I've just come across this forum. My biggest bugbear is not with my husband (although we do have our moments) but with family, friends, doctors & other professionals who tell me I must make time for myself but never tell me how I'm meant to do this. My husband get extremely anxious if I'm as much as out of his sight for a few minutes. He follows me everywhere. On the very few occasions when I have to go somewhere on my own by the time I return he is incandescent with rage which can take hours if not days to subside so it really isn't worth the effort of trying to do something on my own for pleasure. In a normal relationship his behaviour would be classified as mental abuse / coercive control but there's nothing normal about our lives.