Goodbye to mum today

Bittermama

Registered User
Jun 9, 2012
27
0
Kingston, Surrey
so the call came this morning, I was at work in the middle of the office when the police rang my mobile to tell me the news. Work were very kind and ushered me into a taxi and sent me on my way to my parents house. She had died in her sleep in the early hours of this morning. I was able to sit with her for an hour or two and held her hand and kissed her cold forehead. I lit candles and my daughter picked a bunch of lavender from the garden (her favourite flower). The house was very busy with carers and phone calls to deal with. Had to break the news to my dad (who himself is 96 and very frail). Sister away, she is back tomorrow and I will,have her to deal with (no,we don’t see eye to eye on a lot of things) she also hid away my mums do not resuscitate document and the ambulance people tried cpr on my poor mum when this was the last thing I wanted for her. This really has upset me the most.
I am writing this in bed, I can’t sleep thinking of my mum laying alone at the hospital.
It’s been a tough 8 long years. She has fought off every sort of illness, in and out of hospital over,the years. She is now free of this debilitating disease and at peace at last.
Tomorrow is another day, so much to do, so much to organise. Thanks for reading.
 

Jezzer

Registered User
Jun 12, 2016
984
0
Lincoln, UK
so the call came this morning, I was at work in the middle of the office when the police rang my mobile to tell me the news. Work were very kind and ushered me into a taxi and sent me on my way to my parents house. She had died in her sleep in the early hours of this morning. I was able to sit with her for an hour or two and held her hand and kissed her cold forehead. I lit candles and my daughter picked a bunch of lavender from the garden (her favourite flower). The house was very busy with carers and phone calls to deal with. Had to break the news to my dad (who himself is 96 and very frail). Sister away, she is back tomorrow and I will,have her to deal with (no,we don’t see eye to eye on a lot of things) she also hid away my mums do not resuscitate document and the ambulance people tried cpr on my poor mum when this was the last thing I wanted for her. This really has upset me the most.
I am writing this in bed, I can’t sleep thinking of my mum laying alone at the hospital.
It’s been a tough 8 long years. She has fought off every sort of illness, in and out of hospital over,the years. She is now free of this debilitating disease and at peace at last.
Tomorrow is another day, so much to do, so much to organise. Thanks for reading.
I am so very sorry. How distressing for you to witness CPR being administered on your poor mum. As you say, the last thing you wanted. Your precious mum is finally free of this awful illness but this does not take away the pain you are feeling. In time, I hope you will be able to take comfort from earlier, happy memories. Take care and please accept my sincere condolences.
 

Bittermama

Registered User
Jun 9, 2012
27
0
Kingston, Surrey
I am so very sorry. How distressing for you to witness CPR being administered on your poor mum. As you say, the last thing you wanted. Your precious mum is finally free of this awful illness but this does not take away the pain you are feeling. In time, I hope you will be able to take comfort from earlier, happy memories. Take care and please accept my sincere condolences.
Thank you
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
73,993
0
72
Dundee
I’m so sorry to read your sad news. I’m glad your mum is at peace now. Thinking of you and your dad.and wishing you strength.
 

mumsgone

Registered User
Dec 23, 2015
924
0
be brave sweetheart, the days will melt into weeks then months and eventually you will feel more at peace and be able to look back on all the good things from the past rather than the painful ones that are very raw at the moment. Take care of yourself xx
 

LynneMcV

Volunteer Moderator
May 9, 2012
6,110
0
south-east London
I am so sorry for your loss. Although we can take comfort in knowing that our loved ones are finally free of this disease and at peace it is still hard to get through all the turmoil that follows.

My sincere condolences to you and your family - sending you strength for these difficult days.
 

love.dad.but..

Registered User
Jan 16, 2014
4,962
0
Kent
Am so sorry but don't torment yourself with these thoughts and the processes that now need to happen...your mum knew you were wonderful in helping her at every stage and sometimes events are just outside of our control. My mum died suddenly we found her on the 80th birthday the following day..dad because of dementia couldn't raise the alarm. I too had thoughts of what ifs..mum needed me I wasn't there...but they serve no good purpose and you were there when your mum needed you most in life far more important than in death. I wish you strength over the coming days.
 

marmarlade

Registered User
Jan 26, 2015
183
0
So very sorry to hear about your Mum. My condolences to you and your Dad and wishing you strength for the days ahead.
well you have come to the right place because we all understand how you feel and all the what if,s I to wasnt there when my hubby passed away, the day before he managed to whisper I love you that was so hard ,but he was at peace now no pain no being confused ,and as time goes by you will not wish them back to suffer ,so I think of it as he,s happy again and we will meet again one day
 

Toony Oony

Registered User
Jun 21, 2016
576
0
So sorry for your loss - sending my thoughts and condolences from nearby Surbiton.

'Because the love of a mother starts before birth
Her love will endure long after death'
 

Toony Oony

Registered User
Jun 21, 2016
576
0
@Jezzer

I'm really not sure who the author of the quote is. It resonated with me and I had it in my cache of quotes gleaned from Pinterest. It may be Franchesca Cox .... but then again, it might not!

X
 

Rolypoly

Registered User
Jan 15, 2018
2,319
0
Sorry to hear of your loss and wishing you strength to see you through the coming days.
 

Amethyst59

Registered User
Jul 3, 2017
5,776
0
Kent
I’m so sorry to hear of your sad loss and wish you strength for allyou have to do in the coming days and weeks.