing. She said he was 8 years old and had been playing with his friends outside her window. My son is 16 and has never played outside mum's house and doesn't have any friends there.
The police attended and suspected a dementia issue - they phoned me and then I went over to see mum (she lives an hour away).
We called for the out of hours doctor - who confirmed that mum had a urine infection and gave us some antibiotics.
Of course we were worried - so between my sister and I, we have been with mum ever since Sunday afternoon just to see what goes on. It was a bit of a revelation, as she was up and down during the night, cleaning the basin, wandering about, etc etc.
The trouble is now that we don't know how much of her behaviour is down to the UTI ... or the increased medication ... or just the progression of her dementia.
We didn't give her the anti-depressant last night and she had a much better night's sleep - however it was also Day 3 of the antibiotics - so it could be that that helped!
We are now at a point where the GP says that she doesn't think that the 4 calls a day package is enough for mum and if her medication is changed (the CPN wants to change it to Mermantine) then she feels that mum would need to be monitored closely to see what effects the new drug may have on her.
The Social Worker says she needs to come out again to assess mum - she has already been a couple of times so not sure what else she needs to come for. Each time she has visited in the past, Mum has become very distressed in the meeting (she feels very vulnerable and overwhelmed with all the questions).d
My sister and I have both types of PoA and we now wonder how we go about exercising the PoA with regards to the SS? I have already said to the SW not to come to tomorrow's meeting as it will be too distressing for mum. But I'm not sure if the PoA would give us the power to do this?
Any advice would be much appreciated!