Morning all.
Firstly, apologies in advance for what I'm about to say. It's been bugging me for ages and since TP is a forum that allows us to "vent" or "rant", thats what I'm going to do. I had thought about starting a new Thread but quickly changed my mind. Of late, there have been a few threads on TP that have caused great distress, veered widely off track and ended badly, helping no one concerned with this disease. This is MY personal view, I take ownership for it and there is no requirement for replies. Please just allow me to rid myself of this:
" Journey". Oh how I loathe the use of this word when describing the horror that is this disease. My mother is in what seems an endless "final stage" of this disease which I find almost unbearable to witness. My god, how she would hate having her bottom wiped, vomit cleaned up etc and hearing herself call out nonsense all day and night. She is not, nor has she been, on a (I want to swear but am not allowed though god knows I reckon this warrants it) a "journey". This is not the stupid X-factor or Strictly Come Dancing where contestants gushingly describe their stupid "journey". This is and has been, for my precious, loving, kindly, mother, sheer hell. She has a progressive, terminal disease that is eating away at her brain and which has robbed her of her dignity. "Journey" .Really everyone? Really? No, no, no. Dress it up all you like, if you must, but don't insult my mother nor her loving children. And don't tell me its just a "turn of phrase" . It's a bad, bad choice if so. This bit is deeply personal and I share it hesitantly but share it I will. My only consolation is my firm and unshakeable belief that when mum's heart beats for the last time, a new home awaits, free of all ills, full of eternal joy. God knows she has earned it.
"God, she's angry this morning" I can hear some say. Yes I am. Oh yes, I am.
I repeat, this is MY personal view. If you don't like it, you dont like it.
Thank you for letting me offload. I know my darling, I know. It gets dressed up and distanced, like the word journey, which as you know, I too loathe and detest. I do not know of many human ordeals as dreadful as this for both sufferer and family and we have to undertake it largely without help for a lot of the time. I feel helpless to do anything on a larger scale, do not really know how to campaign, who would care.
I care, and others of us on TP care about you and your beloved beloved mum. I have the same belief about a new home, there is not much point to our existence and suffering otherwise. I am with you all the way sweetheart. My personal, heartfelt belief is that while consciousness gives the sufferer even a small amount of pleasure, then we as humans help maintain it. After that, I do not know why we do, except the ethical problems and accountability are too enormous. All my love, sweetheart, you know I am with you. Thank you for saying this. Geraldine aka kindred.
Jezzer.
