Has anybody on here had experience of a family member who has had an ileostomy and following the operation has shown signs of the onset of dementia? My husband underwent an emergency operation on the 20th January and came home last week after 7 weeks in hospital. Whilst in hospital his sodium levels dropped to below 117 which is apparently dangerous, and he was very confused. Unfortunately, even though they managed to get his sodium normalised, his confusion remained. He thought I had put him in prison, he had no idea where he was or what he had done and grew very agitated at night when I was leaving and had to be distracted by the nurses. He also had no idea he had a stoma- never mind that his bag might need emptying or changing.
He had shown signs of forgetfulness before the operation, but nowhere near the extent of confusion he was displaying. In hospital his stoma bag was bursting/leaking on a regular basis and I was having to wash 1 or 2 sets of soiled clothes a day! One nurse said this was normal to have so many “mishaps”!
Things were so bad that the day before he came home they were talking about long term care. You can imagine my trepidation , nay fear, of him coming home. I had visions of his bag bursting/leaking every night, changing bed linen at all hours and nights of disturbed sleep. Then there was the confusion to deal with as well as the cancer treatment in the future. He was oblivious to it all! However there was no way I would consider long term care at this point.
He has been home a week now and I have some sort of a routine. His delerium has almost disappeared; he now knows where he is and sometimes understands when I say we must empty his bag- but he does not initiate this homself. We have had “mishaps” but have coped- just. I am learning to laugh when he says daft things, which does help although it is not always easy. Even going out for a short drive I find requires great planning. Conversation, spontaneous activities and normality are becoming a thing of the past- the man I married over 40 years ago is beginning to disappear.
I know I need to do things for myself, if anyone else tells me that I might go mad, it is facilitating that which is the difficulty.
It would be great to chat to anybody who is in the same situation- perhaps exchange ideas that have worked for them. Happy days!
He had shown signs of forgetfulness before the operation, but nowhere near the extent of confusion he was displaying. In hospital his stoma bag was bursting/leaking on a regular basis and I was having to wash 1 or 2 sets of soiled clothes a day! One nurse said this was normal to have so many “mishaps”!
Things were so bad that the day before he came home they were talking about long term care. You can imagine my trepidation , nay fear, of him coming home. I had visions of his bag bursting/leaking every night, changing bed linen at all hours and nights of disturbed sleep. Then there was the confusion to deal with as well as the cancer treatment in the future. He was oblivious to it all! However there was no way I would consider long term care at this point.
He has been home a week now and I have some sort of a routine. His delerium has almost disappeared; he now knows where he is and sometimes understands when I say we must empty his bag- but he does not initiate this homself. We have had “mishaps” but have coped- just. I am learning to laugh when he says daft things, which does help although it is not always easy. Even going out for a short drive I find requires great planning. Conversation, spontaneous activities and normality are becoming a thing of the past- the man I married over 40 years ago is beginning to disappear.
I know I need to do things for myself, if anyone else tells me that I might go mad, it is facilitating that which is the difficulty.
It would be great to chat to anybody who is in the same situation- perhaps exchange ideas that have worked for them. Happy days!
